ObesityHelp

This past weekend I attended a conference in Phoenix, which I had attended the previous year, at the same hotel.  I remember last year that the stairs from the lobby to the meeting rooms were something to be avoided that time.  I took them a couple of times and had to pause and rest and was beat when I finally made it to the top.  Halfway through the weekend this year I realized that I had been bounding up and down that very same staircase multiple times without a thought, not wanting to wait for the elevator.  It brought me to a complete halt with mouth gaping and a huge smile on my face.  What an amazing difference.  I am a different person.  I had an additional moment of glee when some old friends who were also attending the conference breezed by me, until I called to them - they had not recognized me.  It was AWESOME!!!!  Can't wait until next year, since I am only 4 months out from surgery and have a long way to go still! 

Started day 6 of the liquid diet today.  I'm hungry but it's not that big a deal. I find that qute remarkable.  Last night after my soup and jello I watched my son and his girlfriend eat a streak dinner.  While I thought, gee that looks good.  I had no desire to tackle either of them, grab the meat and find a defensible corner in which to crouch down and eat it.  I was actually full and happy with what I had "eaten".  Very, very weird.  I know some other people who have cheated on this part of the journey, but I am determined not to.  This is supposed to help shrink my liver and make complications less likely and that is something that I want dearly, so I am being a good girl.   I have a bit of a headache today which is annoying.I don't know if it is food related or not.  What is really freaking me is that there is a really nasty cold thingy going around and I don't want to catch it, but still have to work and live my life.  So I am just firmly fixating on the "I refuse to get sick" mantra.  I go in today for my mandatory nutrition class.  I am looking forward to it.  Heck, I am looking forward to it all.  I am on this emotional roller coaster which I am sure those who have gone before me can understand.  I swing between elation that my surgery date is finally arriving and the oh my god what am I doing I could die positions.  It's kinda like an out-of-body experience - my rational self is looking at my chicken little self and shaking her head.  Eight days - to short and then forever.