How did you first find out about bariatric surgery and what were your initial impressions of it?

I learned about it through reading online about different weight loss techniques. As a typical fat person, I was always searching for the magic pill to melt my fat away, and many companies offered such products with false claims so I was surfing for more fad diets to be suckered into. I came across Obesityhelp.com and the rest is history. I have since read and researched everything about the surgery and the surgeons in my area. I did this for almost 2 years before deciding it was for me. I wish I had decided earlier and I could already be on the other side, but I wasn't 100% ready then, and you have to know everything about it and be completely ready for it to even begin the process. And now I know I am at that point. My initial impression of the surgery was skeptical, as many people are of it. I read all the success stories but also have been reminded of the horror stories as well-everyone I tell about my upcoming surgery always knew someone who had a relative who knew someone who died on the table from this surgery, but through my research I have found peace with those statements. People have died, I know this, but most of them had severe complications with other problems they were already experiencing before even having the surgery. That would definately put you in a higher risk group. I am know I could die from it, but I also know I am in god's hands. If it is my time to go then so be it, but I am looking at it in a more positive light. That I will be given a chance to have the life I never lived in the first 26 years of my life, and that is how I view it. That I may now extend my natural life by years and have the time to spend with my family and have children, and grow old with them. That is how I see it. My inital impression was skeptical, however, I am fully educated now and know what I am doing and I am confident in that decision.

Describe your experience with getting insurance approval for surgery. What advice, if any, do you have for other people in this stage?

I have United Health Care and I was approved in 2 weeks. I wrote a letter to them pouring my heart out and listed all my medical and emotional issues and the reasonings for the surgery. My surgeon also wrote a letter of necessity and sent that to the insurance company. I called the insurance company almost every day to check the status and finally, 2 weeks to the day, was granted my bypass. The key is I think writing a heart-felt letter, having your Dr or Surgeon write a letter of necessity, and pursuing the insurance company often.

What was your first visit with your surgeon like? How can people get the most out of this meeting?

The first visit with my surgeon was fairly quick. I had researched everything, I had all my paperwork with me (diet history, etc.) and had my list of questions ready to ask him. He answered most in his explanation of the surgery, and the risks and complications, but any left over I asked after. He was very thorough and stressed the fact that there are many risks and he wanted me to be clear on that. I think you should have read everything on Obesityhelp.com and have your questions ready when you have your first visit. You should also have written your diet history down explaining the date of the diet, the type of diet, the length of time you were on it, the amount you weighed before the diet and after the diet (calculating your loss/gain). This helps the doctor see your attempts and can determine if you are a candidate for the surgery. You should also have discussed it with your regular doctor to see their opinion and make sure they will be there for you with your after care. You will need to have regular visits to the doctor after your surgery so they should know what you are doing.

What made you finally decide to have the surgery?

I finally had the time to do it, I was layed off from work and had the time to get it done. I had already researched everything about it so I knew the steps and how to begin. As soon as I was ready I jumped in and began the process. I wanted to give myself adequate recovery time and not have to stress about work, and the perfect opportunity for that presented itself to me.

How did you decide which proceedure to have?

I researched all the types, and decided the most popular and most successful was the way to go. I wanted to have the procedure done laproscopically so I found a surgeon specifically skilled in advanced laproscopic surgery. I decided on the rny proximal because of the results it has had and it seems to be the right type for me.

What fears did you have about having complications or even dying from from the surgery, and what would you tell other people having the same fears now?

I have huge fears about dying. My surgery is in two weeks and not a day goes by that I don't think about that. I think that is completely normal though, and expected for someone having such a dramatic life changing procedure done. I am coping with that by writing letters to all my loved ones, should something happen to me. This gives me piece of mind that if something does happen, I was able to say all the things I wanted to say to these people. But that really is in the back of my mind, because I am really concentrating on how many more things I will be able to do after the surgery. How much more healthy and mobile I will be, and I won't be restricted as to what activites I can or can't do. These are the positive thoughts that are keeping me focused on the future. I am going to get through the surgery with flying colors and I know this. The letters are a small piece of reassurance I have that puts my nerves at ease.

How did your family and friends react to your decision? Would you have communicated anything differently if you could now? How supportive were they after your surgery?

