1 month out Please help..........

So I'm one month out Wednesday...I had to travel for work all week so I'm just posting now.

Travel was pretty awful with the new sleeve, I only see my co workers like 3 times a year because I travel to 2 diferent offices every six weeks so I split my time between the two. Anyway I didn't feel the need to tell people I Never see about my surgery...so I just offered up the galbladder removal as the reason I'm such a "freak".

As some of you remember I asked about the stall that hit me at day 9...its still here. I went into surgery at 279, today I weigh 264. I lost 15lbs the first 9 days and NOTHING since. I'm really frustrated and sad. Other than this week I've done everything by the book, this week was tough but I tried to eat mostly fish and crab. I didn't have my scale all week so I was really hoping the stall would break and I'd see a drop this morning but nope...so much for the honeymoon period...

I don't even know what to say or do, I feel defeated and now depressed. I can't eat more than 4 bites of anything and then I burp continuously for 20 minutes and look like an idiot... All these things I could sooooooooo handle IF I was losing weight, which I'm not.

TOM did show up tuesday, so I'm hoping its responsible that and the salt in restaurant prepared foods, but to not see any loss in 3 weeks after having 90% of my stomach removed really really really breaks my heart... I'm so disapointed with this and don't even know what to do or say to anyone...I think I'm sinking or drowning or something. Thats what I feel like...was this a mistake????????????????????????? Any advice would really be appreciated I just don't know what to do...

I hear that you are sad, blue, uncomfortable, and things do not look like the brochure.  That is  a bummer indeed.

But riddle me this, joker what CAN you do?

You can cry and sit and never do another thing to help yourself get to where you want.

You can cry and begrudgingly do some of the things to help get you where you want.

You can cry and get it over with and plan out your BEHAVIORS as your goals that WILL get you where you want.

You have had major surgery.  You are on your period.  You, whether you see it on the scale or not, have hormones from fat loss swirling through your body.  All of these things are true, but they do not *have* to dictate how you act, or make you second guess your choice.

You *do* know what to do.  Keep following the instructions you were given.  Maybe if food is bugging your tum, you should back up to mushy stuff.  Chewing papya enzymes after each meal may help.

Look, crying is what it is, and you can EITHER spend your time being bummed out and looking at everything that IS NOT happening (that you cannot control anyway), or you can get your plan together for how you can control the things you can (food choices, how you move, see if different food, papaya enzymes will help with the burping, eat 3 bites instead of 4) and you WILL get results.

YOU cannot control your weight loss.  You *CAN* control your behavior.  You cannot control when your outcome will be. You CAN control the amount of stress you put on yourself and how much you talk yourself into or out of good choices.

You may feel like it was a mistake, and I get that. But what you DO is going to make or break you.

Like my bubs says, you cannot unpee in the pool. 

You WILL probably have mood swings, this is not uncommon.  Oil of evening primrose helped me, but acting on your feelings RIGHT NOW, and repeating self defeating thoughts to you is not going to get you what you want.  ITs going to get you more of what you do not want girlie.

You CAN do this.  You ARE doing this!  I get that you have the blues, but do yourself a favor and take the time to learn to self soothe or distract yourself.  

So, wallowing can be helpful for a moment, but then getting up and making a plan and focusing on what you CAN do is going to get you to where you wanna be!

You are doing this! 
 

There is no GIVE UP gene in me, I am trying to abide by all the rules and make myself successful. Honestly I am...

Just seems so crazy to be following all the rules and doing what I'm told and still not see the results I so desperately want to see.

All the oddity's I'm going through, the burping, the constant hiccup's the weird looks from the waitress everytime the ask did you not like your food...all that stuff would just be hunky dorie if the mo fo scale would move in a downward direction...

This is just my cry for some advice. I'm going to up the incline on the treadmill today and see if some more sweat will help a sister out, but I was just seeing if anyone else was or had gone through this...

Brandilyn, thanks for ALWAYS replying and always being supportive I really really appreciate it.

I may well **** you off in the future, because it can happen :} But do remember that my heart IS always to be helpful!!

