zereul007
New Year...New Me!
Jan 03, 2010
Well 2010 is finally here and it's time to start with the resolutions!!!
I'm actually writing today with a bit of an emotional down. I'm thinking it's probably because I've been on holiday vacations for 2 weeks and have behaved rather badly according to my own standards. I've picked at this and that...nibbled here and there...tested my tool and the bad part is that I KNOW I shouldn't have done that. The only good thing about having ventured through this trial has been that my weight has remained consistent at 258. I haven't exercised in the last month like I should have due to many factors, none of which I would consider a valid enough reason or excuse. However, work stress has been at the forefront. And with it getting darker earlier, by the time I get home I feel so bummed out that I just want to take a moment to catch my breath from the day's events.
So starting this new year, I am dedicating myself to making a change in so many things regarding my internal and external self. I have to. I've come too far to just resort back to the "same ol', same ol'". I'm torturing myself over these holidays and memorializing it with today's journal entry will by my final stab at myself.
Now to the obvious...
This year I will work on the following intrinsically geared goals:
* To appreciate myself for having lost close to 100 pounds...it's no small feat!
* To love who I see in the mirror during this amazing transformation
* To see past the old, pre-RNY reflection in the mirror and truly see the "real", new me
* To be a better listener, both with people and with my pouch, named "Wilma"
* To be happy with this life I have chosen for me because I worked so hard to get here!
As for the outside work on me, I will
* Definitely not test my pouch to the limits
* Dedicate myself to exercise more...
* Eat better according to my diet - that means NO CARBS!!
* Follow my regimen of WPEN: Water, Protein, Exercise, No snacking!!
* Work towards my OH Goals...
* Be more confident in my abilities as a professional and be outspoken when needed
* Offer myself openly to new friendships
* ENJOY LIFE!!! Because you only get one shot and before you know it, it's over.
Thank you to my OH friends, because I see your progress and it gives me hope that I can continue on the path towards my personal success. I do understand that we all have moments where we want to feel "normal" again, and so we stray off our path. But I don't ever want to go back to who I was Pre-RNY. Even after losing 85 pounds, I feel a little more normal when I go out on the town. Before I always felt people stared at my weight. I prefer to think of people staring at me NOW because they KNOW how much weight I've lost so far (or because I look good and give off a feel good persona! Haahaa) I don't feel the stares as much as before and it feels good knowing that I may actually be fitting into the "norm". Going from a size 28 to a size 16/18 is a wonderful feeling, I can't lie. I just need my damn mind to get with it and relish in this beautiful metamorphosis!!
I wish all my OH friends and their families a wonderful, peaceful, healthy New Year!!!
This is our year to shine!!!
Lisa
