Onmyweightohappiness

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I had my 6th doctor's appointment yesterday. Nothing really out of the ordinary with it. Talked to my doctor to let her know I would have to do a 7th visit with her. She joked that my insurance company is sending me thru the ringer with this and I so had to agree! I asked her about doing my pre-op but she recommended me using the hospital they suggested. I have my last visit with her on May 12th.

After I left my appointment I got on the ball of calling to see if I could get my other appointments set up. May 1st I will go get my lab work done. On May 7th I have my ultrasound of my gallbladder at 7am, EKG at 9am, Nutritional Evaluation at 11am and my pulmonary at 1pm. Then I have my psych eval on May 17th at 12:30pm. So that completes all my requirements. As of May 17th I just have to wait for my surgeon to submit and then wait on insurance. That's when it will all hit me. Right now it feels like a dream. I am so ready and anxious for this surgery. Something needs to change and obviously my body has given up no matter what I try. I just can't go on living like this anymore. I am tired of being held back in life because of this monster.

I have really been trying to make some good changes in my life. Just to do it because it's healthy and plus to prepare for this surgery because I want to be a success story.
I have done well with cutting soda out. I use to have atleast one or two glasses a day and sometimes I go without one at all during the day. Been trying to drink a lot of water. I am drinking 34 oz while at work and trying to drink more. I still get the Diet Coke urge but if I can do it a few times a month vs every day of the month that will be success.
I have done pretty good with eating right. I keep buying fruit or veggies, rice cakes, crackers things like that to snack on or have for my lunch at work. I really don't mind eating healthy at all, in fact I love healthy food. I just get fustrated because nothing shows on the scale of my positive changes. Although if my surgeon's scale is the same as my doctors that mean's I lost 2lbs. I did cheat a few times this week and had a few cupcakes, one on my husband's birthday on Monday and one yesterday for Gage's. I refuse to not allow myself sweets or things of that nature. That will only want me to have it more. I just want to limit my intake on them or just not really have that temptation around at all.
I am proud of myself today I almost went across the street to grab something to eat, but instead I ate my two oranges and a rice cake. My latest addiction is the white cheddar rice cakes. Yum! I know I will have my bad days and my good days but atleast if I acknowledge my issues everyday and am aware of them. So much of it is mental. Even one of Dr. Ferrari's patients in the waiting room told me that. It totally makes sense now.
We leave for vacation tomorrow! I so can not wait. We are flying up to Minnesota to see my family and our friends. I haven't been home since Sept. 2009 and Dominique hasn't been back there since July 2008. So it will be a fun time. We will be celebrating Gage's 1st birthday with everyone. Plus I have a few other tricks up my sleeve as well! So excited! I am in need of a vacation anyways, life has been so hectic lately I haven't had a chance to have down time. So I look forward to the 10 days off! I gotta finish packing tonight, I hate waiting till the last minute but so much of the things we use on a daily basis I can't pack them up sooner. Exhausted from this week between working 10 hr days and getting prepared for this trip. I decided to wait until I got back to continue on with my other appointments I need prior to surgery and insurance approval. I am glad I did because no way this week would I have had time for anything!

Till next time.....

I had my appointment with my surgeon today. I was so nervous on the way there, reality is starting to set in and I am another step closer to surgery. Got to the office and turned in my packet of paperwork I had filled out, handed over my DL and insurance card. Sat down and there was a lady in the waiting room along with me. She asked if I was a new patient of Dr. Ferrari and I said yes. She said "Your in great hands, he is an amazing doctor he did my surgery 8 years ago and I had to come back and have it re-done because I didn't eat right after wards the first time." And went on and on about how great Dr. Ferrari was. So that made me reassured some more. I had read reviews online about Dr. Ferrari and I have yet to find a negative comment!

They called me back and weighed me, which I lost 2lbs since my last doctor's appointment which was cool! And took my blood pressure. Brought me into the exam room, the assistant asked over some of the answers I had given in the packet. Found out I have to do 7 visits to my doctor not 6 like I thought. Which is fine. I have other fulfillments to meet anyways for insurance so one more doctor's appointment is fine. My goal is to have everything done by the middle of May.

