Is this really me?

Oct 01, 2010

So here I am working my way to my five month mark and I feel great. I haven't physically felt this good in a long time. I can play with the kids and love with hubby, but I find myself not loving me. I know that this is all a process and it will come but I honestly hate the way i look. I hat the fat I hate the forskin that is just hanging there and I hate the way clothes look on me. My kids love that mom is feeling good and hubby loves that we can do more but what about me. what do i love? how can i feel this way when I really am trying to be a better person. OK so hormones are probally runing my show tonight but I cant help it. I feel so......lost. But so far I am down to 260lbs and I haven't seen that in so long. I was pregnant with my second kid when I last weighed in at 260.  My legs feel great and I love to walk every where I cant stand to sit still anymore and I just have the need to go everywhere. is this what I have been missing all these years? I guess so. OK so i have stopped the crying and blubbering so I will this I do not regret ever having this surgery and I would so do it again.

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