I've always been very shy and quiet and confrontation makes me uncomfortable and anxious, even if it has nothing to do with me. I live in a basement apartment and my upstairs neighbours are a disaster - lots of fighting, yelling and swearing at the kids, stomping around in shoes all the time, music turned up loud. They got a puppy when there is a no dogs rule, the puppy cries all day long. Just generally bad housemates. I have never said a word to them, I just try to avoid contact and wear my headphones 24/7 to try and block them out. I should have said something ages ago, but the awkwardness of it just left me seething inside and on the outside pleasant and nice and sweet. 

But then Friday happened. They were both home, both kids were home, and the puppy they aren't supposed to even have had been crying all morning. I'm working from home until January so I have to be here, can't just leave. The adults start fighting, and I mean serious fighting. It escalated to the point where he chased her, she was screaming that she couldn't breathe and "please don't hurt me". I lost it. I went up to the basement steps and screeched my head off. Completely flipped my lid. Swore at them, told them they were bad parents (which may have been crossing the line but I still don't feel bad about saying it because who carries on like that in front of their children?!) that they have no respect for anyone else in this house, I'm sick to death of the sound of their voices, I don't want to hear it any more, next time I hear this bullsh*t I'm calling the cops, they have pushed me too far etc etc. I must have screamed for two or three minutes and they didn't say a word, except for the husband who said he wasn't hitting her. She texted me later to say thank you/sorry and I laid in to her again, another big diatribe about how awful they all are. Whether she was being abused or he was threatening her, or she was just panicking/hysterical I will never know. I knew both of them before they moved in and let's just say there is a sordid history of her cheating, him freaking out, divorce, reconciliation, more cheating, and the kids being the last thought on either of their immature minds. 

But, the point of this post! For the first time in my 30 years I have finally found my voice. All the years of saying nothing, of pushing down my anger, of eating my anger, of putting a smile on my face and pretending it's fine - no more. Now that my rage has been unleashed I wish I could walk around yelling all day long. Of course that's not healthy, but I am so so SO happy that I seem to have found my confidence. The smaller I get, the more sure of myself I am and the more respect I feel I can command from the ones who used to treat me like a doormat. I have every right to live in a safe environment free of violence, the threat of violence, and unnecessary noise. I'm an awesome neighbour - silent as a mouse, clean, don't get in their business, no one comes banging in the back door at 2 am on a Tuesday, I don't have parties every weekend. I deserve the same respect. I'm sure my little melt down doesn't mean much to them, they are just those kind of people and Sunday it was back to yelling at the kids all day again. But it was a huge step for me. And now I'm almost looking forward to the next time they have a brawl just so I can bust out my anger. And call the cops.

Anyway, that's my NSV for this week!

Confidence to stand up for yourself! Love it!

They are bad parents, I grew up in this kind of an environment and I can tell you those children probably love that you did this. It's good for them to realize their parents are not the norm.

I am proud of you -- and look at that ticker drop...You're more beautiful than ever!!

Thanks! I'm so sorry to hear you grew up in that kind of household. I really hope the kids upstairs get that their parents are not the norm, that the kind of abuse they put on one another is not love. Hard to say though, they are only 6 and 9 so their little brains are like sponges. 

And thanks for the compliment, that makes me feel good :D Your ticker is falling too!!

Wonderful that you have found your voice and for the well being of those children please call your local children's aid society and try to get them some help.  It sounds like a scared place for you to live and your an adult I cannot imagine how horrible it must be for those kids

editted to add it is the law that everyone reports children that are in need of protection under the child and family service act and if they are witnessing being exposed to woman abuse they are at risk as well the impact on children is huge 

actually, you are only sort of right. all community professionals must report suspected abuse. the general public does not, but in this instance i most def would! you can call and ask to be anonymous as well.

for the sake of the children, if nothing else, please call.

Yes, Children's Aid has been called. Only time will tell whether anything is done though, they were here in the summer (which had nothing to do with me) and as far as I can tell nothing has changed.

Good for you for finding your voice. I hope your confidence keeps growing

Thanks Pat :)

I congratulate you on finding your confidence and speaking up for yourself!  Next step -- finding a new apartment.

Here's to the new you inside and out.

Thanks! That's the funny thing - my dad is the landlord. My parents own the house, so I feel like I shouldn't have to move, it should be the dopes upstairs. Up until now I don't think my dad realized how serious things were. Things might be in motion now though. At this point I have stepped out of the equation and am letting my Dad/authorities handle things.