The Perils Of OBESITY DISCRIMINATION

    The U.S. population is now at least two thirds overweight, with those designated as obese by BMI and other measures being the fastest growing group within this category.  It has been predicted that nearly one in two children will be overweight by the end of this year.   Obese children are the targets of ridicule, bullying, social exclusion and the like.  They are victimized by their peers, teachers, and other adults; even by members of their own family.  They are more negatively stigmatized as a group than kids with any other characteristic for which they might be targeted, be it race, ethnicity or some other defining characteristic.  The weight bias suffered by children is staggering, tragic and entirely avoidable.

    Unfortunately, the prejudice-if not abuse-suffered by overweight children is not limited to them exclusively.  Many who are obese, whether overweight as children or not, often wrestle with body hatred, embarrassment–if not humiliation and shame, self-loathing and self-contempt, depression, damaged self-esteem and a range of missed or lost opportunities.  They suffer job discrimination, denial of job advancement opportunities and relationship frustration.  They are excluded from a host of social and economic opportunities simply because of their weight, size and appearance, regardless their intellect or substance, character or charm.  Most, if not all, of this prejudice and the obvious accompanying painful emotional fallout would never be an issue in a more sensitive, caring, understanding and embracing society.  Sadly, we have light years to go in accomplishing this in the one that we call home to Americans of all shapes, colors and ethnic origin.

    Just listen to Linda who recently responded to an OH request for examples of weight discrimination that they suffered. Linda blogged in frustration, “I had been debating on surgery for a few years. In September 2009, I went to Tokyo, Japan. Because I am a large person, I got dirty looks from people on the airplane, comments were made on the subway and I was generally ignored if I had a question or wanted to buy something. I felt invisible. At 300 pounds, it was humiliating.  The day after I landed in the US, I called and scheduled my seminar and had RNY December 15th.  I plan to go back to Japan in May. I don’t think I’ll get ignored or receive the scathing looks I did in September.”  How ironic that the larger one’s size, the more invisible the obese individual so frequently becomes to others.  How sad to think that Linda must rush to a physician to alter her body in order to feel accepted by others, whether in this society or abroad.

    How about thisbe777 who reflected about  being denied a job opportunity despite her obvious qualifications?  She commented, “Back around 1981 I was in the process of moving to another state and with the help of a friend who lived there, lined up a job in a lounge as a bartender/cocktail waitress.  I had been to bartender’s school, had experience doing both jobs, and was pretty darn good at it from what I’d been told.  The manager told me over the phone that they had a job available and really needed someone who could wait tables and work the bar.

    When I arrived, I went down to meet her and to get things started.  When I got there I noticed that all the employees wore tight, low cut little striped shirts and white jeans.  The manager looked at me (I was about a size 18), then tersely informed me that they had no job openings.  I guess she didn’t think I’d look too great in their little outfits.  All I could say was that it was her loss, because I could have worked circles around anyone else there.”
    There is plenty of data now available clearly showing that those with weight difficulties are often discriminated against in a host of settings.  We know that this kind of bias can significantly harm the physical and psychological well being of individuals while decreasing their willingness to get help and stick to whatever aids and loss/maintenance strategies are available.

    Another unnamed OH respondent painfully captured this with their comments. “I was fired from a job. My boss’s boss made him fire me. When I asked my boss (and mentor) why his boss seemed to hate me his reply was ‘Well some people relate fat to lazy’...it was chilling....and while at the time a crushing blow that made me hit rock bottom, now I see it as a pivotal turning point and I’m so much better off not working there.”

    Those deemed obese by a variety of conventional standards are routinely insulted and ridiculed both subtly and in more obvious and blatantly disrespectful and damaging ways.  They are often identified as “lazy, stupid, incompetent, and unqualified” and given many other hurtful and inaccurate labels.  In fact, consider for a moment the highly popular and successful network television show The Biggest Loser.  This prime time program does a terrific job of pulling at our heartstrings while championing the successful and often dramatic non surgical weight loss of the contestants.  Yet, some have rightfully criticized it for promoting “unhealthy, unrealistic and unaffordable weight loss regimes.” Furthermore, it “reinforced that being obese is an individual’s fault and that individuals should take personal responsibility for weight loss.”  The show was chastised in that it “promoted a simplistic notion that obesity is caused by binge eating and a lack of exercise”.  Finally, The Biggest Loser “perpetuated damaging, negative social stereotypes of people living with obesity.”

    Consider for a moment the title of this show.  An interesting double entendre, don’t you think?  What associations do you typically conjure in your head when you think of a person as being a “loser”?  Nothing flattering I would venture.  The show’s title communicates a message, whether intended or not, that influences our perceptions and attitudes about those struggling with obesity.  It risks fostering a mindset that furthers our negative associations with this population of folks that is accounting for a larger percentage of the U.S. population as we enter this new decade. 

