Does my WLS define me?

 

For
reference I had my gastric bypass on July 2nd, 2012.



I researched WLS's to death... to a fault at times. My biggest concern when
considering WLS was possible complications, pain and recovery. (I have a Blog
or whatever on my OH profile talking about this if you feel like you would like
to read) Although directly after the surgery I felt like this WLS was going to
define me. How could I keep up with this lifestyle. It was so overwhelming. The
protein, the water, my heart wrenching breakup with food. How can I do this?
How can I keep up. The vitamins? Ugh. It was like my life was no longer about
living, but about adhering to this lifestyle. Of course I considered this prior
to surgery. I just figured, well I'll have to do it and I'll just have to deal.
Now in the reality, gawd could I actually do this? It's 4pm... how much protein
do I have in, what abou****er? On top of this lifestyle I have a very
stressful job, a husband, and two active young children. So is this my life
now, WLS and the rest just flies by? What did I do? This surgery is going to be
my life and my definition.



Then there is the mind F@#K of the surgery. Is
everyone looking at me? Do they wonder what I did? What do I say? How do I
answer questions? WHOA... my clothes are falling off of me. My face is sooo
much thinner!!!! My ass is looking nice but I still instinctively avoid
mirrors. I still pick up the 3x off the shelf and try it on. My mind cannot
accept that my body is in an XL. I'm still me, but my body... is that me? This
whole process, is this just me... my life now?



So at almost 4 months out, I am NO veteran. I do not have the time or the
wisdom that years out provides, but I do have some newbie insight.



This WLS process, because it IS a process, a journey, does NOT define me. The
first few weeks were hard, no doubt... but at the same time it was fun and
amazing wrapped up in one skinny ball. I did feel at times it was taking over
my life, but then everything just blended together nicely. Protein is no big
thing now... it's just part of my day. I've worked it out the best I know how.
My water and vitamins are easy peasy (thanx to nurse Kelly and her vitamin
schedule.) I follow my body's lead. I've experienced a couple stalls and they
were just what I needed. My mind goes through a lot accepting my new weight
loss... so the stalls give me some time to wrap my brain around how I'm shaping
up. Then I start loosing again. Honestly some days my life is so normal and I
feel so normal... I remind myself I re-routed my organs. I eat like a normal
person now and not like an empty pit. I go to lunch with my friends, I eat
dinner with my family and I attend parties where there is food. I eat like the
person I always wanted to eat like and life it absolutely fantabulous!



I know everyone’s experience is different and I'm not downplaying possible
complications, head hunger and the mental process this is... but I'm saying for
me... i am still me. A better and more confident me. Not a fat person who had
WLS... just me... a cooler version of me, a better mom and a happier wife.



Good luck to all considering this journey! I hope my insight helps someone,
somewhere :) Sometime!!!

 

I am new to the journey and I am inspired by your journey. Thanks for posting.

I felt a bit like it defined me for a while.  Certainly my life revolved around it for a while.  For about the first year, I think almost all I ever talked about was vitamins, protein shakes, and whether or not I was nauseous.  I worried every time I went somewhere about whether or not there would be something suitable for me to eat there.

But now, at almost four years out, it's just another part of my life, like the fact that I wear glasses and have PTSD and share my  home with three cats and am a vegetarian.  Life did get back to normal for me, but it took a while.

Well said! I have felt all those things and more. At times I do let WLS define who I am, but my family reminds me that I am still who I was before. That I am healthier and happier most days and I can do all the things I used to before I became too heavy. Thank you for your encouragement it means so much to newbies and some vets who are off track. Congrats on your accomplishments.

Yes, at first it consumes your life and it may SEEM like it defines you (but it doesn't). Eventually, however, it just becomes the way you eat, etc.. At 5 years out (and it has been this way for a couple of years now), other than the extra vitamins I take, my RNY is pretty much just a part of my medical history like my blood clots, my appendectomy, or my thyroid oblation.

Lora

I am a month out and that's exactly how I feel right now.  I'm trying to figure everything out and all I do is plan, think and talk about it.  I know eventually it'll become second nature.  Before surgery my life revolved around food and it seems worse now lol.  I also have this weird thing about what happens when I reach my goal?  What then?  I've been so obsessed with my weight for so long, what do I focus on then?  It's crazy, I know. Thanks for sharing your story!

This whole thing definetly does one on the mind :)  Since things have evened out a bit...I knew in my heart I needed to find something for me to do... a hobby.  So I got myself a puppy   !!!!!!  LOL, I just love the little guy.  I take him to puppy classes and I train him all the time.  Just what I needed. 

I am 8 years out and it in no way defines who I am ...  Very few people know I had RNY because I have moved countries twice since I had it and so it's absolutely not necessary to discuss it with anyone now. 

I eat and exercise like any other fit local (it's a CO thing!) and so no one would know that I am any different to them ...  because essentially I'm not!!!

Oh, and I don't think Kelly is a nurse - she might be a poet though

Oh I totally thought she was an RN :) 

In a way, I don't think it's a bad thing that it defines you. Every piece of food has to be scrutinized before eating. Long gone are the days when I could just order whatever I wanted at a restaurant. I have to pre plan and always pack a bag when I leave the house. Or I will screw up somewhere along the way and get a not so healthy meal or snack. My husband was deployed right after my surgery. So my kids acted as the food police, for fear I would get sick from eating the wrong thing.
I have to weigh myself to stay accountable every day. I have to squeeze in exercise in some way shape or form. Even if its just walking my dogs. I have to keep my mind busy or I will want to eat and eat...just graze all day.
Everything just has to be well though out for the day. But it is a completely different life than before