free4l1fe
7 days out
Apr 03, 2012
Today marks my first week out of surgery! I think this has been the longest week of my life. I've gone through so many emotional stages.-I've felt remorse for going through with such a drastic change, and putting my body through this. I've had thoughts of wondering could have I have just lost the weight on my own (yeah riiighhtt!!!).
-I've had thoughts of excitement for what my future holds with carrying less weight on my body, and all the stuff I will be able to do with my kids.
-I've had thoughts of mourning because I truly miss my best friend food. Food is my comforter when I'm sad, my way of celebrating when I'm happy. How am I going to deal with my feelings now that my rock is gone.
Tomorrow I finally get to add in protein shakes. I've only had water, broth, sf Popsicles, and sf jello for the past 7 days. I've gone from 295 to 279.2, but have a hard time getting excited about it because I've basically starved myself all week. I'm so afraid that once I start my protein shakes and then in 3 weeks mushies, that my weight loss will stall or that I will regain.
My biggest fear this entire journey so far, has not been complications from surgery, but of failure to lose weight on my part. I started counseling 3 weeks prior to surgery and will continue throughout my journey to help me deal with all the new feelings surfacing.
So far, as much as I miss food (I'm literally dreaming about it every time I sleep lol) I am still happy that I have this surgery. I know that with a lot of hard work physically and emotionally, I can eventually become a healthy person.
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About Me
University Place, WA
Location
49.7
BMI
Surgery
03/27/2012
Surgery Date
Dec 11, 2011
Member Since
