Bryan A.

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Obesity & Me

Describe your behavioral and emotional battle with weight control before learning about bariatric surgery.

I struggled tremendously with my weight since the age of four. One of my earliest memories was fearing scoliosis testing at the nurse's office because I would have to take my shirt off in front of other boys. Each year, my weight would increase, and it seemed like it would never end. During high school, I decided that I had to put an end to this cycle. I tried many fad diets, over-the-counter pills/potions, structured diet and exercise programs, and even physician supervised plans. No matter what I did, I was always met with the same result - failure. Whether I was starving myself, restricting certain foods/food groups, or gorging myself on others, I always felt like I was depriving myself of something and therefore missing out. As a 306 pound teenager, it was hard to imagine ever being able to life a life where I was in control of my weight. I felt like I would never succeed and that temptation would always get the best of me. Feeling like a failure was a daily struggle and caused me to distance myself from friends, family and social gatherings. Eating in front of strangers caused me noticeable anxiety. On the rare occasion friends could get me out to a restaurant, I would request a secluded booth and would position myself with my back against a wall to feel less vulnerable. It allowed me to watch everyone else instead of them watching me. I didn't date, nor did I think anybody would date me even if I tried. I was convinced everybody was as preoccupied about my weight as I was, but in reality, I was my own worst enemy.

What was (is) the worst thing about being overweight?

The worst thing about being overweight is the embarrassment. The embarrassment you experience when you can't fit into your airline seat, when you have to "roll" out of your car, when you can not fit into the roller coaster in the amusement park.

If you have had weight loss surgery already, what things do you most enjoy doing now that you weren't able to do before?

Walking into a clothing store and finding my size on the rack, doing yard work in the dead of summer and portraying confidence in myself when trying new things.

How did you first find out about bariatric surgery and what were your initial impressions of it?

I found out about bariatric surgery while watching the Discovery Health Channel. I immediately thought of it as a life saving procedure and that it was my "saving grace." However, after mentioning it to friends, I thought I might not be big enough to qualify. This is the only time in my life, I was glad to be as heavy as I was. It turns out, I was well above the obesity data, I just happened to carry my weight well.

Describe your experience with getting insurance approval for surgery. What advice, if any, do you have for other people in this stage?

I feel insurance approval is the biggest hurdle you will have to face in your decision to have weight loss surgery. It is a very long and drawn out process. You will have to have a psychological evaluation, prove that you have tried other methods of weight loss, and prove that you really are suffering because of your obesity. As hard as this process may seem at times, it is necessary and it is required that you do not get intimidated or discouraged. If you are denied, there are appeals processes. The best advice I can give is to be patient, VERY patient. Update: It turns out I had no problem with insurance approval. I had an approval letter within 4 days of the insurance company receiving my faxed request. I love United Healthcare!

What was your first visit with your surgeon like? How can people get the most out of this meeting?

At first I was nervous, thinking that he might say I was too young or not fat enough. But after meeting my surgeon, all of my fears came to rest. The office visit was very pleasant and informative. He and his staff answered all of my questions and catered to my needs. Others can get the most out of this meeting by taking a skeptical friend with them to their appointment. You yourself have already decided that this is a good option for you, but they haven't. They will have questions to ask, and they will be able to open your eyes to things you couldn't see. At the end, if they are convinced, or if they have no defense for "not liking it," then you know for sure that you should proceed. Another thing that may help is if you have some documents ready when you go. For instance, most doctors require a letter from your primary care physician, medical records for the past five years from ALL doctors, a history of weight loss attempts, and a list of medical problems associated with your obesity. If you have these at your first visit, the process of approval will be much faster.

What made you finally decide to have the surgery?

My final decision came with the fact that I could not walk up a flight of stairs without getting winded. My lower-back pain during shifts at work from lugging around this gut all day. The knee joint pain I had from all the pressure. But the one deciding factor was when I flew back home from a family vacation and sat in the middle seat on an airplane and realized how big I actually was. When I had to stretch the seat beat to the biggest size, when my sides had to squeeze past the arm rests, when the tray came down and hit my stomach, and when I moved and the people next to me got annoyed.

How did you decide which proceedure to have?

My surgeon decided for me, with my approval.

What fears did you have about having complications or even dying from from the surgery, and what would you tell other people having the same fears now?

I have absolutely no fears about the surgery. Then again, I have never been scared of dying. I figure that I can either die quickly with anesthesia during surgery, or I can die slowly by being obese. Anything can always happen in life, and no matter how much worrying you do before hand, it is not going to stop it. You can worry about dying or complications right up until the time you wake up from surgery, but it will not change the outcome. You are only stressing yourself out by being nervous. The power is in your doctor's hands. Have confidence in him/her.

How did your family and friends react to your decision? Would you have communicated anything differently if you could now? How supportive were they after your surgery?

The majority of my friends and family were very nervous about me having surgery. They had the normal fears about complications, as will most people. But the more you explain and the more they educate themselves, the more accepting they become.

How did your employer/supervisor react to your decision? What did you tell him/her? How long were you out of work?

I work as a server/bartender for a restaurant chain. My schedule is very flexible, and will not be greatly impacted by my decision.
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