Update to post plastic thoughts...

Apr 09, 2012

So it's been almost six weeks and things are much improved.  Between my bony hips and firm mattress, I still have a few tender spots around the incision.  I think it's mostly a matter of sleeping in the same spot for too long and fluids just tend to pool in the area.    Occasionally if I stretch too far, I'll feel a stinging sensation above the actual scar, which leads me to believe there is some scar tissue forming.   But the more active I am and the more my massage therapist works on it, the less that happens. 

Between the doctor I go to for acupuncture, another for my testosterone pellets, and my massage therapist - they are all very impressed with how well the incision is healing.  So that just reinforces what my plastic surgeon tells me when I see him.   Which I'll see him again a week from tomorrow.  He's not happy with the way my right breast is settling so there may be a minor revision in my near future.  I just hope it can be done with a local and not a general anesthesia.

I've been able to wear my usual size 4 jeans since just a couple of weeks after the surgery, although I had to hold off a little longer on some of my lower cut ones because the waist band sits right at the incision in some spots.  Mostly I still live in yoga pants because they don't irritate the incision at all.   I love the way things fit now, I'm so happy to no longer have a muffin top.   Soooo happy.  Did I mention I'm happy??? 

So I have to be honest that the farther out from surgery I get, the happier I am with the results.  My boobs are still bigger than I wanted, but fortunately I'm so tall and big boned, they don't look abnormal.  It's just weird to look in the mirror and see them, the incredibly flat stomach and the incision...none of that looks normal to me and I jokingly refer to myself as a praying mantis - a top heavy stick figure.   Anyway, it was still a heckuva lot to put my body through, maybe I did too much at once, or maybe if I didn't do it all at once, it wouldn't have all been done!   But I think ultimately I will be able to say I am glad I did it.  Especially when I have on a bra & underwear and can't see the scars at all, that's when I feel more normal.  Which is ironic because part of the reason I had this done was so I would feel as confident naked as I did in clothes - and that hasn't been the case.   At least not yet.  Sometimes I wonder if I'll ever be happy with my body! 

I feel like I've whined here and in my forum posts about the recovery being worse than I expected.  Reality was, it was worse than I expected.  Was it unbearable or god awful?  No...and yes (tee hee).  But I like to be able to prepare myself mentally and I just wasn't this time around.  Had I been, I think the recovery would have been less STRESSful for me and I probably would have sailed through it easier.  I have many friends in the medical field that tell me being prepared and having the right mental attitude is crucial to the recovery process.  I just wasn't totally on my game in that regard.  Damn, I guess I am human after all...who knew?  LOL.

Even this far out, I still tire out pretty easily.  Between the occasional discomfort and my evil cat, I can't remember the last time I slept solidly through the entire night.  So I nap most days for an hour or two and that helps.  My first workout with my trainer on Thursday was an easy one, but I was winded.  The second one Saturday was closer to normal and I realized I've lost a lot of my strength, which was to be expected after not working out for most of 6-8 weeks (I missed two weeks prior to surgery for vacation and had some back issues between vacation and surgery so my work outs were sporadic).   It'll come back pretty quickly, but my biggest challenge is learning to trust my body again and not to be sooo cautious.  I'm very timid doing a lot of things out of FEAR that it might hurt, but it doesn't actually hurt. 

So to sum it all up, I'm looking forward to feeling normal again - whatever that is.  I'm looking forward to regaining my muscle strength, regaining my confidence, improving my alignment and flexibility again and to the scar ultimately fading.   My husband seems to think I'll be sporting a two piece around the pool this year, but I don't think so.  For one, I've got some scars from the drainage tubes and around the belly button and the sun isn't good for them.  Second, I'm 51, and just because I CAN wear a bikini doesn't mean I SHOULD.   But hey, never say never!  I never thought I'd get a boob job either!

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