Question:
Less than 7 days to go! SCARED TO DEATH!
First thing: Has anyone had Dr. DiMarco for surgery? Next: I just told a physician friend of mine (caridologist) what I am having done and he jumped right in to tell me that he has never met anyone who has had the surgery that is happy with it. This was a surprise considering all the good stuff I read here. Granted, he's not a "gastro" doc but he has had a few patients with this procedure. After listening, I got the impression they may have had the old procedure involving liver damage and so on. Anyone else out there have to deal with these motivational speakers? — Guy C. (posted on June 23, 2000)
June 23, 2000
I guess I would say that everyone is different and has different emotions
running through their head prior to surgery. If you are feeling nervous
and afraid, it is perfectly natural. Just hang in there - it will pass.
But what your doctor friend said about never having met anyone who is happy
with the surgery is totally false and very uninformed. That may be his own
limited personal experience, but to imply that everyone is unhappy needs to
be taken with a grain of salt. Many of us on this site have heard second
hand horror stories prior to our surgery - from well meaning friends,
family, and yes, even doctors. How long ago did they have the surgery?
(Today's versions are much safer and more effective.) What other health
complications did they have prior to surgery? Did they do their part
afterwards? This surgery is only a tool and demands work on your end as
well. There is no miracle cure for obesity. To say that there are no
risks or complications associated with this surgery would be very
misleading. People do have issues, but the vast majority do not. Tell
your friend to check out this site. There are also several on-line sources
for doctors. Before scaring you unneccessarily, he needs to better inform
himself about WLS. If you are feeling anxious, try to keep yourself busy
and concentrate on other things. You'll do fine!!! And whatever anxiety
you do experience will be well worth it! Best of luck to you.
— Paula G.
June 23, 2000
I have 23 days to go til surgery, myself. I can understand the
way that you feel. Yesterday I woke up depressed and jittery.
The feelings stayed w/ me all day. Today I am feeling better and
am going to go out and do some shopping to get my mind off the
fear of surgery. I also keep in close contact w/ post of members
of this wls website via email. That helps me emensely!! I share my
feelings w/ them. They understand. They also give me words of
encouragement.
Each day I have a choice. Do I want to walk down the road of FAITH OR the
road of FEAR? It is up to me, entirely. I want to be in the proper
emotional
state when I get to the day of surgery cause I know that my emotional
state
will have an effect on my recovery. Please, take it easy. Take it ONE DAY
AT
A TIME..maybe even, 5 minutes at a time when things get rough. {{{hugs}}}}
— kathy S.
June 23, 2000
What's to be afraid of? Just because a total stranger is going to ask you
to get naked, then gut you like a fish, stick his hands in you, re-route
your bowels and forever alter the way you can eat. I mean, come on, now,
what kind of fraidy cat would whimper over a lil' ole thing like that???
Wimp! Fondly, The Biggest Chicken,
— merri B.
June 23, 2000
Doesn't it just figure that, just as you're going to have a life-changing
(not to mention life-AFFIRMING) experience, the naysayers come out of the
freakin' woodwork? Reminds me of the horror stories I heard about labour
and delivery when I was pregnant (I was in labour for three weeks, no pain
killers, breech birth of quadruplets ... most ladies who've had kids know
the drill). You're right to be nervous about the surgery -- who in their
right mind looks FORWARD to being cut open? -- but don't listen to what the
"negative nellies" in your life have to say, DOCTORS INCLUDED.
Everybody has a cousin, or a co-worker, or a friend, or a chance
acquaintance, who's had a negative experience with whatever you're planning
to do. Thousands and thousands of us have gone through the valley of the
shadow and come out on the other side. Think positive, be positive -- on
the whole, the experience IS positive. Good luck and good thoughts always,
— Cheryl Denomy
June 23, 2000
Just wanted to let you know that Dr. DiMarco is also my dr. I am stilling
waitng for approval from the Insurance company. But everthing that I have
about Dr. Dimarco sounds great. Good luck and keep me posted on how you
are doing. I know what youmean about being scared, one day I am excited
andthen the next scared to death!
— Jennifer N.
June 23, 2000
Guy,
If what Merri Busch posted doesn't get you through this anxiety, not much
will:)...But seriously the best way to relieve this kind of apprehension is
to ask questions. And keep asking more questions, the more you know, the
less you will worry. Organize your thoughts, determine just what it is that
you are concerned about. Is it post-op pain, or possible complications, or
possibly that it won't work for you? Once you know What you are worried
about then you can find ways to ease the worry:) I had the same reaction
the first time I had to have surgery, for knee repair. The Doctor said
surgery, I said "You want to CUT on me??" and proceeded to get
sick:p But 4 surgeries later I can tell you, I'm not really worried about
having WLS. Because I have done my research, I have found this website and
all the Wonderfull people here:) I also know that whatever happens I am
prepared to meet it. I have a living will and a regular will, these things
I have done to make things easier on my family should things go terribly
wrong. But I am a Great believer of fate. I believe that if it's your
"time to go", then no matter where you are, or what you are
doing, it's gonna happen. BTW right after I made my decision about the
surgery, I told a friend who then begged me not to have it. He had had WLS
in 1980 and even showed me his scar trying to change my mind. He is
currently over 500 lbs. But other things he told me lead me to believe that
he did not follow his diet after surgery and so of course it didn't work
for him. However that was 20years ago and that does Not mean I won't be
succesful:) And from everything I have read here, of those who are post-op,
even with complications, they would do it all again, in a Heartbeat! Also
from postings here and personal experience Physicians are some of the Most
Prejudiced and Ignorant people when it comes to dealing with Morbid
Obesity! Good Luck:)ttfn
— Barbara I.
June 23, 2000
Look in the library under surgery types. Find the subcategory, Mortality
Rate. In this response to my
question, Melanie eloquently put the issue at ease for
me. Until then, hears a quote from Nelson Mandela, "I've got my
faith, and that's all I need". Look deep within, If you you don't
have a certain comfort level at this point and the faith is just not there
for you...then cancel the surgery. If you're not comfortable with your
surgeon's abilities, then find another one. You are the master of your own
destiny! Only go through this process when in the midst of fear, the only
answer you can come up with is 'This is what I want to do, need to do, and
will do...accepting all consequences'. This is what you do when you have
faith.
— Tonya K.
June 23, 2000
You are so lucky to be 7 days away from a great lifestyle change. My family
and co-workers thought this surgery for me was a crazy,ridiculas idea. I
went to the hospital for the surgery all by myself because I was sick of
family and friends reminding me of the mistake I was going to make. I am
almost one moth post-op and have lost almost 36 lbs. I have been back to
work full time as an RN at a leading children's hospital for two weeks
already. The attitudes of these people have changed they are all on the
band wagon for support. Grab a beer and a bag of chips and go watch some
TV. In just a few short weeks you'll be at the gym full of energy,eating
healthy and being tottaly full and satisfied. You will be getting tired of
these same doubting people complimenting you on how wonderful you look.
Hang in there the best is yet to come.Remember it's you life. Go take a
part in it.
— MARY E.
June 24, 2000
Well here is one person that is real happy with his decision to have
surgery. My life was terrible and it has improved greatly. Sure I have had
to make changes but they needed to be made anyhow. I have lost 188 lbs in 8
months and feel really good now. I tried to post this so I hope this one
takes. Feel free to emial me with male questions. It is a little different
for men than women
— snicklefritz
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