Hiccups are a nerve thing.  Some folks get them (and sneezes) when they have eaten too much (even my non surgeriezed mama! She calls them glutton sneezes :} ). And also, asking for a box and putting most of your meal IN the box is going to keep them from asking questions. Its easier than hassling or explaining yourself, I find.

You WILL see what you want - but please start NOW in not letting the scale dictate everything.  You are an experiment of one!  Just write down your weight and say "hmmm.. interesting" and then go do something good for you! 

A WHOLE lot of this is a total clustermindfuck babygirl. And this DOES NOT stop with maintenance, or losing 10, 20, 50, 73.8 pounds! 

And please this.  Please get on the treadmill because its good for your muscles and your heart.  IF you lose some weight tomorrow, then HOORAY!! But please watch yourself because

(course, you know this is me saying "these are my danger spots - if you are like me this may be a danger for you too! not saying this IS how you are!!)

Because a tendency for me *see disclaimer above* HAS BEEN to crank up exercise to try and manipulate my weight.  But here - a binge is a binge is a binge.  I have been a person who ate way too much (I get you are not doing this, this is just an example of danger) and then spent way too much UNPRODUCTIVE time beating the **** out of myself with exercise to "make up" for over indulgences.

For me *see disclaimer* a HUGE part of this journey is LEARNING moderation.  Even now folks will say "I ate ****pots of X and so I am going to spend 2 hours working out" and that is kind of what we were trying to get away from yea?  Binging and purging? 

So, get on the treadmill because its part of your pattern, and its really GOOD for your heart and your muscles and quite honestly for a mental state!  But do not set yourself up to be mad with exercise too, because X + Y does not equal Z in this gig!  Weight loss and learning and growth are not always linear!

Learning to get zen with the way things are is good!  Getting zen is not the same as not striving for another something!  Its just not letting what is NOW get in the way of what you are working for, you know? 

But you do know!  I bet you know this logically in your work, in raising your family, all sorts of things! 

You are welcome girlie!  And the mental ****e may well be the most challenging thing of all of this, but ONCE YOU WORK IT OUT - you will see it was SO worth it! And it spreads to everything! 

I have an incline workout that I did (its 30 minutes) that I am glad to send you the word document for.

You can also find it here in this link I am going to give you, but if you want it in a word document, just email me and I will get it to you!  *edit to actually, you know.. add the link.  :}

http://www.obesityhelp.com/forums/VSG/4245269/How-in-the-wor ld/page,2/#34896635

You are going to get advice - but honestly the best advice I can give you is this.

Be sweet.  Learn to be an experiment of one.  Do not take the scale personally.  Change your mind. Keep on making your behaviors ones that WILL facilitate the outcome you want!

Be good to you!  A year goes by in a flash, but a Moody Friday can last forever!  :} 

Do not hurt em hammer!  :} 

I'm 2 weeks ahead of you Surgery 8/1/11.  in the first 12 days i lost 0.  at my 6 week weight in i lost 8lbs.  here is what i do.  i weigh my food i do the 600-800 cals, 30-40 carbs, it's usually less. My protein is at about 90gms. i work out. in other words i do everything right.  

Here's what i know.  It's really ******g disappointing but it is what it is.  It is not going in so eventually it will decide to come off.  I went from eating about 3,000 cals 2 months ago to eating 800 with high protein and lots of water.  i am not historically a slow loser, i can do 8lbs on a week with weigh****chers or i could.  this was the biggest surgery i ever had my body had a reaction and it's not letting go but it will, it has to.  the one piece of constructive advice i can give you for your sanity although you probably won't take it because it is hard to do, Throw away your Scale.  if you trust you are doing everything you need to do then just stop mind ******g yourself every morning.  give it up even if only for a couple of weeks.  next time I'll weigh will be my 3 month visit, i just can't be disappointed daily.  As to the burping and belching aspect, it calms down.  I had it and didn't eat out for the first 4 weeks now its gone and it's fine.  Ordering meals.  Appetizers or a small plate or ordering a la carte. this morning i had a breakfast meeting and i ordered a side of bacon.  this seemed pretty decadent to the clean living oatmeal/granola bunch i was dining with.  i didn't tell a ton of people about my surgery either and so this seems like just another diet but i also have been surrounded by skinny friends who order small and leave what they don't want on their plates. There's also the I'm not terribly hungry, I'm not much of a morning eater, I'm trying to eat really light after 7pm etc.Besides your mother people will be far more concerned about what's on their own plates than yours.

