How did you first find out about bariatric surgery and what were your initial impressions of it?

My mother had it done 12 years ago. She has the "ring". At the time I thought she was stupid for doing it. I couldn't see myself going through the throwing up and the initial pain of the surgery. I just kept saying "better you than me" and "No, not me, not ever".

Describe your experience with getting insurance approval for surgery. What advice, if any, do you have for other people in this stage?

I had no problem getting my insurance to approve the surgery. It only took 4 days. My advice to others at this stage is to make a list of everything that hurts, bothers you, etc. Such as back aches, insomnia, trouble breathing, sleep apnea, high blood pressure, arthritis, diabetes. Anything that may be linked to your weight. Also make sure the doctor knows if you have a family history of any diseases that might be triggered by weight.

What was your first visit with your surgeon like? How can people get the most out of this meeting?

My surgeon was very friendly and knowledgeable. My mother used him 12 years earlier. He drew diagrams for my husband (he's a visual learner) so he could understand exactly what we were talking about, discussed risks, benefits, what to expect, what would happen at the hospital, diet and exercise, importance of after care and support groups, and the importance of family support. He spent a great deal of time speaking with my husband to put him at ease. I had already made my decision, but my husband wasn't so sure about it. My advice is to write down every question about the surgery that pops into your head in the weeks (or days) preceeding your appointment and take them with you. Your doctor should not make you feel "stupid" and should appreciate how seriously you are taking this.

What made you finally decide to have the surgery?

Knowing that I was "morbidly obese" and that I couldn't lose the weight myself. I couldn't exercise because I was too big to walk for more that a few feet without getting winded and having excrutiating pain in my back and knees.

How did you decide which proceedure to have?

I knew others who had the RNY and I was pleased with their results. I also knew I wanted it done "open" because that gives the surgeon a chance to see the organs and monitor their functions. I just felt it was more thorough if I was totally opened up.

What fears did you have about having complications or even dying from from the surgery, and what would you tell other people having the same fears now?

I was scared to death to throw up. I just knew I would bust something! I also didn't think I would wake up from the anesthetic. I am a huge wimp, so pain was also a big fear for me. For others with these same fears: Throwing up - it's not as awful as it sounds and doesn't hurt nearly as much as you would think. It can also be an early warning sign that something may be wrong and it can be fixed quickly and early on. Coming out of the anesthetic - they wouldn't do the surgery if it was that risky. Being as overweight as I was, I was more at risk if I didn't go through with it. Pain - I had a lot of pain the first day, but I only vaguely remember it. I had a morphine drip and could get more at the touch of a button, so I was pretty drugged up that first day and only woke up enough to press the button. The pain was substantially reduced by the next day.

How did your family and friends react to your decision? Would you have communicated anything differently if you could now? How supportive were they after your surgery?

My husband was supportive but worried. My mom loved it that I was following in her footsteps. My dad wished I could do it myself without having to have surgery. My sister and all of my children were worried, but supportive. My mother in law was very supportive. I knew it was ultimately my own decision and nothing anybody said could make me change my mind (I'm also VERY stubborn!) Afterward, everyone was very supportive, which definitely helped in my recovery.

How did your employer/supervisor react to your decision? What did you tell him/her? How long were you out of work?

I told my supervisor about my decision the day I woke up and said "This is what I want to do". I even called the Center for Surgical Weight Loss from work and she allowed everything to be faxed to me at work, where I filled it out and faxed it all back. She was very supportive, as were the rest of my co-workers. They were very concerned about the safety of the procedure, my ability to attend potluck lunches afterward, etc. We were a very food-based company. Everything centered around lunches, potlucks, breakfast meetings, etc. I had the surgery on 12/13/00 and returned to work on 12/26/00. I have a desk job, no lifting or anything like that.

What was your stay in the hospital like? How long where you there? What things are most important to bring?

I was in the hospital for 5 days. One day in intensive care and the other 4 in a room with one other person. The hospital stay was great. The staff was very supportive. I had a nurse and an aide that really went above and beyond to make sure I was comfortable. The most important things to bring are: toothbrush and toothpaste, shampoo for your first shower, good slippers and robe (you'll be doing a lot of walking around the hospital to get used to moving again, it also speeds healing time and helps with gas), and a good book or hand-held game.

Did you have any complications from the surgery? If so, how did you deal with them?

I didn't really have any complications other than intense itching at the sight of the scar as it started to heal (Aveeno lotion works wonders!) and I started throwing up at 5 1/2 weeks after eating some small bits of chicken (I cheated and started a little early on solids) and the doctor thought I might have clogged something, so I had to have endoscopy done. No blockage, just the flu!

In the weeks after you got your surgery date, how did you feel? How did you cope with any anxiety you might have felt?

