Question:
Severe depression, regrets, and food disgust
Someone please help me. I had a lap RNY on 7/23 and there was an obstruction causing me to have a second surgery on 7/26. I then developed pneumonia. I came home 2 weeks ago today and was so happy. Now for the last week I am crying so much. I can't sit still. I feel like I am losing my mind. I also get severe hunger pangs, but hate to eat. Everything tastes terrible to me. I take wellbutrin (300 mg for depression). Please help me. My husband has lost patience with me as he didn't want me to do this to begin with. I didn't ever think this would happen to me. I just thought I would have normal aches and pains and eat less. I regret this so much. I have no interest in anything. Would xanax help me? Who should I call my surgeon, PCP, or psychiatrist? I cannot sleep either. I am desperate and wish I could turn back the clock. — Cathy K. (posted on August 12, 2001)
August 11, 2001
So sorry that you're having these problems. I would definitly call your
psychiatrist, your meds can be adjusted and that might help. Also, I want
to tell you that this is normal. A lot of people experience depression for
sometime post-op. I think it hits us that suffer from depresson normally,
much harder. I had the same problem myself and it has gotten much much
better. Just know that it will get better and call you doc for more meds.
best of luck
— Lisa B.
August 11, 2001
Hang in there!!! Your body just went thru a major adjustment. I had trouble
sleeping too. Call or e-mail your surg and ask he has had other patients
that have had these type of issues. Don't lose faith. It will all work out.
Seek psy help too. Get all the help and answers you deserve.
— [Anonymous]
August 12, 2001
I too worry this might happen to me post surgical, I hope I have enough
strength to call the Psychiatrist. You might have an absorbtion problem
with your meds.
— [Anonymous]
August 12, 2001
I had the major depression, crying, hunger and food repulsion at first too
and I didn't have any complications like you did so I can only imagine how
you feel. I would let all three doctors know what is going on, especially
your surgeon and shrink. I know about everything you're talking about first
hand because you're describing me early post-op. I did not feel
"human" for a month (with no complications or second surgery) and
did not feel really good and 'normal' for 6 weeks, so please give yourself
a little more time. I am 4 months post-op and the depression and problems
have been long gone. All that is left is the weight loss and the better
health and a great sense of accomplishment and well being. I had Lap/rny.
Please know that IT DOES GET BETTER. As far as the food and liquids go, at
this time in your recovery it is very important that you sip liquids
constantly so you don't get dehydrated. For now eat small amounts of food
frequently. Don't let yourself go until you're starving because you'll eat
too fast and it will not sit right or even come back up. It may not taste
good now but that will soon pass. It's important that you eat even though
you don't want to. And I can't stress this enough - eat SLOWLY, and CHEW
CHEW CHEW. Don't give up. Much brighter times are on the horizon for you. I
know it's impossible for you to see that right now but it is true. Take
comfort from all of the people who've had WLS and have been where you are
now and have not only survived but became so much healthier and happier
because of their WLS. Peace to you.
— [Anonymous]
August 12, 2001
I think you still would have depression, regrets and food disgust EVEN IF
you had'nt had those problems but this made it worse.
I'm 3 months (and almost one week post op) and can tell you very honestly
that I hated food for the first 8-9 weeks. Smells nasuated me too. But now
food tastes so good and I'm so hungry again I'm afraid I will over eat and
not lose anymore weight. So I guess depending on where we are "time
wise" and whatever complications (thank God so far I have'nt had any)
we are in different stages.
I also take Wellbutrin. However I've hardly taken any medicines since
surgery as pills are very hard to take. I'm finally getting where it's not
to bad now, but I need my Wellbutrin... well anyway with the exception of
your second surgery and phnemonia, I understand what you are feeling. Feel
free to email me if you want to unload. I don't know everything, but one
thing I do understand IS PAIN. I've gone through 11 surgeries in my life
most of which went very badly. I'm still disabled from some of them.
Anyway, I know very well the depression and hopelessness. Sometimes it just
helps to be able to "vent" have a "self pity party",
then pick yourself up and carry on. Sometimes we can run away or ignore our
problems, other times we have no choice we have to go through them (like
with your second surgery). My gut feeling is that now that the second
surgery is over that you will begin to heal, little by little. So slowly
that it's anoying, but still heal. The food adverstion WILL go away. I
could'nt drink OJ or coffee for nine weeks! I'm still not to crazy about my
coffee. Just keep telling yourself, in two months it will be better. Kind
of like Dorthy in the Wizzard of Oz, "there is no place like
home". Over and over, keep saying to yourself, "in two months I
will be better". It's almost certain you will! You have to KNOW there
ARE better days coming! Those of us who have deprresion probally get hit
with a worse deppression after surgery. So you need to have this faith that
you will be better. Hang in there. The worst "should be over
now", and the clouds will be clearing away to a bright sunny future.
