Needing a little encouragement

Feb 23, 2010

     For the first time during this process I am feeling a little apprehensive! This entire process for me has been a busy one, you know how it is one appointment after another with a few support groups in between. Well at my last office visit I decided I would like to lose a little more weight in hopes of going for a laparascopic procedure as opposed to an open. (have I made the right decision?) Well the problem is that while losing weight before, I had the appointments and support group meetings to keep me occupied. Now there are no appointments to attend because I have completed all of my requirements and there was only one support group meeting so the reality of the process is starting to fade. My next appointment is March 5, 2010 but for some reason it just seems so far away when in all actuality it is less than 2 weeks away.  I have been finding myself wanting to eat out of pure boredom and worry and although I am fighting the urge it is proving to be a difficult battle. Although I have taken a few blows, I am not ready to take myself out of the fight, so I guess I  just need a little encouragement to keep my head above water. I have remained positive thus far and now I am questioning or wondering what hindrance is going to stand in my way. I am wondering if my pressure feels so heavy because there are so many family members that I am not telling and now maybe I am feeling guilty. But guilty about what????? Any family member that I have not told, it was for my own security and protection. So that I can avoid the thoughtless opinions of others and their WLS horror stories that they heard through the "GRAPEVINE".  How have some of you maintained your sanity while waiting to complete the next step of this difficult process??????? 
 "I am only as strong as the faith I keep and the prayer I speak"(trying my best to pray without ceasing)

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