heathercross

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Had lunch with Heather.  She and I got to know each other thru this site back in 2002 when we both had our RNY's done.  Lost touch as I moved to Philly, moved back to NYC, she had kids, life happens.  So, we met at her office and had lunch. I had lunch (salad & ice tea) she had protein shake.  She was just a month out from the BOB.  Asked many questions, grilled her with this, that and the other.  She looks great.  Gave me some support, advice and guidance which was just what I needed.  Interestingly, she told me she didn't have to do the full 2 wks of liquids pre-surgery, which I am jealous of, but, what are you going to do!  She told me to talk to Lisa as well as she has been esp. helpful.  She also made me realize this is a do-over and we will do it differently this time.

When I had the Gastric Bypass back in 2002, my sister, mom and husband (now ex) were all supportive. I also spent a lot of time on these boards and going to support group that I found support in many different places.  Thankfully, I've kept in touch with close to a dozen people locally who had surgery at Lenox Hill in NYC and they are still a big part of my life.  Some have kept the weight off, others have not.  In addition, apparently, I was a big support to others (calls, visiting them in the hopsital, etc) that I got the pay if forward in spades and now people are coming out of the woodwork to help me (I was a regular on these boards from 2002-2005).  While not religious, I thank  God for those people in my life.  This time, I wouldn't have the support of a spouse (he was amazing post surgery and post plastics) but I hope to rely on my friends who are my family.  I also know that what made me successful for the first 6 yrs was that support from friends, family and support groups, so, I will take advantage of anything and everything I can get my hands on.

Had a pre-appt with Dr Stiles and Dr. Kurian today.  Needed to see Stiles so she could clear me. I don’t have a PCP anymore after my last one left the practice and my new one did me up for $3K in blood work last year as she thought she "knew best" about post- RNY patients and ignored my doctors script.  Nothing much to report with Stiles.  Just answered a lot of questions, got weighed, etc.  Happy to report Im still a big fat 246.6. 

Met with Kurian afterward.  Had MANY MANY questions from both me and my mom.  She even allowed me to call my mom and put her on speaker phone. She asked what my biggest concern was, it was (of course) dieing. She hugged me and said she wouldn’t let me die. 

  1.     Length of stay – 23 hours 2.     Length of Surgery – about 2 hours bc of the hernia repair 3.     When – last surgery of the day (maybe 5pm) so she can schedule me for an x-ray the next morning 4.     Lap vs. open – Hates open procedures and infections, plans to do it lap. Doesn’t think she will have to open me up and will avoid at all costs 5.     scars from ps – should affect anything, will have 5 little slits in tummy, impressed at how good my stomach still looks (fairly flat) 6.     Removability – yes 7.     Port location – left side above waist 8.     Which band am I having and why? – lap band  - FORGOT to ask if it’s the large or the small band, need to ask or email 9.     Prescription meds, when should I stop drinking? – No more wine after Memorial Day 10.   Iron – keep taking 11.   Incisions above or below belly button? – see above 12.   How often does the band slip? Reasons? remedies? – bands do slip from overeating. She said that BOBsters have less instances due to excess scar tissue 13.   Hernia? Acid reflux? – I have a hernia and she will fix it, if she doesn’t, the band won’t work. 14.   My stomach is stretched, but, you said my stoma is fine? 15.   How often does the band erode? Fixes? –does happen, can be replaced 16.   My gallbladder is very large, will it have to be removed? – no, doesn’t like to do 2 surgeries at once. She doesn’t recall telling me this, not sure where I got this from, Leitman? Roslin? 17.   Mom’s concerns This surgery is much more rigid, I won’t follow the guidelines – Kurian knows me and thinks I’ve learned, Bobsters are so thrilled to have the restriction back they wouldn’t allow anything to fuck this up!

Yes, I do need some positive reinforcement especially after the conversation I just had with both my Mom & Sister. My mom is dead set against it and my sister is indifferent which pisses me off just as much or more.  My sister, the nurse, who sees everything as black & white and no gray, still doesn't see obesity as a surgery and the first thing she says to me is, "what will you do in 5 yrs when you regain weight".  My mom is more scared about complications.  I think if they can guarantee its done lap, she is fine, her concerns are more about if they open me up to do the band and if I have to spend time in the hospital as hospitals are breeding grounds for infections.  I understand that.  She also feels this surgery, over the RNY, is much more rigid and I won’t be able to follow the guidelines.  Right now, I'm just really really low.

Looking forward to going as last month was Passover and the attendance was almost non-existent.  I shuffled my schedule to go so I am looking forward to asking more questions and connecting with other Banders. I hope to maybe meet a BOB there, but, we will see.

UPDATE:  Apparently meeting was cancelled but no one told the 6 of us that waited outside a locked room.  Very pissed off since I moved a client appt and took a $25 cab ride in the rain!

Rec’d call from Nilsa at NYU. My surgery was approved with Dr. Kurian. Apparently, everything that Dr. Roslin’s office submitted was enough to get me approved NOW. Nilsa offered me May dates, I chose June bc I wanted to make sure I was covered under my company’s STD and LTD policy. My 1 yr anniversary with my company is June 14^th, so, I chose June 23^rd for the BOB. My mom will come up to NYC and help me for a few days.