Company at the hospital

My mil took me to the hospital and waited until after to leave, but after that I was alone.  I slept a lot and walked.  It was only two days, and I was fine.

You are not over reacting. It is scary to be alone in the hospital.You will be tired afterwards and you will want to rest.I would have your husband take you to the hospital then have him go home.You will feel better knowing he is taking care your daughter.

I was by myself at night.I had my husband come after he got done work. I knew I would be sleeping.I didn't think he should stay.I didn't mind being by myself.I figured if I fell asleep I would feel bad if someone was there.

My DH came afternoons and my 23-year-old DD came on release day to wash-n-curl my hair for the trip home. The nurses gave me WAY more attention (and instruction/advice) when I was alone---learned valuable information from them I might not have otherwise.  If you are afraid, maybe you can request ahead of time a hospital room across from the nurse's station.  

First, I'm so sorry about your Mom.  I can't even imagine not having my Mom around, and I'm sorry for your loss.

I stayed alone after my surgery, but then again I've had countless hospital stays since my first as a 15 year old (no one stayed with me then, either), so I'm not afraid.  But I know others haven't necessarily had the same experiences or any experiences and staying alone can be stressful for sure.

Is there something in particular you fear?  Because most nurses will go out of their way to keep you calm and comfortable (it's actually easier on them that way too!) and they are really good at soothing fears and worse.  Just be really open about what's worrying you going in, and don't let yourself get into a panic attack before you ask for what you want/need.

Was there something your Mom used to do that helped you?  Would someone else be able to do that?

And I'm with the other poster on bringing something from home.  If I know in advance I'll be going in for more than a night, I like to pack my own bag.  Even seeing the bag itself reminds me that I'll be home again eventuallly and lifts my spirits.  I also have a particular pillow I love.

It'll be ok.  It really will.  Best of luck to you on this exciting new journey!

amy

edited for spelling, as always

Thank you. It has been the hardest time of my life. I am almost 40 years old, and seriously don't know how to cope with my Mama.

My sons and DH were there most of the time.  My Denver son came to be supportive and he slept on the uncomfortable chair beds that are for overnighters.  He was so miserable that he went to his brothers house the next night.  It was nice to have someone for part of the time.  What I do object to are friends that pop in.  I feel like I have to be hostess and it isn't the time for that.  The nurses will help you although I didn't get much sleep at night because their station was right outside my room.  It was very noisy, ask for a room far away from them.

You'll likely doze off and on  after surgery due to the anesthesia effects.  I did not have anyone stay the night with me as it just wasn't necessary. I did take my portable DVD player and a number of movies that I just thoroughly enjoyed through out the rest of my stay.  I had day visitors but night time was just not necessary. If you are a bit skiddish and feel you want someone to stay you should ask if this is approved by the hospital.  My sister actually asked the nurse if she could stay but they frowned upon it.  They do take good care of you.

I'm on the opposite side of the experience.  My hubby and parents were there during the surgery and until I was settled back in my room.  At that point, my sister came and stayed with me.  I am sure I would have managed because the nurses were all very nice. However, I did like having her there. She was restful and read or worked on her computer quietly while I snoozed until it was time to potty, walk, or I needed some water.  You will be resting a LOT, so you'd be better off with no one instead of someone who will drive you nuts.  However, it was nice to be able to walk all I wanted with her beside me without worrying about taking a nurse away from someone else.

I think, this is just like the biggest thing I've ever done, that I don't want to be alone. I don't want to be without someone if something goes wrong, or if I'm upset. I am a big baby. I mildly freak out over getting an IV.  Maybe we will have his sister come, if she can, and play it day by day.

My hubby came to visit every day but only for 1 hour a day.  I was too tired to be good company.  I too lost my mother and it is hard, but you will e fine in the hospital.  Remember, your Mom will be there in spirit so you will never be alone.  I wish you the best.