    As recently as this morning, I was driving to the office listening to the radio, channel surfing for a brief moment when I happened upon a nationally syndicated radio host hawking the merits of a well known weight loss system.  The host suggested, and not too subtly mind you, something to the effect that if one wanted that next promotion, shedding about twenty to thirty pounds with the help of this weight loss program would certainly grease the job advancement wheels.  And therein lies the rub, a massive and corrosive societal problem that harms countless obese individuals.  We as a culture have learned to all too frequently value style over substance, outward appearance over competence, and the shapely over the supposed unsightly.  We brand those overweight with discriminatory labels that do nothing to promote wellness, only shame and wasted talent.   So many of us are guilty of sleepwalking our way through life; mindlessly loyal to the toxic assumptions that drive how we interact with our fellow man and woman.  There really are no phrases that aptly characterize the cruelty and wounding that the obese individual suffers at the hands of others.  Even the descriptor “obese” itself, has negative connotations.  All one has to do is reread the blogs of those brave folks referenced earlier to realize just how malignant a process obesity discrimination can be.

    So how should obesity discrimination be addressed?  The answer on an individual basis may lie within the comments of those who were quoted above.  Those who are comfortable within their skin, regardless their size or appearance are more likely to value themselves with immunity from the hurtful prejudice of others.  Tackling this issue on a societal level is of a magnitude and challenge that space here does not permit.  There is no doubt that so many of you who have read this article may have an opinion one way or another; something that might foster another article at a later date, a forum to include your ideas and suggestions.  What do you think?

    Stephen Ritz, PhD, a clinical psychologist practicing in Decatur, Georgia feels privileged to have worked with WLS patients for nearly twelve years now. Dr. Ritz may be reached at 770-270-5488 or sritzphd@hotmail.com.

