Looking in the mirror
Tonight I took my daughter shopping for some shorts. It was really difficult...she is really tiny and so we went to Old Navy. Not only did I notice that everyone in the store was very thin but when I sat by the change room I saw myself in mirror. I saw myself looking so overweight. the rolls, thick ankles, dimples on my legs and swollen looking face.....quite frankly it was down right depressing. I try to keep telling myself keep mind on what the surgery will achieve...just sometimes the wait feels like forever.
Thanks for listening...just needed to talk. 
Referral Feb 2012, Orientation at Guelph Nov. 29/12, RN, SW and NUT Feb. 13/12, 2nd RN, SW and NUT April 26/13, Dr. Agarwal May 7/13, SW May 22/13. HW 334lbs, CW 269 lbs. Post-op nutrition course August 1/13, Dr. Jules Foute Nelong Sept 9/13, PATTS Oct 9/13, Opti Oct 16/13, Surgery Oct 30/13.
I know exactly what you mean - some mirror I walk by and say... "I am not that big am I?", and then walk by the next mirror and say "Wow is that really me?" and by the time I get to the 3rd mirror I am so upset that that really isn't just a bed mirror that is what I have come to look like!
I actually said to my sister today that I can't even picture being small - I have no idea what I will look like how it will feel and how It will change the way I act/feel.
Sometimes I just don't believe it will happen...
But we have all been there and are all working towards changing it - so start looking in the mirror and taking mental pictures and tell yourself - I want to remember myself like this because it won't last much longer and I need to have something to compare to. You will have that many more small victories/NSV's - If you have lived this way your whole life then the wait is well worth it even if it does feel like it is dragging. Looks like you are post surgery already so just be patient and follow the rules you will be there in no time!
RNY - December 10 2013 Dr Lindsay Toronto's Saint Joseph Hospital Toronto
Not post-op yet...but thank you...good to know other people feel the same thing.
Referral Feb 2012, Orientation at Guelph Nov. 29/12, RN, SW and NUT Feb. 13/12, 2nd RN, SW and NUT April 26/13, Dr. Agarwal May 7/13, SW May 22/13. HW 334lbs, CW 269 lbs. Post-op nutrition course August 1/13, Dr. Jules Foute Nelong Sept 9/13, PATTS Oct 9/13, Opti Oct 16/13, Surgery Oct 30/13.
on 6/21/13 11:15 am
I feel the same way ... when I get dressed in the morning i sit on my bed which is right in front of the mirror... I cant stand to look at myself. I feel if I cant stand to look at myself what do others think. But you know what ... Our day will come my friend when we will want to look at ourselves and say ... Damn I look good. Keep smiling and our time will come Hugs x0x0
Thank you Lynn 
Referral Feb 2012, Orientation at Guelph Nov. 29/12, RN, SW and NUT Feb. 13/12, 2nd RN, SW and NUT April 26/13, Dr. Agarwal May 7/13, SW May 22/13. HW 334lbs, CW 269 lbs. Post-op nutrition course August 1/13, Dr. Jules Foute Nelong Sept 9/13, PATTS Oct 9/13, Opti Oct 16/13, Surgery Oct 30/13.
You and me both!!!! Hope you are having a good weekend
Referral Feb 2012, Orientation at Guelph Nov. 29/12, RN, SW and NUT Feb. 13/12, 2nd RN, SW and NUT April 26/13, Dr. Agarwal May 7/13, SW May 22/13. HW 334lbs, CW 269 lbs. Post-op nutrition course August 1/13, Dr. Jules Foute Nelong Sept 9/13, PATTS Oct 9/13, Opti Oct 16/13, Surgery Oct 30/13.
