is this really going to work?

 i'm scheduled for vsg surgery on march 7th. i have opted to only tell a handful of people, and feel like the reality of what i'm about to do hasn't really sunk in. am i really going to do this? i have tried so many diets, exericises, plans, all of it. nothing has ever worked. i have steadily gained weight, never loss. in fact, i have a sweet little girl about to turn 1 in a week, and since giving birth, it is the only time i've weighed less than the year before.

will i really lose weight? don't talk to me about i have to work it if i want it to work. working it has never been thr problem, it working has. i remember in 2007, i was planning for a trip to cancun. i was working out with a trainer 2 times a week, doing cardio 5, and eating like a dainty little model. i never lost more than 5 lbs. i remember my trainer standing there after she weighed me before my last session saying "i just don't get why you haven't lost more". me either sister. me either.

i want so bad to reach my goals on paper, but even better, not feel like this digusting beast slob, totally aware that people are watching what i eat, judging my behaviors, and critisizing my actions. i want to feel pretty and comfortable, in control and energetic. i guess i've gone one like this for so long (although i'm not that old) i just wonder if this isn't how i'm supposed to be. even though the smart part of my brain knows this is going to be crazy, the dumb part is thinking now way, your a fat girl. accept it.

i guess i just need to hear more successes, greater triumphs. not about the numbers but the feelings. the confidence. relating to this fatty who hears there is a light at the end of the tunnel, but still can't seem to see it yet.

thanks for listening ;-)

I could have written this myself before my surgery (which was only a few weeks ago) It is the first time in my life I have been given a plan that I have the ability to follow without feeling like im starving. You really do feel that "That's it I can't eat anymore" feeling. You will definately loose weight with the surgery..the only issue I can see would be not sticking with the plan once the "honeymoon" phase ends and gaining the weight back, which can happen. It still feel surreal to me as if I am not really loosing the weight or I will be the one person it does nothing for because nothing else has ever worked. But it does work and it will work for you!

PS- to date I have lost 16 lbs in the 17 days since surgery (22 all together including the pre-op diet)

I also feel the way you do.  My weight loss attempts have been largely unsuccessful, and I've always been extremely miserable the entire time.  Worse yet, I've now got foot problems that make it difficult to walk, much less exercise!  I feel like it is an impossible situation, but after reading through on these boards, I know that this tool has helped so many other people, and that I cannot be just *that* broken to where it won't help me, too.  

A friend of mine who had RNY done a couple years ago said something that really helped me, so I'll tell you:  "I feel like my body WORKS now.  When I work out, I gain muscle and lose fat.  When I eat less, I lose weight.  When I did these things before, they never changed my situation.  It's like someone fixed me!"

That's kinda how I feel - like my body doesn't work right.  I can work out for months and never feel stronger or like it gets easier.  I WANT to work at it (and it sounds like you do, too) ... but I also need to see that it's helping, otherwise what's the point of being so miserable?  The discouraged feeling is getting so, so old.

Anyway, my point is - I know how you feel, and I believe that VSG will help you (and me). :)  I look forward to seeing your results!!

Still pre-op, but I'm with you!  I think we all have that fear, and the psychologist I was required to meet with picked up on that fear.  He attributed it to other reasons, but that's neither here nor there and a whole 'nother story. 

I've researched enough to know that it will work, but also have a problem wrapping my head around that.  Some do have to work harder than others, and if you look here, you'll find a few who say it didn't work for them and they do look to revise to RNY or DS.  They are a very small minority.

You are not alone in your fear. 

Here's a link to a thread by a young woman posting here's who's had VSG. 
http://www.obesityhelp.com/forums/vsg/4391501/ONE-YEAR-100-1 13-2lbs-Lots-of-pics-its-a-book/#36303962
She's pretty open on the thread and in her profile blog.  Quite the inspiration.