gishstar
Starting Over!
Apr 17, 2013
It was almost a year ago when I decided enough was enough and I needed to get weight loss surgery. I was excited that I made the decision, but scared about the process. I had had my gall bladder taken out 4 years ago prior and I remember the process of not being able to eat certain foods, and constantly running to the bathroom because I ate something I shouldn't have.
While I'm looking forward to getting my life back, I'm also not looking forward to the recovery process.
The shits.
The upset stomachs
The potential vomiting.
All of it scares me, the first two I can handle... but the third one terrifies me. I actually have a phobia of vomiting, which is why I know that this surgery will help me stay away from sugar if it means getting a case of "dumping syndrome".
See, I LOVE sugar, and I HATE vomiting. This surgery will help me so much to stay away from sugar, and make better decisions. Not that I don't make better decisions right now anyways, but it'll help me to really stay on the straight and narrow since I despise getting sick so much more than indulging myself.
I opted for the RNY because my chances of getting dumping syndrome is much higher than if I were to get the sleeve, or the lap band. Strange that I'd be wanting to actually torture myself like that, but it's a matter of my life and my future.
Now I just need to "reactivate" my support group, and make strides to cut out the things I can't eat.
I'm glad I'm starting over again. I'm afraid of not being able to eat like I do now. A friend of mine said that those fears go away once you see your progress. I believe her, I'm just still nervous about the change. The other good part is that my waiting time for surgery is HALF of what it was with my other insurance carrier.
Previously, I needed a 6 month doctor monitored diet, dietician meeting, and psychological evaluation. Now, I only need a 3 month doctor monitored diet. Something about having to only "diet" for 90 days isn't as overwhelming as 180 days were. Right now, I am on day 17 of 90... and I've GAINED!!!! What the hell?
I suppose I should keep a more detailed food journal. I'd really like to not have my knees, hips, and feet hurt like they are.
I have like no patience. Something to work on while I go through this journey.
