A lifetime of being obese

Apr 27, 2010

"Obese", I can vividly remember going to my pediatrician when I was about 7 and him telling my mother that I was "obese".  I've never liked the word since.  I knew it meant I was overweight or fat but obese made it seem nasty and degrading.  Hind sight being 20/20 maybe some where in my head whenever a doctor said that I was obese to me over the years I just tuned it out.  I don't know but today I can say the words and feel it, "I'm morbidly obese!"

Over the years I'd seen and heard stories about people having WLS and although the weight loss was impressive it never really moved or motivated me.  Not until, October of 2009.  A friend told me she had just gotten her surgery date to have RNY and for some reason it sparked my attention.  I listened closely to her struggles and story and was surprisingly inspired and moved.  She gave me the contact information of her surgery team and I called the same day to make an appointment.  Only to find out I needed to attended an orientation class, well I put it off in October, November, December, January and finally February. 

In the meantime my friend had her procedure in early November and I saw her in January, wow what a difference.  By March I was determined not to put off my orientation a day longer, so on March 18th I attended my first orientation.  I left feeling excited and hopeful.  I was pretty sure my insurance covered the surgery but the next morning I called to check.  There were now so many things I needed to accomplish before my paper work could be submitted to the insurance company starting with my first surgery consult.  I made the appoint for Friday, April 30th at 1:30pm.  I'm am so very excited and ready. 

I went to a 50th Birthday Celebration on Saturday and as I was getting dressed I couldn't believe how big I'd gotten.  When I was a little girl my Aunt often called me "Pleasing and Plump" well the terrible thing I realized that now I was "Disgusting and Fat".  I'm sure others have there own thoughts about my appearance but I never really cared.  But now I care about what I think and I don't like it and want to make a change in my life.  My weight never affected my health but now it does and I want to live to see and enjoy my 50th Birthday in 2 years and many more.  I want to start enjoying the things in life I was never able to do.

I found this website while looking for stories from other WLS patients and I love it.  I decided like most that I should record my journey for inspiration.....my own and others.  So keep me in your prayers and thoughts.  Feel free to leave comments and encouraging words.

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