Then Dr. Ferrari came in and met him. Really nice guy. Asked some general questions. Asked why I wanted surgery, did I know about the surgery I was choosing, explained things about the surgery, what to expect, etc. Explaining the key to success is making healthy eating habits and healthy life choices for life. Which I totally agree with. Whether I have this surgery or not, I know I will have to deal with food the rest of my life. He looked over my information. I was kind of shocked he didn't lecture me about still smoking. I told him my goal is my April 30th to be smoke free. I am down to 5 a day now or sometimes less. He made no remark that I had to smoke free X amount of weeks prior to surgery so that kind of lessens the pressure a little bit. He did a quick exam of my stomach, not sure what he was really looking for, guess I didn't think to ask until I thought of it now LOL. He told me with my young age, no prior surgeries and commitment I have that the surgery should be a success and he things 100lb weight loss for sure. I can't imagine it honestly. Pinch me I would feel like I was dreaming! I would have to stay in the hospital two days. Which I knew prior. Once I complete insurance requirements we can submit, get approved and get a surgery date set. Was a rather short and sweet visit. Guess I was expecting it to be a lot longer, but then again I had no idea what to expect!

After I was done with Dr. Ferrari I met with his assistant who gave me my "homework" assignments. Which basically is the remaining requirements needed for insurance. I have to complete a nutritional eval, a psych eval, get a full panel of bloodwork, schedule to get an EKG and ultrasound of my gallbladder, complete my two remaining appointments with Dr. Burns. My goal is to have all this complete by the middle of May which gives me a little over a month to do. And with the next two weeks with me basically not being able to do any medical appointments leaves me about two to three weeks after to get them done. I think it can be done. And I asked the assistant if Cigna insurance is pretty quick with approving and she said it's one of the quicker ones, so that was a sigh of relief. I really hope I can get this all done by the middle of May, we can submit and get my surgery scheduled for June. Crossing my fingers! Just another step closer.

With this surgery coming closer and closer I have to take charge and make some of the changes I have been avoiding to make. With or without the surgery these changes need to be made for my health. As much as it might be hard and not fun at first I will do it and keep trying until I succeed.

First thing I am committing to is going on the treadmill every day. Even if it is for 10 minutes. Just need to get moving and get in that routine. Went on there last night 10 minutes while dinner was cooking, Gage was in his highchair watching me laughing and Max was looking sideways at the treadmill moving. I really don't mind working out, but I know I gave up on it right before I got pregnant with Gage because I wasn't seeing any results. I was only eating 1500 calories a day and working out 7 days a week doing treadmill and cardio and nothing. So I gave up. I want to create the habit now and plus they recommend it anyways. I need to quit making excuses and just do it. I always claim I am too busy or not enough time and really I can make time and fit it into my daily schedule. I did before and I can now.

Second thing I am trying to give up is drinking Diet Coke. I love Diet Coke. It's my enemy I swear (HA HA). I am on day three of having no Diet Coke at all. I have been drinking water all day and in the evening I have one glass of ice tea. I am trying to get more water everyday. For the last few weeks at work I bring in my big cup I got in the hospital and I try to drink atleast one of those while at work. It holds 34oz. Ideally I want to get to the point I am drinking two of these a day. I am shocked I have done good the last three days without a drop of Diet Coke. I know I won't give it up totally but want to slow way down on it and only have it once in awhile, I was drinking atleast a couple of glasses a day. Might of been the reason why I feel so bloated all the time. I know Ice Tea isn't the greatest either but sometimes you need to have someone besides water. I love water, as long as its ice cold I can drink it all day.

Third thing I am going to give up is smoking. I did good and quit when I was pregnant with Gage and planned to remain a quitter. But when he was born early, the whole NICU experience had my so stressed out and worked up I started again. I know I am making excuses but I am being honest with why I started again. I don't smoke like I use to prior to pregnancy. I was an almost a pack a day smoker. Since Gage was born I probably only smoke 5 a day. Most people would say why not just quit. If it was only that easy. Honestly. This is the one thing I truly regret in my life every picking up, its been a demon from hell to try to battle. But I will do it. I have to do it. I am giving myself until April 30th to quit. I am telling myself in order to have surgery I have to quit by this day or I can't have surgery. It's motivation. Plus who knows maybe after meeting with my surgeon on Friday he may tell me to quit ASAP or he won't do surgery. And like I did when I found out I was pregnant and had to quit, I paid attention to when I was about to smoke, was it out of habit or because I truly wanted one. 90% of the time was just out of habit and not because I wanted one. Paying attention to that made it very easy to quit plus being pregnant did too. So I am doing that this time as well. I haven't had a smoke in over 14 hrs. I typically have one on my way to work, I didn't this morning. I didn't want one, I only do it because it's habit. So it's helping me out a lot to pay attention to that.

Those are the first three things I am committing to working on. Sure there will be more to come but I want to commit to these three first.