;)
— Danmark
August 12, 2001
First of all sit down and take a few deep breaths
What you have done to your body is not easy
it takes a few weeks to feel human again
yes depression can set in
the anisthsia ( spell ck) does weird things to your body
and you have gone under twice in a very short time
call the Doc and he will get you on a stronger anti depressant
as for eating and being replused I also was and still am by certin
smells and sometime the sight of certin foods I use to love
stick with what you know feels good ..
at this stage I am sure it is very soft easy to digest foods
take a nice hot shower
pamper your self
tell your self that yes this is going to be hard
don't go around the house whinning
accept what you have chose to do to your body
accept that it will take weeks approximately 6 to feel simi normal
again
but know this
It Will Get Better
trust us on this one
That thought should carry you thru
4 more weeks and each and every day will get a little easier
Your not going crazy this is just difficult
Accept that FACT
Rest, drink your water, take and eat your Proteins ( cottage cheese, eggs,
cheese, things like that)
drink your protein drink, take you vitamens, follow the plan
set out by your Doc
and re-evaluate your progress weekly
did it become better
there will be set backs also
take them in stride
good luck
Kathy
— Kathleen M.
August 12, 2001
Different antidepressents work for diff. people. Call the Dr. who
prescribed it in the first place and make a appoint. with your physc. Do
not let it go, and do not think you are weak. Chemicle imbalances are real
and sometimes we need help with meds to get them back on track!Also, say
positive thoughts to your self, even though you do not feel like it.
— [Anonymous]
August 12, 2001
Hi Cathy. I will add one thing. I also developed pneumonia right after
surgery (2 weeks post-op). I was back in the hospital for 5 days. For me,
without a doubt the worst part of my "WLS experience" was the
first 3 weeks after this return. The two oral antibiotics I had to take
for the pneumonia affected me horribly. It left a terrible taste in my
mouth (which affected anything I tried to eat). I was brushing my teeth 7
- 8 times a day trying to get rid of it. Within a few days, I felt my
whole body started smelling like this (my wife claimed she never noticed a
thing). Based upon my experience, is it possible your distaste of food
could be from this? Are you taking oral antibiotics, and if so, when do
you finish? I wish you the best!!! Kevin
— meilankev
August 12, 2001
Cathy: I had lap BPD/DS 22 months ago w/o any complications but can still
relate to some of your feelings. First, be proactive in your care -- call
ALL your doctors if you need to, to ensure that your meds are being
absorbed and everything is going on schedule. Second, give yourself a
break, and don't expect to feel great as yet. However, you will do better
if you can change your mental attitude around. I tried to pat myself on
the back and really notice every little improvement while I told myself how
much better I felt today than I did the day before (sometimes I even felt
better after a nap and could note it). I had a large group of DS friends
who were cheering me on and letting me know that recovery, improved eating,
etc., were assuredly around the corner. Look toward that day -- try not to
get bogged down in the aches, pains and irrational food preferences of
early recovery. I'm here to tell you that I couldn't touch tuna or egg
salads (my pre-op and current staples) for 6-9 months after surgery. Most
times I'd get a meal and was so finicky that I couldn't even taste it. I
really mourned my inabiity to tolerate coffee as I had as a pre-op, but
after 6 months I'm back, baby I'm back. What I'm trying to say is that we
humans are strong and can tolerate worse than this -- as long as it's not
forever. Thing of the present problems as the dues you have to pay to get
the healthy happy life you want. Take pleasure in your aftercare, your
diligence to your program, your improvement and your weight loss and look
to the future. THINGS WILL GET BETTER and you will feel better sooner if
it is BECAUSE of you, not inspite of you.
— Jill L.
August 12, 2001
Hi, I , right after surgery was in your shoes, with the depression and the
regrets. I came home and was fine, and then all of a sudden it hit. I
started thinking about the things that could go wrong. I started thinking
how much I loved food, and then having pain from surgery on top of that.
I sat around and cried for a few days, driving my husband and my mother
insane. I think it's normal to go though a regret syndrome with this type
of major change. But what got me back to being "almost" normal
was thinking about why I wanted this so bad. I hate being fat. I faced my
fears by talking to my surgeon about them. It made me feel better. Have
you gone to a support group?. Being around others that are in the same
boat, and dealing with the same things can make you feel like your not
alone. Eventually your depression will pass, especially when you notice
that oyur surgery is doing exactly what it suppose to do, make you thin.
— [Anonymous]
August 12, 2001
I have not had my surgery either but I have been on Prozac and then started
gaining weight (I think it was my imagination) So I got on Wellbutrin. That
made me irratible all the time. I did go back to prozac and it does work
wonderful but take the advice of those who tell you to go back to the
doctor who precribed your wellbutrin and tell him or her about ur stress.
AND GET SOME COUNCILING> it helps to vent. Take it easy you did the
right thing.
— kris71872
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