8 more days /annointing/eating/gasping/FOREVER

Sep 25, 2010

Last noc after church I received the Annointing of the Sick to prepare for surgery.  Just 8 more days! 

I've been falling asleep this weekend, just dozing off et on, only to be awakened suddenly with a gasp of air (I don't think it was my sleep apnea) , thinking I was having surgery or I was already postop.  This isn't some thing you can 'take back' after it's done.  It's FOREVER.  I'm getting butterflies in my stomach ALOT more often now.  This surgery is like another birthday...like childbirth.  A momentous occassion!  Something to be celebrated!  No mourning is in order...even though I know that is normal too...but it is forever and it is something that I'd like to think I have moved into the stage of acceptance.  However, I bounce around in those stages.  Right now I'm bargaining a bit and bouncing around from denial and acceptance.

I've gone back to some old ways of eating and am finding myself saying, "it's the last time"..."It's for old time sake"  "I'll never be able to eat/drink like this again".......  It's not going to be easy to do the postop eating...but I know it can be done and I know I can do it!  The small bites, chewing really well and not drinking with meals are going to be tough.  But everybody says it will become second nature after a while.

With my husbands help, I reorganized part of the kitchen to accomodate me/myself and I!  After I looked at it, there really isn't much a person needs to get ready for this surgery.  At least not in the beginning stages.  Maybe after I get to some regular food, I'll look at Eggface a little closer and actually cook!

I'll be having my preop labs done on Monday...it will be interesting to see how my vitamin levels are...if they are going to be checking those.  They should be great!  I've been taking everything the way I should, but I know that after surgery my absoption will be different and it's the after labs that are the most important.  At least I'm beefing myself up...with protein too!  After the Dr. visit, labs and a NUT mtg, my DH and myself are going shopping.  Going to but some cream soups, etc...I need to order some more Celebrate MVI's.

Just talked with my daughter.  She is so supportive of this surgery.  She reminds me of my main motives for doing the surgery...my Health!  We talked about getting together on Thanksgiving.  She is going to pick a 'ready to eat' prepared meal to bring home.  I told her I might be able to try a little turkey.

Today, I have a Walkathon related to my Hospice.  The weather should be great.  I'll be walking so I'll get my 5K in for the day.

Well...that's my BLOG for the day.  I have a feeling there will be even more the close I get to surgery.  The COUNTDOWN!!

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