It's an adjustment a big one and all the harder when you are not being pushed along by the losses but they will come.  your template is just a tad different.    

Oh, lady...I am soooo sorry you're having doubts and frustration. I was sleeved right about the same time, and hit my stall a week ago.

We all hear that it is normal, that it happens to almost everyone, that we shouldn't get discouraged....but, it IS hard when it hits you personally!

I'm overachieving at stalling-- I have managed to put on 2 of the pounds I lost over the last wee****ep saying, "This, too shall pass." but, I wi**** would pass a little more quickly!

Have you taken your measurements and compared them? If not....start that now! To give you an idea.....without giving out measurements...I tried on a dress in my closet Saturday.... And it was a little too tight to be comfortable.

I put it on yesterday - and it fit perfectly. I had to remind myself that I am getting a little bit smaller....even when the scales refuse to cooperate!

i really feel for you, sweetie.  it's such a shock to the system, physically AND psychologically, to have this major surgery and i can see why you're discouraged right now.  i, too, hate to wait, have hit stalls, all that stuff.  and i know you don't want to hear it, but this too shall pass.  i mean, hey, 80 percent of your stomach is gone, you're just not going to be able to fit as much in!  brandilynn has great feedback (as always!) and i'm  just gonna say: your body is recovery from a major physical assault 4 weeks ago, and it may take it some extra time to heal and "work" the way we all want our new tummies to.

sending big hugs!

You will learn to live with the stalls. They seem to happen to 90% of us. Right now you are "charting" how your body responds. Maybe you will be like me, lose 2-3 pounds, then hunker down in a completely stalled mode for a couple of weeks. Very few people lose a pound a day until goal--maybe the guys, but hey, we know how those masculine metabolisms are. I have learned to accept what my body wishes to do whenever it wishes to do it. It will hang onto fat and water as it so desires--remember, it is getting ready for that next big escape from the rampaging mastodon. Then, miraculously, it will decide not to fight the weight loss any longer (nor the mastodon) and you will drop several pounds. The depression and need to see weight loss is all part of the surgery. You WILL lose weight--everyone on here will guarantee you that--just take this time to log your food, log your weight, and "learn" about your body. After all, it has kept you alive all these years, now it is your turn to be nice to it and forgive it some of its foibles. Good luck, and I know the scale will change for you soon.

I totally understand your frustration.
I'm 3 - 1/2 weeks out and hit my stall at one week out!
I was losing 1 - 2 lbs a day then it came to an abrupt halt.
I KNOW they say this is "normal" BUT never-the-less it is frustrating
no matter what anybody says because we are so excited to FINALLY be losing weight only for it to stop so soon.  I would be much more happy if I was losing at least 1 -2 lbs a weeks instead of this dang stall. UGH!

Hey lady, I feel and hear your pain  BUT you could just be one of few that won't show anything on the scale for 3 or 4 weeks, then all of a sudden WHOOSH - 10+ pounds disappear from the scale!  I know that happens to me a lot! 

I know it is frustrating, I am not far ahead of you in regard to surgery date...I've been stalled but been losing inches and am now DAMN COLD all the time!!  TOM issues aside (which now are much heavier, crampier, longer and in general feeling like a stuck pig) that time throws back alot of hormonal stuff back into the loop.

Sound off on your frustrations, it's normal, expected and good to get it off your chest.  If you're not doing it already, track your food/fluid intake, track your exercising - whether it be a treadmill trot, yoga or toning - and get plenty of rest and your vits.

It will happen for you. You said yourself you're sticking to the rules.  Your body is trying to find it's new balance after the major surgery and massive healing it's undertaking.  Try to give your mind a break.....you're going to be fine.