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Ponder this thought: Are the holidays really about food? You no longer have to spend your holidays filled with what you get to eat, want to eat, avoid eating, or dieting on January 1st. You've changed your lifestyle and priorities since surgery, so spend the holiday with people you love, let relationships – not food and drink – be the important part of the holiday.

Look around you, what do you see? People are rushing around getting ready for the holidays. It's all too easy to get yourself stuck in the same old stressful cycle of unhealthy eating during this time of year. During the holidays, food often becomes a central focus in our lives. Family activities, social functions, and even work-related activities often are centered on food. Maybe past holidays were spent in a vicious cycle of eating and waiting for the New Year to start our next diet. Perhaps this feeling is, in part, due to a lack of conscious thought about what the holiday season really means to us. If we can take this into consideration, then we might be better able to spend time doing what we really think is important.

Many times before surgery, the holidays were a time to indulge in extra goodies possibly not available or abundant during the year. The neighborhood cookie exchange, potluck parties, eating at restaurants, office parties, or the special dish that your Aunt Martha makes only during the holidays. This year can be less about food and more about doing things with family, friends, and new traditions.

Take time to decide what the purpose of the holiday season really is for you and your family and friends. All you need to do is pause for a moment and look inside yourself. Define the holidays in any way that is meaningful to you. Create your own traditions that reflect your values. The holidays can be spent without focusing on food; put your focus on you and your family and friends! Rituals that focus on family, friends, and community take many forms.

Focus on meaningful traditions: Make a list of all of your seasonal activities and obligations, even if you don't consider them to be "traditions." Which events and activities are meaningful and which aren't? Which ones reflect your values? Could your list use some tweaking, or maybe deletions and additions?

Have fun! Remember that treasured traditions don't need to be complicated or even particularly profound. Sometimes they're just fun! Driving around looking at the festive display of lights is a simple, enjoyable holiday routine. Singing holiday tunes together is another. Some of the most memorable rituals are just to "hang out" with the family by watching a movie at home or playing board games.

Focus on giving yourself: For those who experience loneliness during the holidays, consider inviting a group of friends to your home. If your focus during the holiday season is to be part of a larger community, give the gift of your time. Most organizations need volunteers just as much, if not more, than they need money during the holiday season. Call an organization that interests you and see what you and your family can do to help out.

Focus on personal reflection during the holidays: Put your personal centeredness and spiritual growth at the heart of your holidays. The focus of contemplation at this time of year is "the light renewing itself, bringing hope and joy." Focus on bringing light to your life by choosing a new goal for yourself and support it with specific actions. Some examples are staying centered throughout the season by practicing a period of silence and deep breathing whenever you begin to feel stress; extend kindness to all those you encounter by focusing your compassion on their vulnerabilities; or practice patience and tolerance toward fellow travelers by being a courteous and aware driver.