Confused, Sleepless in British Columbia

Hey Guys, I really need some advice here. I can't shake this feeling for the past week now and don't know if it should be shaken. Well, for my story, I guess I'm in the stretch run for WLS. I've got the funding. Found the doctor in Mexico, Dr.Joya, that I want to perform the surgery. But as I've heard many, many times. Do your homework. Research this and see if its right for you. Well, during my research, I have stumbled across two Yahoo Groups that are themed on WLS complications. After reading some of the horror stories there, I am so confused on what this surgery does long term. Some of the stories that are on this board are heartbreaking. I'm just so lost on whether I should make that next step and book this surgery. We seem to hear so much of the positive but not as much negative. These two websites have been a HUGE wakeup call for me, and have made me re-think whether or not I'm doing the right thing. The reason I ask is that I've just turned 28 and have a lot of years to live. If this surgery helps me live 20 years longer but those 20 years are going to be in pain, then I don't want it. Any of you guys know more about the long term of this surgery?

Hi Bobby, WLS is, of course, a personal choice--and a life-and-death choice. It is also a choice to risk something big for something bigger and better: a richer, fuller, freer, less self-conscious life. Being morbidly or supermorbidly obese is a CERTAIN impediment to a full life. WLS is a risk too, but only a POSSIBLE risk for dire consequences. Read Dx's profile for a realistic look at complications followed by success, happiness, and gratitude for WLS. Whatever choice you make we'll support and understand. Many, if not most, of us had anxieties and doubts. I actually cancelled scheduled WLS three-plus years ago determined to "really try this time" and succeed on my own. In the end, I went for the surgery (5 months ago) and was ecstatic from the moment I came out of anesthesia. Every day since WLS has been better. I have hope that I didn't have the whole time I was huge--40 years off and on. I didn't have WLS until I was 60, so it may seem as if I was risking "less life" than a "youngster" like you, but. really, don't we all risk all that we have (however long or short that may be) all the time? We drive in psychotic traffic, ride motorcycles and mountain bikes, etc., etc. You are wise to do your research, but do it with a big dose of skepticism. Many websites have axes to grind. This Locker Room has, I say cautiously as a newbie, not so much an axe to grind as big collective mind and heart made up of currentlly and formerly really big guys. We're here to say that while only you can make the ultimate choice, you are not alone in your fears and hopes. Sorry for the long reply, but your struggle brought back my own years of wanting to have WLS, reading hundreds of pages, watching TV reports, going forward, pulling back and finally knowing that for me, WLS is a godsend and the time was right. In the end, happiness is an inside job. I wish you well whatever you choose. Doug Such

Hey Bobby, go to this link http://www.obesityhelp.com/forums/men/postdetail/47786.html?vc=0 I asked the same question and got a really good response from the men a few weeks ago, you can read the dialog on the link. It's a do or die surgery. I'm 6' and 400 pounds, i have a greater risk of having a heart attack than dying in surgery. My co morbidities that I deal with every day is greater than any problems I have down the road after RNY + I'll be a whole lot skinner when middle age/old age kicks in. You don't see many 400 pound 65 year olds. You are right, this is something you don't jump right into. Try to stay out of those memorial rooms, it's like news reporting - after watching all the bad you think there's no good but actually the good far outnumbers the bad. The one's who are post surgery 5 years or more just disappear from the forums because there comfortable with who they are.

Hey Bobby. I'm a relatively young guy as well (33) and I don't regret having the surgery at all. I'm getting into the best shape of my adult life and relearning how to be healthy. I was 525 heading for 1000. Now I'm 350 heading for 200. Nobody can make this decision for you, but for me, it was one of the best I've ever made.

Hi Bobby, do you know the complication statistics for the doctor you are considering, the hospital, etc. That is the real research that you need. Overall, the complications are higher than other surgeries, but that is usually because the doctors or hospitals are not properly trained. When people mean research, that is to find the best doctor, best hospital so that you limit the potential for complications. Overall the national average is 2% mortality - that's what they tell you. My surgeon and the facility I had my surgery at has a .2% mortality rate, 1/10th the average. Obviously that lowers your risk - finding the best surgeon and best place for you - not just the lowest cost. Most of the biggest complications are also because of the other things the people have going on. Where are you weight-wise. Diabetes? Hypertension? Apnea, Cholesterol? Neuropothy? You can greatly reduce your risks by focusing on losing as much weight before surgery as you can. The after diet for most is really South Beach with limited calories 400-600 per day until you reach your goal weight or at least 75% of the weight you need to lose. With all that said, WLS is a last resort thing. For most who have the surgery the risks of not having it far outweigh the risks of having it. Losing the weight without surgery is always preferred. If you think you can get there without the surgery, do not have the surgery. If you don't think you can, then the risks of continued yo, yo, dieting and the complications to your body are likely more than the risk of the surgery if you find the best doctor, best hospital, and do your part to lose as much as possible before hand to reduce the risk of any complications due to your own condition. I wish they would list the complication rate by starting weight. 300-400, 400-500, over 500lbs, etc. and age. I'm sure the complications go up as the starting weight goes up and age goes up, but I've never seen the stats put this way. Final thing, if you focus on the negative stories that's what you will think about and fear grows faster than anything. Stay off that sight. It just feeds your fears. But at the same time do your research and don't rush into anything. Hope this helps. Greg