    WD135


    22 Comment(s)
    Comment by VolvoRottie on Apr 08, 2010 at 11:21am
    I'm sorry I'm fat is my new personal tagline. I was never fat until a severe, orthopedic injury laid me up at 34 yrs old and the hosp. put me on steroids to reduce swelling; same thing happened when I had major open brain surgery in 08 - right after I lost 23 l bs via severe dietary restrictions and massive 5 mile hikes at the height of my menopause so that I'd be broiling hot 24/7 and still hiking like a fiend. In a coma for 10 days and then 8 weeks of rehab learning how to walk again all on steroids to reduce brain swelling packed those hard fought pounds and i learned how a fat woman becomes invisible in all settings and my employer fired me after they saw me return lugging the pounds around. I'm going to see if my BCBS will pay for the lap band so I can drop 100# to 120 again - being thin was like a doorway to acceptance and not being written off as a big fat loser. It's sickening how we put thinness down as a character trait. My hubbby eats 4X what I do [I eat one time a day and make it no carb and low cal] and is skinny at 55 yrs of age. I'm sick of being fat and invisible.
    Comment by JUSTCHEL on Apr 10, 2010 at 09:26pm
    At my last full time job I had "someone" submit my work name, e-mail address, phone number and work address to several websites. They signed me up at Jenny Craig, Bally's, fatfriendfinder.con and findyourfatlover.com among others. Having lost my best friend one month prior, I was in no shape to handle the harassment emotionally. I started receiving weight loss "starter packages" in the mail at my office as well as phone calls. Using one of the auto responders I got the IP address of the computer from which the requests came but neither of my supervisors would follow up. If I wasn't so emotionally overwhelmed at my recent loss I would have gotten a lawyer and sued the pants off them. My current job wouldn't tolarate that from employees but customers are fair game. Just last week I had a customer with a small child, maybe 4 years of age. The kid stood there in front of all my colluagues and yelled, "WOW, YOU ARE SOOOOOOO FAT!" I was mortified, but my normal response would have been a chipper, "Yeah I am. Isn't that GREAT? God makes people in all sorts of shapes, sizes and colors!" But instead, the mother smacked the child, who then cried, again to my mortification. Then, as the mother was finishing her transaction, the kid said, "Your face is soooo big!" THe mother then clamped her hand over her kids mouth and literally dragged her out of my office. I am tired of being publicly humiliated. I am tired of the snide comments and gestures, of people talking behind my back instead of to my face. And just this week I was told my company doesn't cover WLS. Guess where MY loyalty just went?
    Comment by Aliyasmom on Apr 11, 2010 at 10:44am
    I had RNY on Feb 23, 2010. I can relate to the bartenders story. We lived in Vegas for 5 years and I had alot of job frustrations while living there. I ended up going to bartenders school as well and did really well. I was and still am a great bartender. I love the job and wish I could do it full-time and make the money I make now. Anyway, I cannot tell you how many interviews I went on from leads given to me from the school, and was turned down at every one. One job made me wait for almost 2 hours, then I was told the manager left. WTF?? If you aren't thin, have big boobs and a tight ass, you can forget about getting any decent money-making bartenders jobs...ANYWHERE. I ended up getting my first bartending job at a primarily hispanic bar in the ghetto. it was awful but gave me some experience. But even there, I wasn't allowed to work on Friday or Sat nights, when they were the busiest and could have made alot of money, because I was too fat.
    Comment by beepaa on Apr 12, 2010 at 04:45pm
    As Much as we all want to beleive that other people cannot treat some like this it is so True. My wife never relaized the kinda Pain and Humiliation I said I had gotten until one day while walking through a parking lot two guys drove up and started shouting profanities about my size and weight she was mortified at this level of stupidity and immaturity these young people showed to me. Once I was talking a nice walk with my first granddaughter thank god she was only two at the time and a Car slammed on their brakes just to yell out to call me a Fat Slob. I realize everyone has their own predijuices in life but come on People Get A Life. My Surgeon just started a website and one of their sayings they have posted is "Walk in the shoes of a morbidly obese person for one day and you will understand their suffering". I had my Lap Band Surgery last July 27th I had lost 51 pounds prior to surgery and now have loss another 110 total 160 down with another 60-80 to go. I am now going to a gym on a regular basis still feel a little bit out of place there but you know who cares if I offend you! I have the full support of my Family and they see a huge change in me not only Physical but Mentally. I am proud who I am AND HAVE ALWAYS BEEN PROUD SORRY TO THE LITTLE MINDED PEOPLE OUT THERE WHO NEED TO GET A LIFE I AM PROUD OF MINE.
    Comment by pjm6162 on Apr 12, 2010 at 06:14pm
    I have been overweight my entire life. I weighed 125 lbs. at the age of 5. Needless to say I have been teased, tortured behind being overweight. Unfortunatley people judge us on whats on the outside not whats on the inside. In 2003 I had RYN surgery. I lost 120 of my 543 lbs. Unfortunately I have regained 60 of the 120 lbs. I lost. I am so tired of the looks, stares and comments from people. I hope someday the prejudice towards people that are "obese" will subside. The world would be such a better place.
    Comment by rachel1129 on Apr 13, 2010 at 02:20pm
    I had lap band surgery in Nov. 08, after a lifetime of being overweight and years of being invisible on the job, a thirty pounds weight loss helped not only my image but my intelligence as well, at least as far as my boss was concerned. My lap band has failed and after six months of ignoring the problem, I am scheduled for RNY surgery next month. I am trying to get myself mentally ready for another onslaught of attention and opportunities at work once the weight begins to come off.
    Comment by maniakmyke on Apr 13, 2010 at 05:05pm
