Still here

Jan 18, 2010

I guess I took it for granted how long this process really was. I was really thinking that I would have a surgery date by now, if not by the end of this month. That is definitely not happening. I know that a lot of it had to do with my appointments being scheduled around holidays. It always takes longer to get things done when a lot of offices and things are closed or booked up around Christmas and New Years. I'm trying really hard not to be down about the little progress I've made so far, but today has been a bad day and it's not even noon. First of all, I missed my first nutrition appointment. I can't believe it. I just totally forgot. Woke up at 6:45, got my daughter ready for preschool, got her there in time, came home and started on laundry and then my phone alarm goes off reminding me that my appt started in 10 minutes. 10 minutes! It takes me 20 minutes just to GET there. I called the office and explained but they are so booked, they really could do nothing for me besides reschedule. For FEBRUARY 3rd. Two whole weeks away. Wow. It took me a month and a half to get this appt and I MISS it. I just can't believe it. I feel so bad. I think I might start calling every morning, very early, to check for cancellations so that maybe I can squeeze in early. I know that I must sound terrible, but I am such an impatient person and I just really want this FINISHED.  I don't know why it took Tricare so flippin' long to refer me to this nutritionist in the first place, I got my psych referral almost a whole month ago. That went pretty well and tomorrow I actually go and find out the results of my personality test and "interview". Yes, you have to do all of that stuff. Took me by surprise. I knew to expect an interview, but the personality test blew my mind. It was 341 questions on a scantron test sheet. Crazy. I really hope that I passed, but I feel confident that I did. The psychologist who interviewed me was very kind and at the end of our session she told me that she thinks i'm very bright and very mature, which is uncommon in the young women she sees for this kind of surgery. I didn't really know what to say to that, except to thank her. It was nice to hear that, but if she knew how impatient I am maybe she would think differently of me, haha.

Another thing i've had to do before getting this surgery scheduled is an Endoscopy which I REALLY wasn't expecting. That was slightly unpleasant, although I did find out that I have a hiatal hernia and an H. Pylori infection, so i've been on tons of antibiotics. The infection explains a lot, I had been feeling quite sick on and off for awhile.  Dr. Williams assures me that he can fix the hernia while he is doing the Lap Band installation, so I feel ok about that. I am just thankful that I didn't have cancer or anything. I know that happens a lot. 

The main thing is that I am SO SICK of being this weight and I can just see the light at the end of the tunnel. It's just a long tunnel and I wish I were at the end already. I know that I'm not anywhere close. I really hope that I can have my surgery scheduled for the end of Feb or early March. I was hoping to visit some friend and family in Texas for Thanksgiving and be a smaller size, but I don't see that happening unless I can get things going quicker. Wish me luck. I will update next month and hopefully its with better news.

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