Surgery on Tuesday at 7:30am and I am FREAKING OUT!!!

I have had major stress and anxiety over this surgery since day one.  I'm fine with the pre-op and post-op stuff and know what may and may not happen and though I have reservations like everyone else, I'm ok with that.  But for me it's the actual surgery that I can't get past in my head.  I'm a little over a day away and it'****ting me bad now - I've been crying on and off all day and starting to think about cancelling. But I know  I CANNOT!!!  

I think the huge hurdle for me is that my mom went into the hospital in 1999 for a minor procedure and surgery and on the day we were supposed to bring her home she died from a blot clot that traveled from her leg into her lungs.  Granted, we did eventually find out that it was doctor/hospital error because of things they did not do properly.  Then two years ago my brother had knee replacement surgery and had a blot clots 2 weeks post-op. He's fine now but had a tough 6-8 months. My docs of course know all of this and have assured me they will be giving me anti-clotting meds before and after surger just in case.  Also did some blood work to check clotting (not sure what exactly) and said everything looked fine. 

With that said, I am still scared to death that I won't make it throught the surgery. That I will leave my son alone with no one but my 82 year old father. When those thoughts go through my head I just lose it.  I know I have to have this surgery, I know it will give me MORE time with my son, I know it will extend my life because I HAVE TO get this weight off.  I have battled being overweight since middle-school and tried everything, with some success followed by gaining all back plus more as most do.  I'm doing great on the pre-op diet - over 15 pounds lost in 12 days.  I just can't get these fears of the surgery itself out of my head!!!!  

Sorry if I sound whiney or am going on and on, but I had to get this out - at least writing it helps a little bit.  Any thoughts or suggestions on how any of you got past this (if you dealt with this issue) would be greatly appreciated.  I'm afraid I'll go wabbling out of the hospital Tuesday morning out of sheer panic and fear and ruin the rest of my life.  

Thanks for listening! Mishie

Since you know of the family history just make sure your dr knows and they will take care of you.  I know you are nervous, my surgery is 10 days away and I am a basket case already.  But from everyone I have talked to that has had this- they have no regrets and are much happier.  So remember that as you go in for surgery- at least that is what I am telling myself.  My neighbor swears by it and says she wishes she had done it sooner.  So I am trusting that they cant all be wrong and lying!  Good luck to you!

Deep breaths.  Relax.  You will be fine.  You do have to walk, walk, walk. and drink, drink, drink.  The more you walk the less chance of blood clots.  You will get blood thinners in the hospital.  And you are doing this for your health and to be around for your child.  Keep us posted after your surgery.

Oh hun.  I wish I could tell you I know exactly how you feel.  But I cant.  Although I to am having surgery on Tues (mine at 7am)  I havent been through or have the history you do.  I can tell you that because of your history your surgeon will be paying extra special attention to you and do everything to prevent clots.    My son had a stroke as a result of a clot going to his brain after his surgery and he is 13 and had 4 more surgeries since then.  His Dr gives him meds during and after the surgery to prevent clots and thin his blood.   I am going to be including you in my prayers and if you need someone to talk to feel free to message me.
 

I don't know if this will help you or not.. but the surgery itself is a breeze. They have evaluated your risks..and they will take the proper steps to keep you safe. You will likely be given a strong sedative that will make you calmer, then put under.. you will wake up feeling like just a second passed. It really is that simple. The pre & post stuff is the work, the surgery isn't! This was my first major surgery (tonsils as a kid).. I was very anxious.. it all worked out fine. You will do great, just let them do their thing, until it's over- you're just along for the ride.

remember this is the best thing you can do for your self. Relax you will do great. I felt the same way as most of us did but you will do great.

Hello friend! I just had surgery last Tuesday and like they all said, you will be fine! I was freaking out the week before as well because I am a RN in a surgical ICU and I know what all can go wrong...sounds like you do as well...but remember...you are in good hands, the doctors are doing all of the right things for you to make a positive change in your life and in the end you will thank your self for making this wonderful decision.  My surgery wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it was going to be...I was very worried as well about clots but I got lovenox promptly and the leg squeezers (pneumo boots) were placed right away so the chances are minimal.  Breathe and relax and thing positivly...you are going to do great! 

Hugs.... before you know it, you will be three months out and telling people like you to relax and that it will be ok.

 Thank you all so much for your kind words, advice and support.  I'm still scared, I don't think that will go away, but reading your comments have helped tremendously.  I will be keeping them in mind over the next day whenever I start to get those negative thoughts sneaking in.  

The support on OH is truly a blessing.  Don't know what I would have done without this the past several weeks - or the months to come. But I love knowing there are so many here to offer support, help and prayers.  Thanks to all of you.  

I have surgery on Tuesday at 7:30 am too. I am awfully excited and scared. It is really normal to have these feelings, this is a big deal. I was scared am scared about leaving my kids if something goes wrong but what I did that made me feel better was I wrote them letters just in case. IF something happens then I can say goodbye and such, if not then I can shred them. I really doubt anything will go wrong but it made me feel better, and that's why I did it. Not saying you should just saying. I am nervous and antsy and can't sleep. We are leaving at 3:30 or 4 am in the morning on Tues. I'll pray for you. The doctors have your family history and will take all the necessary precautions, breathe...it will be over before you know it and you'll be on the loser's bench. Good luck. Sorry about the ramble, a little bit of a basketcase right now.