    you know it always amazes me that even with the amount of advancement we can make in so many other fields such as technology culture etc etc. and yet the sheer ignorance that the human race is something we simply make light of. For example its now considered a hate CRIME when someone acts in a hateful manner towards a different race. and yet we still make abominations in hollywood like shallow hal! just the shear THOUGHT of that (and i use this term very loosely) "film" is enough to send me into a rage. I still dont see the difference when some bigot calles an african american the N bomb and when someone calls me profane names towards my weight. as far as im concered peoples views towards people with weight issues is nothing short of a form of racism and what makes it worse is its a socially acceptable form of racism. funny how its taboo now to call people N**** or make fun of someone in a wheelchair. yet 3/4 of the room laughs at a fat joke. and they wonder why we suffer from depression. in all honesty i have no idea how ive gone this long without losing my cool and getting into a fist fight over this kinda crap. but yeah anyway thats my little addition. chin up everyone our day WILL COME!
    Comment by maniakmyke on Apr 13, 2010 at 05:23pm
    ok and half my comment is missing...nice...
    Comment by jmshadowdancer on Apr 13, 2010 at 06:59pm
    I honestly think that with 2/3 of the American population being overweight, that counts as a sizeable enough group, who share the similar experience of not finding clothes that fit, of experiencing isolation and annoyance due to the weight.... I honestly think that overweight people should count as a protected group against hate crimes. Stopping your car to yell "Hey fat bitch!" should be considered a hate crime. If it was "Hey N*****!" it's still an action of hate towards another person. One thing I think we should remember is that we can always win our battle with weight someday, they can't change ugly.
    Comment by nutbat on Apr 14, 2010 at 07:28am
    I agree that things are not very good in the fat acceptance department of the world. But I do think that The Biggest Loser, although it presents an absolutely non-maintainable lifestyle and people do gain weight back, it's made "regular" people see us as people too, with our own personalities and emotions. I know that I feel more accepted when people see me working out, etc. than I did before that show became so popular.
    Comment by Vipergurl38 on Apr 18, 2010 at 11:01pm
    I've been overweight all my life. The first and last time i've ever worn a bikini was when I was 1. Growing up being so overweight I was/am constantly being made fun of, stared at, talked down to. I hate it. Yet at the same time, I guess I'm use to it. I've never known any different. But this year I turned 20 and I'm looking back at how my life has well...been wasted away so far. When I was 10 I would go out, hangout with the few friends I had. But as I got older the bigger I got. And the bigger I got, the less and less I wanted to leave the house. I losted contact with friends, I ended up not graduating High School because I hated the stares, I've never had a job and I've had one boyfriend who I have to say I was blessed with when it lasted. He is that "first true love" and he loved me for who I am. But he moved back home now and he has his own life. There is just so much that I want to do, places I wanna see and I fear walking 10ft out my front door. The ridicule from walking down the school hallways, the streets....its something I can't and refuse to deal with. And I want to change things...but how am I suppose to when the moment I walk outside I feel 100 eyes on me and hear people whispering? I don't insult others, I don't stare, so why me? Why all of us? Just last week I was walking to the hospital with my mom so we can hear my blood test results. As we walked I asked her "How come more of the Asian community seems to stare at me?". Just as a different comment I had read a woman went to Tokyo and was bascially stared at & ignored. Now the hospital I go to is in an area more populated with Asians than other cultures. And I would be stared at....and it wasn't the "stare, mutter something and look away". It was a straight forward stare and if I looked back they would keep staring. I had this on a number occasions and one night I even yelled back after having numerous groups of poeple in that area look at me then nudge their friend to look too. It was rediculous. Ugh...well the day I went to the Dr.s for the blood tests I decided I'm getting the surgery and hopefully my mom will follow. I LOVE myself. But I'm tired of my body holding me back. I want to be free and be able to be me to the fullest. Sry...I kinda rambled on here.
    Comment by FSUMom on Apr 24, 2010 at 01:13pm
    Reading these blogs make me feel so sad and what everyone has said is so true. I went to Dillards today, it is higher end store, and very nice. The moment I came through the door, three male workers greeted me NICELY and asked me if I needed anything. I politely said, no thanks, and I thought, since I lost my weight, people do treat me so differently and it is so very wrong, this is a sad commentary on life.
    Comment by lrussel5 on Apr 24, 2010 at 04:46pm
    I am less than 2 months out from surgery. I can see the weight that I've lost mostly from my face that has gotten thinner. All the sudden I've noticed people (men) looking at me more when I am in my car. Then, when I get out and they see how big I am, they will quickly look away. Funny part? I am uncomfortable when they look at me and relieved when they look away!
    Comment by booksarebest on Apr 25, 2010 at 05:24pm
    I get it too. Twice I've been relegated to the very back row of group pictures at work; now I just refuse to have my picture taken. Of course, this makes me a "bad sport." Had a hairdresser tell me my face was "too fat for any hairstyle" she could do; had a guy I was dating - briefly - tell me that I was smart and funny...but he really wanted someone with looks, too. But hey - "someone will appreciate two out of three, right?" The actress Kathy Najimy wrote on her own weight loss how the different attention she received post-weight loss was stunning. She asked a wonderfully grudging question to the men who suddenly seemed to see her as a person once the weight was gone: "Would I have beguiled you so about a hundred pounds ago?" And I think we all know the answer to that one.
    Comment by Jenna40065 on May 08, 2010 at 09:27am
