Describe your behavioral and emotional battle with weight control before learning about bariatric surgery.
My battle with my weight began when I became pregnant with my first child where I gained 53 pounds. With my second child, I gained 34 pounds. From then on I would diet, loose, gain, over and over for the next 12 years. I had health issues which added to the problem. I was a homemaker and I was happy with my children and my husband. I enjoyed taking care of my family, but I was not taking care of my body and my self esteem. I thought as long as I was making them happy, then that was all that mattered. My husband and I was in a comfortable place in our marriage with no excitement. My female problems contributed to a low sex drive which we know all men cannot deal with too good. For 5 years we went on as a family and slowly drifting apart. I would always rely on my best friend, food. It definately made me feel better. As my children went to school there were many times that I went to special events with my husband walking with my children ahead of me. My children were always following their dad, and I, in the back, was always following my family. There was a reason for my husband to walk ahead, and it wasn't just because he walked fast. I always knew why. This was usually how our family went on outings, if we went. It became a routine that I went to all the school functions without my husband. I know my children loved me unconditionally, but I did not get this feeling from their dad. Our marriage finally ended after 14 years with my husband having 3 affairs from the internet. He stayed with the last one and they are still together after 4 years. I became depressed, but walked around with a mask. I went to work where I work with children. They always made me smile, so my mind was in a happy place at work. I always tried to tuck away my thoughts as soon as I came home to my children. It was very hard over the years and financially, emotionally, and mentally I became very tired. I had a heart condition that sress made it worsen. It was a problem with the heart muscle. Over the first six months since my divorce, it became so bad that they kept me in the hospital from a episode that sent me to the doctor. Within five days I was undergoing open heart surgery. Being overweight as I was made it very difficult to recooperate from the surgery. I lost 30 pounds within the time that I was healing. I gained that back plus more. I was on my way to 300 pounds. My face looked like a blow fish, and I felt like a sumo wrestler. I hated getting dressed because nothing felt comfortable except a blanket from the couch. My underware looked like volkswagon covers so I did my own folding of my clothes. I still continued to live as best as I could attending different events with my kids. There is one that was devistating. I went to my daughter's open house where we as parents changed classes so that we knew their routine at school. The first class we all were to sit in the classroom desks, yeah right. Well I approached the desk and sat down and had to squeeze my self into it and not breath hard. If a fire broke out and I had to get up and run, I would have had to taken the desk with me because it was just that tight. I did magage to get through that experience. Another awful experience was 3 years ago. My kids and 2 fiends went to six flags over Georgia. As we got near to the end of the line to take a seat on the hangman ride, I watch another overweight lady get on, get buckled, and away she went. I thought oh good, if she can fit, I know I can. I was happy and proceeded to wait my turn. I stepped up, got on and was so humiliated. The above arms would not buckle, I was too big for the ride and I was helped down off the ride in front of my kids and our friends and not to mention the other 500 people watching.
After crying the whole time they rode the ride, I felt a little better, but I still had my problem. I managed to tuck this ordeal behind me with all the other ones. Within this time I had contemplated on the gastric bypass surgery. I would always change my mind because of the risk of death. My diabetes got worse as well as the problems that came with it. My mind was really wanting the surgery. I then was dealing with my uncle suffering with diabets and he had lost his eyesight in one eye and the other eye was in bad shape. He then lost a leg by amputation, and dialysis was a trip for him 3 times a week. He got so bad until he was put on a feeding tube. His diabetes was slowly killing him. The doctors wanted to discontinue the dialysis, but he would have died then. He continued on dialysis for 3 years which was longer than anticipated. My uncle was very sick and was not the uncle I use to have. My mind was set and everything went into motion and I had my surgery on July 2, 2004. Seeing my uncle was definitly an eye opener to my decision. I did not want my kids to see me die this way. By the time it would have taken me to loose 80 pounds, I would be suffering and diabetes would have robbed my life like it did my uncles. I loved my uncle, he was like a 2nd dad. His wife also has diabetes, but is keeping hers under control except for some skin problems. This risk of death having the surgery was not as much a worry than the worry of my kids watching me die a horrible death. My uncle died on December 4,2004 after a long time of suffering with diabetes.
I can say that I know that God was watching over me as he has always done. My uncle is not suffering anymore and the pain is gone. I have given a second chance at life with my children and I owe it all to bariatric surgery and the hands that God placed me in . I will continue to reach my goal, do the things I know I need to do and live life to its fullest. If there are days that life may get me down, I can hold my head up and look at myself and smile because I am happy with myself and I did it myself with the help of this surgery. There are so many little things that matter so much to me now that may sound trivial to alot of people. I enjoy crossing my legs, soaking in a bathtub without the watering running out, painting my toenails without holding my breath in between toes, fitting into a booth at many fast food restuarants, especially krystals. I enjoy looking at before and after pictures. My kids and I got a new family picture taken for Christmas and I was amazed at how different I looked. I actually liked my picture. Last year about the same time we got a family picture made at the church and I bought them only because it was a family picture, but I hated me in it. I felt like I made the picture look horrible. The kids liked it and so I went with their feelings. I was happy to give them to friends and family as gifts. I enjoy going shopping now since I can walk past the plus size dept. I enjoy watching myself melt into another size. I really focus on my portions, carbohydrates, and water intake and most of all protein. By eating protein first, it fills you up faster and stays with you longer. By eating carbohydrates first makes you stay hungry. Drinking your water really helps you to loose even if you don't excercise as you should, but we know the importance of excercise. This is one area that I am working on now and I'm making this my New Year's Resolution. I can't speak enough about the great comments of how my appearance looks now. I'm hoping to be able to meet someone to make me happy one day as well as making him happy. Good things come to those who wait, so I'm sticking with that now, but with one eye open. I feel so healthy and this was my main reason for my surgery and it has been one goal that I have accomplished. My advise to everyone is to not give up, be brave if you are considering the surgery, and follow doctor's orders and you will be starting on your journey to a new and healthy life as I am living now. Remember, nothing tastes as good as thin feels. Good Luck. Kathy Pierce WLS
What was (is) the worst thing about being overweight?
Being unhealthy, diabetes. Not being a happy person.
If you have had weight loss surgery already, what things do you most enjoy doing now that you weren't able to do before?
Crossing my legs, taking a bath and keeping all of the water in the tub, painting my toenails without holding my breath in between toes, having a picture taken, wearing jeans with snaps and a zipper, shopping in the misses dept., looking in the mirror or reflection and just smilling at myself.
kathy P.