Kind of a vent

ok so I have changed this post since you all think I am a horrible parent. I have 4 children ages 9 to 16 three are mine one is my BF. however I raised him from age 3. I love them all very much however when I get home from my surgery on Saturday I do not want the kids home so I can get the rest I need. I sent two of my boys to friends houses from day of surgery to Sunday so it will not be to stressful on my BF since I have teens and they seem to bunt heads with my BF. The hole your not my Daddy thing. I did this so that he would not be stressed out and so that I would have quite time when I got home from the hospital. I also asked him if he could send his son home to his Mother on Saturday so that when I get home I can rest.MY BF is pissy at me for this. My step son is the youngest in our home and the oldest in his Mothers. When with us he acts like a baby well cause he is the baby of the family. He is a whinny child and his voice carries in our home it gets under my skin at times and all I want is rest when I get home. Is it wrong for me to ask my BF to send his son home a day early so I can get rest??? We have him from Friday after school to Sunday night normally and then every Tuesday and Thursday from after school till the next day.

I think if he bugs you now...its going to get worse. I hope you dont take this the wrong way....but your an adult....he is a child. In this case you need to be the bigger person.... He gets to see his child a couple days a week. And your asking him not to because you dislike kids this age group? ya...its a *****y move. When you want to sleep go in your room. Close the door. Put on some music to drown out the noise in the house.

If that doesnt work get a hotel room for the weekend.

Juls

Not that what I think really matters but yes you are not being kind, and if I was your bf I would ask you to stay at a near by hotel or in the hospital for an extra day. Sorry to sound so harsh but kids matter and feeling like you belong and are loved regardless of your voice age or stage of development is way more important in my opinion 

Congrats on your upcoming surgery!!! 

Please remember you asked our opinions... not trying to sound rude or anything of the kind .. :-) 

Your boyfriend has an obligation to his son. You are asking him to choose you over his son because you dont like his son at this age. I would suggest get a pair of ear plugs when you want to rest and keep peace in the family. Remember he is only 9 years old and this is what 9 year olds do. 

yikes.. this is going to come off as mean but wow this whole vent is quite childish. To not care for yours or any other kids for 6 years, I feel sorry for those children! I almost could not believe what I was reading.. are you for real?

My just 11 year old drives me crazy sometimes but I would never think of sending him away for the weekend.  Maybe you could try and turn the way you feel about him around ?  Sometimes when my boy is making me nuts I ask him about his day, get him to hang out with me or switch up my own attitude.  Maybe in the end it's not about the boy.  Are you super stressed about the surgery or your BF or something else ?  Sometimes I have to check myself when I am getting picky about something and really figure out why.  1/2 the time it's not even my childs doing.  It's my own.

Good luck to you ! 

Ok well I guess I came off the wrong way with this for all of you to see me as a horrible person. I really am not. you need to understand that year the ages between 6 and 12 are not my fav. ages but I raised my kids and my step son and love them all very much. I never once told them I did not like them at this age nor neglect them at all. you guys make me sound like a bad mother all because I dont want to be bothered when I first get home from surgery. I ran a home day care center and worked in one for over 10 years. I love children I just don't care for the stage from 6 to 12., With boys any ways. At this time i find boys need and want Daddy more then Mommy. And as for my step son We do not only have him on weekends we have him two days through the week too. My BF has a crazy ex and I have done nothing but support him when it came to 4 years of court fighting for his son. I am the one who trained him and taught him how to read and write. I love my step son as if he was my own. I really do not think that I am being a ***** for asking for a few days of quiet in my house that I pay for. As for me getting a room in a motel and not being able to stay in the comfort of my own home is wrong. Yes he is only 9 but one day without his Dad so I can get rest is not a lot to ask for. Besides his own mother calls me up all the time to take him extra days when she is to tired or she has had a bad day cause she has two other children as well. I will drop what I am doing and always pick him up. I know that I wrote this on here and I appreciate the feed back but I thought you guys are here would not to judge like that and if you actually knew me you would know that you judged me all wrong. Yes I may be a ***** to ask my BF not to have his son one day but what about all the times he needs a brake or he go's to work and I take care of his son??????. I would never asked him to choose me over his son. It is one day. I am actually hurt that you guys be little me this bad. I thought you guys would be more understanding that I will need my rest after my surgery. Someone please tell me how to delete this post. you guys could of said ya you are kind of being a ***** but we understand you need rest after surgery but no you all bash me as a parent no understanding at all. You try having 4 boys from 9 to 16 in your home with out stress or some kind or fighting. I AM JUST ASKING FOR ONE DAY!!!!!!!

You cannot expect strangers to know you based on your one post about how you find your 9 year old step son's voice to annoying and don't want him around.  You asked.  These people, (complete strangers who don't know you from a hole in the ground), gave you an objective opinion based on what you told them.  Suck it up.  If you wanted a more accurate answer from someone who knows you and your history, you should have asked someone who knows you and your history of loving and caring for children.