My parents were upset becuase they knew the risks but they were very supportive after. They were there for the surgery itself and they visited me often at home to make sure I had everything I needed. My mother was the most scared but she knew I had to do something. My weight was out of control and she feared me dying at 40 from a heart attack. Now they are all very pleased with the results and are very happy for me and my health.

How did your employer/supervisor react to your decision? What did you tell him/her? How long were you out of work?

I was unemployed at the time so things were fine on that end. I took a full 3 months to recover and then jumped back into a new job (65 lbs lighter) and felt great. Now over 6 months post op people here at my new job are starting to ask me "have you lost weight?" and I have lost over 60 lbs since working here so I simply answer "I have lost some, thank you for noticing!". A few close friends I told the whole story too and even showed them the pics I keep with me at all times of my at 320lbs. Noone beleives them when they see them but I keep them to remind myself of what I was and that I need to keep myself focused at all times.

What was your stay in the hospital like? How long where you there? What things are most important to bring?

I went in Wednesday AM and was home by Friday night. I brought slippers (I didnt need), a robe (I didnt need), toiletries like shampoo and conditioner, toothbrush toothpaste (they gave me one there), deoderant, extra underwear and socks, extra blanket in case I was cold, fan incase I was hot (I SO needed that!!),etc. Really I would have been fine with nothing because they would have provided me with anything I asked for. They were so accomodating at Roger Williams.

Did you have any complications from the surgery? If so, how did you deal with them?

Yes, I had an infection at my drain site which led to severe pain and ending up back in the ER the next week after Surgery. I was given a CT scan and other tests and was treated with antibiotics. It took me about 6 weeks to feel completely like ME again. I was in alot of pain and took a lot of pain drugs to deal with it. I also had a weird burning sensation in my side that stuck around for a few weeks but that was just my insides healing, it eventually subsided. Even with all the complications I would do it again in a heartbeat, no question about it.

In the weeks after you got your surgery date, how did you feel? How did you cope with any anxiety you might have felt?

I went from my inital visit with my surgeon to surgury in about 4 weeks so I had no time to stress about it! The days prior to surgery I vented to alot of people about wondering if I was doing the right thing but I knew I was. I was also concerned about death but I wrote letters to everyone I loved and also had my will and POA done up-all my bases were covered and I was packed a week before I went in. I was so ready!

What aftercare support group/program do you have? How helpful/important is this?

I attend two support group meetings-one with patients of Dr. Roye and Dr. Harrington at RI Hospitan and another at Roger WIlliams with patients of my surgeon, Dr. Pohl. I find the one at RIH very helpful and fun-it is interactive and beneficial to me. I find the one at RWH to have a lot to be desired. The best part is meeting up with everyone after the meeting because we are not allowed to talk during the meeting. It is run by a very unproffessional therapist who commands attention from us and scolds us like school children if we make a peep out of line. Hoepfully though that will change in the future.

What is your scar like? Is this what you expected?

I have 5 small wounds, no more than 1 inch each. They have faded considerable since surgery 6+ months ago. Once I start to tan (if my stomach eventually sees the sun!) I think they will fade away almost completely.

Please describe any plateau experiences you have had since surgery.

I have had many plateaus-and it occurs when I get lazy with the basics-I just kick my butt into gear and exercise more, drink ALL my water (I try to drink 128 oz a day) and get plenty of food and protein in. When you don't eat enough you don't lose too so you have to intake the right kinds of food. Plateaus are stressful but inevitable. So I deal with them and move on.

Do you notice people treating you any differently now?

Hell yes-before I was like a circus freak, or at least that is how I felt. People stared at me, made comments. It was like they never saw someone SO huge. Maybe that was just how I interpreted peoples looks and glances but I know what they were thinking. Now, men look at me different, people treat me different. I am more respected and taken more seriously. I was the same person before but my excess weight was holding me back. I think I built up more confidence now too which is visible to others, who in turn respond more positivly to me. There are the people (men) who never paid any attention to me before at 318lbs but now after I lost 120 suddenly talk to me more. I do not hold this against them as people but I would never take any of their advances to the next level. The people who loved me before and continue to love me are the ones I plan on staying with forever.