I cried a lot after the surgery for about 2 weeks. The doctor had already warned me that this is a common side effect of the anesthetic and a lot of people go through it as the body cleans out. I would just cry for no reason, not like sobbing-type crying, but just suddenly get sad and tears would start. That all passed after 2 weeks. I was also depressed over what I could and couldn't eat.

Describe your first few weeks home from the hospital. What should people expect from this period?

I was a little weak from the surgery. I slept a lot. I also lost 10 pounds during the 5 day hospital stay. I was bored. I went back to work 13 days after my surgery out of sheer boredom. I was afraid if I stayed home any longer I would do somehing stupid (like housecleaning) and hurt myself. I was much safer at work answering calls, helping others, and typing.

How far did you travel to have your surgery? (If far, how did this affect your aftercare?)

I live 3 hours from Whittier. I can't attend the support group meetings, but they have an 800 number I can call with any questions. I schedule all appointments for the same day, so I only have to take 1 day off. After care is extremely important and I have always made sure to keep appointments.

Please describe in detail what things you could and couldn't eat in the weeks and months following surgery. What foods have been off limits? Please explain how your dietary tolerance changed week-by-week, and then month-by-month since surgery.

For the first 2 weeks, I lived on sugar free Instant Breakfast mixed with nonfat milk 3 times per day. I could have broths, very soupy malt-o-meal, 100% juice frozen juice bars and sugar free jello. Then the next 2 weeks I lived on sugar free baby food, Kentucky Fried Chicken's mashed potatoes and gravy and Taco Bell's beans and cheese. I learned that refried beans were very filling and fat free varieties could be found at the grocery store. The next 2 weeks, I slowly added foods. If I felt awful after I ate it (and that WILL happen), I just avoided it for a while, then tried again at a later date. If I had the same reaction, I avoid it to this day. For 9 months after surgery, I avoided sugar like the plague. Now I can have a small sliver of cake or a bite of a candy bar, but I won't allow myself more than that. I also have trouble with milk, but lactaid is a good substitute and doesn't taste too bad. Food tolerances can also change with your moods. Also, don't try to eat a meal when you are upset, it usually comes right back up. Instead, eat a very small snack.

What was your actvity level in the days and weeks after surgery?

My activity level was fairly low right after surgery. They made me get out of bed and walk around beginning the day after surgery. I'm sure glad they did. If not, I could have still been laying around! I got stronger and stronger by the day, and was being chauffered around town by my sister-in-law, going shopping, etc. One week post-op.

What vitamins and/or dietary supplements have you taken since your surgery?

I take a multivitamin, a protein suppliment especially for hair and nails (I had a lot of hair loss), B-12, iron, and a Viactive chewable calcium suppliment.

What side effects (nausea, vomiting, sleep disturbace, dumping, hair loss etc.) were worse for you? For how long after surgery did they persist? How did you cope with them?

Dumping and hair loss were the worst things for me. The hair loss started about 2 months after surgery and lasted until about 9-10 months post-op. The dumping started once I could eat solid foods again. It's good in that it shows me what I can and cannot have now, but it's a very strange feeling (racing pulse, cold sweats, shaking, dizziness, etc.) I still occassionally get it, but it always passes in about 15 minutes, quicker if I actually throw up from it.

What was the worst part about the entire bariatric surgery process?

When I first woke up from the surgery. I was dying of thirst, but couldn't drink anything. I was in pain and couldn't tell which hand help the morphine button and which held the nurse's call button. I couldn't understand why my morphine wasn't working and how come those nurses kept coming in saying "Yes?"!!!

What aftercare support group/program do you have? How helpful/important is this?

I live too far away to attend the support group at the hospital. I am considering starting my own in our town because there are a lot of people here that are having it done and I've started getting calls from friends-of-friends who got my number from "so-and-so" because they had just had the surgery and have questions. If I ever have questions, I can call Dr. Thompson or the Center For Surgical Weight Loss in Whittier, CA.

What is your scar like? Is this what you expected?

My scar ran from just below my breatbone to just above my navel. I expected this, it was all explained to me before the surgery. It's almost faded out now and just sort of looks like a stretch mark. I had a tummy tuck done 2 months ago and that also took away about 3 inches of the scar.

Please describe any plateau experiences you have had since surgery.

I would plateau for about a week or two beginning about the 4th month, then abruptly lose 5 pounds. Then I would continue to lose on an almost daily basis, then hit another plateau. They didn't last long. I just continued eating as I had been and exercising.

Do you notice people treating you any differently now?

Definitely! I get treated with more respect and even feel that people almost take me more seriously now. My husband is a lot more attentive now. He always was, but even more so now that I get a lot of attention from other men. My kids even treat me differently. My youngest son was just thrilled to death the first time he hugged me and his arms reached all the way around!