Hey Bob, wow some of the new models have jumped in and really given you some good advice,,, I'm 21 months out and a nurse... as far as the long term aspect, this RNY type surgery has been done for decades, not for weight loss but for cancer type patients..and it was very sucessful, but they don't have staticits for the long term on weight loss.... I saw these rebutal pages, and weighed the good news against the bad, some of the bad out come pages are really graphic....and these people can really go at it....that is their choice, and anyof us have the possibliity for having a bad out come... I do not discount their pain, but I do wonder, did they have a psych eval before they had surgery....we are addictive people, and we love to blame anyone else for our porblems...that is just my opinion.... There is always someone whe is checking groceries, that had a friend of a cousins boyfriend, that had the surgery and died....but that is all they know....and the bad word, even in the nursing community always has more legs than the successes... For me...this is the hardest thing I have ever done...and would do it again tomorrow, if I needed it....that is me... Do your home work, ask more questions, and ask your doctor.....I came flat out and asked my doctor...."How many people that yo have worked on died????" his answer...never on the table, never becasue the surgery was bad, several becasue of pre-exicting conditions....he was stunned at my direct question..but ask it...if he ***** foots around a direct answer...nail him!!! Do you homework, get you rhead straight, ask all the questions you want... Wecome aboard Russ

Hi Bobby: Have you considered the lap band? I assume that you are talking of the bypass surgery. The band has a much lower complication rate than RNY but also has a much slower loss rate. IMO the band is an excellent option for some people. The pros and cons of each surgery has been discussed on this forum in the past and if you wanted some good honest input into these pros and cons let the board know and I'm sure you will get a good discussion going. The lower complication rate was the main reason that I chose the band and I am very happy with that decision but I also think the RNY is better suited for many people even with its higher complication rate. Anyway this is just a thought for you to consider if you have not already. Terry

Hi Bobby, I did the same thing myself. I was all ready to do the surgery and stumbled across the memorial page here on OH. I read every one of the posts. After that I found the forum about people who have had complications. Well I did the same thing as you, I questioned if it was worth it or not. In the end it has to be your decision. I thought back to what brought me to the point, that I said I wanted the surgery in the first place. I have never told my wife or any body what it was but here goes. I was to the point where I could barley wipe my ass. I have heard other people here say the same thing, so that is why I can talk about it here. I thought what if I gain another twenty pounds or forty pounds, what am I going to do. I was close to 400 lbs. and at 5'9" and all of it aroud my middle I couldn't get around it to tie my shoes or anything. My best advice is to make your choice of surgeons carefully. Make sure you feel good about putting your life in his or her hands. If you decide to go through with it, do everything you can to make it easier on you and your surgeon. Follow your surgeons instructions. I had to have a lot of testing, but by doing so I think that it removed anything that might have complicated things later. The surgeon told me by my following my pre-op diet and shrinking my liver it made his job easier. In the end, you have to make the most informed decision you can and do what is right for you . pan head

Hey Guys, Thanks for sharing so much valuable information. You guys have really helped me with this situation. I think it's easy to focus on the negative in this case because there's the voice inside my head reminding me that this is a pretty major decision. As for the doctor, I know people have frowned on doctors in Mexico before but I have done my research on him. I've talked to a number of his patients as well as went on to those WLS gone wrong boards and searched if any of them had this doctor. As for stats, the doctor has head 1 death in just over 500 RNY's. The death was due to a complication from a previous esophogus surgery that the patient didn't tell the doctor about. The doctor begged the family to allow him to stablize the patient before they moved her back to the States, but they refused and she died shortly after arrival in the US. His complication rate is less than 0.5% in the first 14 days and is around 2-3% long term, which is about average from what I'm reading. Long term deaths he said he's not aware of and that is because it is difficult to follow up with patients out of country. They don't actively respond to their requests for information.

BobbY: This is what I love about this forum. Your concerns are so valid... imagine if you did not have a safe place to openly share them.. we are so lucky to have each other. I also was ready for surgery 3.5 years ago... decided to try dieting one more time... lost 85lbs gain back 90lbs. not only was this unhealthy for me physcialy but it kicked my ass emotionally. I internalized that I was a "failure" one more time... I just beat myself up over & over.. not telling anyone else how ****ty I was feeling.. or how low I was.. just kept on being the funny fat guy .... When I reconsidered WLS 13 Months ago, my ass was kicked... I needed help... this disease was killing me... I did my homework.. read the pro's and con's... than I did something very odd... I asked the man upstairs if this was the right decision for me... I remained still ( mentally ).. and within 2-3 days I was at peace... in my heart and soul I knew it was the right thing to do... I did not let anyone "sell" me on anything... I had to trust my inner-self... seek guidence from my higher power... You are on the right path... you will be o.k.