One week post-op

I haven't posted yet on here, so here it goes:

One week ago I had my surgery. The two days leading into it were tough. Clear liquids and I was miserable. Have surgery, come out in a lot of pain, and the dry heaving for 24 hours was the worst. I literally was thinking what did I do to myself? Totally in full on regret mode. I had to keep telling myself, this is so I can have a precious baby, this is so my shunt will work 20 years, not 2 years. I haven't had pain meds since Tuesday, after that first day the pain was tolerable, if at all (I have developed a high pain threshold as I was in 8-10 pain for 18 months with my Intracranial Hypertension). The nurse constantly checked my blood sugar, constantly asking me if I was diabetic, and then would be surprised that I wasn't had really low good numbers, surprised that my blood pressure was super low (100/76) and would comment that they thought just by looking at me I should have high blood pressure. Everyone has commented about how well I am doing since the surgery, I walk like I haven't had surgery. To me this surgery was mild compared to having a medical device implanted in your spine. That hurt a whole lot more and I am just now to the point of full recovery from that. Needless to say, pain wise, sleeping, walking, all of that is relatively ok for me. My issue is not being able to munch on something for my meals. The protein drinks were just getting to be too much to choke down, and when I reread everything and went to my post-op class, and reread Weight Loss Surgery for dummies, I realized that creamed soup meant pureed soup, that milk was ok, and when I feel the need to have something crunchy, a popsicle or ice chips do the work for me. The other issue, went out to breakfast with family on Thursday, went out to breakfast with family on Saturday, family ordered Pizza on Saturday evening, I didn't go to breakfast on Sunday (why torture myself any more), and then both in-laws and my family came over on Sunday and BBQ and ate, dear lord I just want to lick some food so I can taste it. Husband has offered to kiss me after he eats so I can at least taste it. I did take a protein shake with me to Denny's on saturday and drank that while everyone ate, but I find myself just staring at everyone's food while they talk to me. I would be happy with just eggs, really. I have always loved scrambled eggs, so I would be ok with that, but this whole only liquids thing is getting to me. Luckily Thursday I can start on mushy foods, I am grateful that I don't have to do liquids as long as some people are having to do them. I haven't cheated, and feel like I am cheating when i eat my pureed soup. I have added unflavored protein powders to the soups so I get my proteins in. I don't quite make it to the 64 oz of liquids but I get close, and stop when I just can't put any more in my stomach by the end of the day. My body is telling me when it is just too much. And my starbucks Passion Iced Tea has saved me, it has never tasted so good to me and is better than plain water right now. Do I still regret this? I have my moments where I would give anything to have to some chips and salsa, or whatever someone is eating in my presence, and then I look at my progress, and my goals, and realize that this was the best thing I did for myself, and one day I will get to enjoy those things again in moderation.

I am two months out and went through a lot of the psychological issues you are experiencing. Easter and then mother's day right after my surgery. It was tough, but it quickly gets better. It's normal to second guess yourself on why you had the surgery. But I see that you've had a few obesity related issues, so there are your reasons. What would be next for us? Wheelchairs?

I think you will be fine. This is the tough part. Every week you will see improvements. The liquid phase is awful. Well, it was for me anyways. This too shall pass.

Hang in there!

Thanks, for me it was a lifetime in bed due to severe headaches and possibly going blind. Although my weight gain has been due to side effects of the brain disease and the PCOS, which then gaining the weight only made things worse, but so very much out of my control, I now feel hope. Hope for something different in life, and I may still get the occasional severe headache, I really shouldn't have problems until my shunt gives up. It has been three years since I have been able to lose like this, and finally now I can. So grateful for this 2nd chance, and grateful that my vision has been saved. 

The liquids is killing me, okay not literally, I would just kill for some variety, and to actually chew something besides popsicles and jello.

I'm a 2 weeks and 4 days out. The 1st 2 weeks were pure hell and I was regretting my decision as well. I have a large family so every night when they were cooking and eating whatever they wanted, I was crying and having severe "head hunger". I was miserable. It's a lot to go through at first. You're trying to heal and learn your new stomach and fight cravings and work out the gas. I ended up in the hospital last week for a couple of days. I had gas trapped in my neck and chest. I was also dehydrated and had a UTI. But, while I was there my doctor bumped me to soft food and all the sudden, I felt much better. The last of my incisions was finally healing, I could move around without much discomfort and I was able to eat different foods. Now of course I'm bored with my food list again, so I'm on the hunt for other things to eat. 

I have to keep reminding myself that it isn't going to be like this forever. I will always have to be careful with what I eat, but later if I want a kolache or a hamburger, I can have it. Scaled down of course, but I'll be able to have it. I don't mind giving it up for now. I no longer regret my decision. It gets easier and easier every day. :)

Good luck to you!