Roxane Gay and VSG

Citizen Kim
on 5/22/18 2:09 pm, edited 5/22/18 9:03 am - Castle Rock, CO

That article is an awesome advertisement for NOT getting WLS.

A pretty obnoxious read for those of us who were stupid enough to have it!!!!

She shows every marker for failure and you know it'll be everyone/everything else's fault and not her crappy attitude and actions.

If her nutritionist is saying stay off bariatric forums, you know they're giving her SUPER crappy eating advice and they're worried we'll call them out.

Proud Feminist, Atheist, LGBT friend, and Democratic Socialist

Grim_Traveller
on 5/22/18 4:37 pm
RNY on 08/21/12

Reading her article, I was reminded of a comment a professor wrote on one of my grad school papers. She said: "You write so well that I got swept along and almost forgot that your point is completely wrong."

I wish her well, but if she was on OH, I'd give her an earful.

6'3" tall, male.

Highest weight was 475. RNY on 08/21/12. Current weight: 198.

M1 -24; M2 -21; M3 -19; M4 -21; M5 -13; M6 -21; M7 -10; M8 -16; M9 -10; M10 -8; M11 -6; M12 -5.

Jess Says Yes
on 5/22/18 4:59 pm
VSG on 10/24/17

Wow, I hadn't heard this either. This piece was really honest and heart-wrenching. I can empathize with so much of what she wrote. So many of the external challenges and internal struggles. I truly wish her well.

Jess

To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all. - Oscar Wilde

Age: 36 Height: 5'9" HW:326 GW:180

Pre-op:-32 M1-26 M2-11 M3-13 M4-10 M5-13 M6-8 M7-12 M8-7 M9-7 M10-0 M11-11

seattledeb
on 5/22/18 6:03 pm

She is an excellent writer. One of my favorites.

I hope she doesn't read this post.

I wish her peace and success in her journey.

Citizen Kim
on 5/22/18 8:02 pm - Castle Rock, CO

She won't read it, she's been told by her nutritionist to not go on any bariatric forums, so our opinions here won't hurt her.

Proud Feminist, Atheist, LGBT friend, and Democratic Socialist

H.A.L.A B.
on 5/23/18 3:08 am

I read the article and I feel bad for her. On one side she tried so hard to accept her body as it was and couldn't. She loved food and as she descidesc her "last meal" before surgery - she is a food addict.

In her 40's - she is still very sensitive to other people opinion. Specially strangers. Crying in her car when a moron on a parking lot called her fat - show a very poor self esteem.

She wrote that she had the surgery to please others. That is a huge red flag for me.

She admitted cheating in the hospital when she took "small sips of water".

I wish her well... But eating 1200-1500 Cal per day right now would help her lose weight. But most likely the number will get bigger and she is going to stop losing and regaining.

I am glad she is in therapy, because if anyone needs it - she is definitely the one.

Hala. RNY 5/14/2008; Happy At Goal =HAG

"I can eat or do anything I want to - as long as I am willing to deal with the consequences"

"Failure is not falling down, It is not getting up once you fell... So pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and start all over again...."

MoniqueW
on 5/23/18 4:33 am, edited 5/23/18 6:30 am

Thanks for sharing this piece. It's such a raw and powerful read. In spite of the author's pain, and sobering facts referenced (depression, suicide), I believe there is hope for her. She put herself out there when she outed herself as having a WLS procedure (not sure which one). That's pretty profound considering she's previously capitalized on promoting fat acceptance. I was also surprised to read that somehow she is still experiencing the highs and lows of missing certain foods at 4-5 months out. I thought, that by that point one would feel better. Her agony over missing food and the void from having a new relationship with food is pretty depressing. I am coming to grips with that revelation too. I am just three weeks postop. She seems frighten about failing with this tool. She needs to know that she doesn't have to fail and her tool will work but she will have to quit sabotaging herself. I sensed a great deal of defeat in her tone. I hope she will read this forum because truth is what she needs.


Highest Weight = 279lbs.
VSG Surgery Weight = 253 lbs.

Goal Weight = 175 lbs. (5'5)

Current:194

yeahokay31
on 5/23/18 8:52 am
VSG on 04/27/18

I am a huge Roxane Gay fan. I don't know how many of you read her books, particularly Hunger, but you should. I related to so much of what she wrote, and if that means I am headed to failure, so be it. She is an incredibly brave woman, and a true inspiration to many. And I agree with her nutritionist, she should stay off the forums---at least this one!

As far as the 1200-1500 calories, she was super morbidly obese, and very tall. If she was at 600-800 calories, what would she cut to when she got down into the 200s?

~thirty-something working mom of two~ HW 377 SW 303 CW 280 VGS 4/27/18~

Sparklekitty, Science-Loving Derby Hag
on 5/23/18 9:17 am
RNY on 08/05/19
On May 23, 2018 at 3:52 PM Pacific Time, yeahokay31 wrote:

I am a huge Roxane Gay fan. I don't know how many of you read her books, particularly Hunger, but you should. I related to so much of what she wrote, and if that means I am headed to failure, so be it. She is an incredibly brave woman, and a true inspiration to many. And I agree with her nutritionist, she should stay off the forums---at least this one!

As far as the 1200-1500 calories, she was super morbidly obese, and very tall. If she was at 600-800 calories, what would she cut to when she got down into the 200s?

600 - 800 calories is standard intake during the weight loss phase for most folks until they reach goal. There is no adjustment based on current weight.

If these forums are so terrible, why are you here?

Sparklekitty / Julie / Nerdy Little Secret (#42)
Roller derby - cycling - triathlon
VSG 2013, RNY conversion 2019 due to GERD. Trendweight here!

yeahokay31
on 5/23/18 10:49 am
VSG on 04/27/18
On May 23, 2018 at 4:17 PM Pacific Time, Sparklekitty (Julie), Science-Loving Hag wrote:
On May 23, 2018 at 3:52 PM Pacific Time, yeahokay31 wrote:

I am a huge Roxane Gay fan. I don't know how many of you read her books, particularly Hunger, but you should. I related to so much of what she wrote, and if that means I am headed to failure, so be it. She is an incredibly brave woman, and a true inspiration to many. And I agree with her nutritionist, she should stay off the forums---at least this one!

As far as the 1200-1500 calories, she was super morbidly obese, and very tall. If she was at 600-800 calories, what would she cut to when she got down into the 200s?

600 - 800 calories is standard intake during the weight loss phase for most folks until they reach goal. There is no adjustment based on current weight.

If these forums are so terrible, why are you here?

I wrote a response, but it didn't post, so lets try again.

I come here because I like to read about other experiences, for support and information. I don't regularly post here because many who do seem to be rather abrasive. It is a turn off and not helpful. I posted today because I felt the need to defend Ms. Gay, not that she needs it, she is wildly successful, but I found the negativity in a lot of these responses sad. If she is looking for support, this is not the place for it. Being needlessly aggressive under the guise of "telling it as it is" is an excuse of a person with no tact. And I am not just speaking about this post, I read quite a few here that have turned me off.

And I am responding to you not because I actually think you care what strangers on the internet think of you, but as a point of personal pride and to let you know that you are not the least bit intimating. And others who may have stayed away from this forum because of the sometimes belittling and condescending responses should not be intimidated as well. That is all.

~thirty-something working mom of two~ HW 377 SW 303 CW 280 VGS 4/27/18~

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