    I was slender as a teen, and in my 20's had a double compound fracture to my right ankle, and 14 reconstructive surgeries on it. Was relegated to a wheel chair for a while and went from being a very active and healthy person to gaining 100 lbs in 2 yrs from not being able to be active. I naturally have a slow metabolism and when I couldn't move around due to my injuries I naturally packed on the weight even tho I wasn't over-eating. The despression set it and more weight came with it. I went to Six Flags in St. Louis once and wasn't able to ride the roller coaster cause I was too fat to fit in the restraints. It was mortifying. I remember the teenagers calling me names and laughing at me when I had to leave the platform. Once night at the movies with my ex husband a group of teens started "mooing" at me and "oinking" I ran to the car and cried like a baby. I've had phone interviews for jobs and been offered jobs, and shown up for my first day to only be told once they saw me that the position was no longer available, then see the position listed online the next day again. I'm college educated, talented, and extremely intelligent. However, all employers see is my weight. People assume that fat=lazy. I'm far from lazy, I keep a clean home and even tho I don't have a real job any longer, I clean people's houses to make money to pay my bills. Its a damn shame that a woman with a 160 IQ and an education from St. Louis University is relegated to being a housekeeper for a living cause of society's prejudice against obesity. I'm supposed to be getting my surgery in a few months, I can't wait to be able to be active with my kids and enjoy life without being harrassed by small-minded people!!
    Comment by BariatricCoach on May 10, 2010 at 11:39am
    Thank you for writing this article. My highest weight ever was 305 lbs and I lost 160 after RNY 5 years ago. As time goes on,in my new slim body, sometimes you forget how bad it was back then. I have dedicated my life to those who struggle with obesity as I did through my coaching. Your article just brought up so many hurtful memories. Let us all remember those who are still fighting this battle. We may see a smile on their face, but most are hurting deep down inside. Let's make it our business to make them VISIBLE again. Coach "T" www.terrilipsey.com
    Comment by KSandru on May 11, 2010 at 03:40pm
    Oh goodness, I empathize. I have been fat all my life for 2 reasons: 1)Sexual abuse as a child & young adult and 2)Good Southern comfort food. I was abused by an older family member, then orally raped by someone whom I thought was a friend. I was also subjected to emotional & verbal abuse from some of my family members due to my weight. I choose food as comfort and as a crutch to keep people away. Then after a series of bad relationships I met & married my soulmate in 2003. He loved me for me, and he treats me like a queen. We have 2 beautiful boys. But then over a year ago, I was fired from my job because my manager refused to accomidate my high risk pregnancy with my 2nd child (I was 46 y.o. & weighed 360). She fired me in retaliation for reporting to the EEOC & to HR. Thankfully, my husband supports me. But now, I don't love this extra weight. I need to let go my crutch for my health & to be here for my 2 boys. So, I am looking to get it done. Losing the weight would also enable me to shed the cloak of abuse I have been hiding under for 40 years.
    Comment by Meg_S on May 26, 2010 at 06:17pm
    I can feel for everyone too. I have been fat all my life and have tried all sorts of diets over the years but I either don't lose weight or I do lose it but then start "having just a little" of this or that and bingo the weight is back on. I finally decided to have surgery in March and let my employer know my plan, trying to be professional and above board. My employer is now laying the groundwork to terminate me before I have my surgery so they don't have to hold my job for 6 weeks while I recover. I am documenting everything at this point. I am going ahead with my surgery anyway, it will make me a better interview candidate.
    Comment by bettyjoeweekes on May 31, 2010 at 07:38pm
    would that be great if we all learn to be kind,tolerant and acceptance . . . "And a FatAss will lead them. Ye shall becomes a a rotund chubby cheeks . . . tada" lol roflma Instead of war, we could picnic. okay? k? K?
    Comment by kane100574 on Jun 18, 2010 at 09:07am
    I posted a story I wrote in my blog about my high school experiences. It is truly amazing how people treat a child or other children treat/or taught to treat each other.
    Comment by butterfly7 on Oct 13, 2011 at 08:08am
    Discrimation against overweight people is very true. I can realte to this article.I applied for a job once, and the lady that interviewed me looked me up and down..even said they if they hired me they would have to buy a bigger chair. I have been in the ER in pain, really hurting due to my back..the doctor says yea it probaby is hurting..you are big enough.It goes on and on. People act like overweight people are not human beings. If I hear that I have a pretty face one more time, but the rest of you. Its really sad but society bases a persons value by their size. I wont even apply for jobs anymore because of my size. I am trying to get weight loss surgery for health reasons,but very sad how people are discrimated against because of size.
    Comment by Lori54555 on Mar 18, 2012 at 08:15pm
    Can I just say that I have noticed many of the comments above are reflecting the idea that if you lose weight your life will become better. Big or small, YOU have to learn to love yourself before you will be happy with anything or anyone. Weight loss is not a magic pill that takes away your stressors and makes life grand. Many people who have gone through WLS have found that nothing has really changed other than their body size, which in turn has put them in a deeper depression. Wow, the one thing that they thought was going to change everything really did not. Let me tell you that I am not a small person who is telling you this. I have been overweight (obese) my entire life. I am not lazy, and it is not genetics that caused this. For me, it is lack of motivation, plain and simple. Do I hope that after my WLS my life will be better? Of course. Do I really think this is a realistic happening? No. I have to learn to love myself before I can be happy with anything else.
    Login to leave a comment.