PkSteph
It's past midnight
Dec 28, 2011
My daughter is right. I do need things to be perfect. It is past midnight right now and I am going over my paperwork for my first consultation with Dr. Kim. lol I'm trying to write out my "what you hope to achieve" page sound "perfect". My tendency is to write everything like a speechwriter... or a fiery stump speechwriter. It wasn't something I learned. It s just what I am.. I guess. Maybe, I am campaigning for a new life? haha (I find it funny that the spell check doesn't have the word bariatric. I'm glad I didn't do it automatically or I would be having "barbaric" surgery. hahaha Yeah... I hope it's more civilized.)Here is what I wrote:
The first time I had heard the word "Obese" to describe me was at 5 years old at my Kindergarten school exam. Dr. Allan Freeman put down that I was "a well, slightly obese child". I have the outpatient treatment records from when I was a child to prove it. I have been fighing with my weight since I can remember. I've always been self-conscious It has affected me physically, mentally and socially all my life. I believe it made growing up a military brat harder as I spent a good portion of my teens quite depressed.
Problems were starting to creep up on my lab tests starting around age 28. My triglycerides skyrocketed. My TSH was bad. Cholesterol was bad. My good cholesterol was low. I was getting migraines. I was snoring more than ever and I kept getting this painful rash on my upper thighs/creases, but, I was too embarrassed to ever mention these to a doctor. This is when I found out I was hypothyroid.
From 2002 to till 2007 I tried all kinds of diets from seeing a dietician, doing low carb, low fat, and low calorie diets on my own. None really helped me lose much weight, except for weight watchers. I did lose some weight, but, stall for a long time no matter what I did. Finally, I ended up breaking a foot exercising. The weight came back quickly when I quit.
Here I am years later still morbidly obese. I still have those heath problems from years ago - high triglycerides, low HDL, snoring, upper thigh rashs in skin folds, migraines - plus for the last 6 months my blood pressure has been regularly around 140/95.
What's different now? I'm beginning to deal with them instead of being embarrassed and during my head in the virtual sand. I finally had a sleep test done recently that showed I DO have Obstruction Sleep Apnea and probably have it for years. I take fish oil and Vit. D pills with my Armour thyroid pills to try to help my D deficiency and heart health. I exercise. I even went as far as to join the "North Texas Derby Revolution" in Denton a few months ago, and, it is REALLY tough lugging so much extra weight and skate. Also, I am actually less self-conscience than I have ever been in my life, and, I have finally admitted to myself that I need help because the weight will not come off.
How will WLS change my life? I hope to use this tool to help me FINALLY lose the extra pounds, and, to get down to a reasonable healthy weight! I want to stop snoring like a train and annoying everyone in my house at night! (Not to mention to not wake up with a headache!) I want my lab tests to come back normal. I need my blood pressure to go back to normal. I want to feel good in my skin! I want to be able to do crossovers on my skates without my stomach getting in the way! I want to be able to get off the floor easily at derby practice after I fall (intentionally or not). Most of all I want to show my 11 year old daughter what her mother has the potential to be without being literally weight down and annoyed with herself all the time. I want to be as active as I can while she is young enough to want to hang out with mom, yet, old enough to remember and build healthy habits of her own.
I am ready and willing to commit to the program I will have to follow before and after bariatric surgery.
