ChristieS.
4/29/06
I've been battling weight all my life and I'm just so tired of being the fat person in my family. My whole family. 4 brothers and they are all skinny. Mom struggles a bit but she keeps her weight under control. Dad has never had a problem. Family get-togethers are always incredibly humiliating experiences for me. I try my best to smile and pretend, but it's getting harder and harder. I went over 200 lbs at the age of 21 and the only time I've been under again was about 7 years ago. I divorced my ex-husband and went on this drastic diet for a year. I think it was the only way I could feel in control of my life. Things were awful for me. I moved my kids back to the Charlotte area and used my anger at my ex-husband to stay motivated to diet and excercise. It worked well for awhile. I lost 157 lbs and actually had plastic surgery to remove excess skin. Then I met my new husband. He is a wonderful man and a great father to my kids. Things went well for about 7 months - until I got pregnant again. I was devastated. I had worked so hard to get control over my lifestyle habits and I new what pregnancy would do. I gained 57 lbs in those 9 months. After our daughter was born, I suffered from post-partum depression and just kept on eating. It took 6 months for me to get brave enough to see a Dr. and get medicine. After 7 months the Dr. said I should try slowly going off the drugs and I did. I no longer suffer from depression, but I'm up to 256 lbs now. I've been trying for the last 5 years to find the strength to lose the weight again, but I can't. Throughout all of this, I have had numerous hernias. They've had to be repaired 4 times. I now have a gaping hole in my abdominal wall covered with mesh. My surgeon, Dr. Zweng, feels that WLS will not only help with weight loss and arthritis in my knees but also with the hernias. He has noticed that people who lose the weight generally have longer-term hernia repair success. However, I will have to have the surgery done open because of the mesh and scar tissue. In my little bit of research, I've noticed that open WLS leads to excess scar-tissue and hernias and that scares the he** out of me! So...I continue to research, talk to people, and try to think logically about what to do. I have gone ahead with the 3 month diet/excercise/psych regimen to get insurance approval. I want this surgery more than anything, but I want to be sure it won't do more harm than good. Any ideas????
Oh yeah...almost forgot. I went to the nutritionist a week ago and I had lost 6 lbs. Good for me!!!
5/5/06
Well, today I finished up my final meeting with my Nutritionist. I had final visits with my Excercise Physiologist and Psychologist this week also. I've had an Endoscopy (from which came a prescription of Prevacid , thank you very much!), an EKG, a chest x-ray, and more blood drawn than I would have thought possible! All I have to do now is wait. I spoke with Angela at Presbyterian Bariatric today and I do need to contact my PCP again about finding documentation of my weight in 2001. Hopefully I can find what she needs. Things seem to slowly be moving along. I'm starting to worry that I might not be able to get everything set up for surgery this summer. I guess I should have known that would be a problem. I just hoped that it would be possible. I'm worrying so much that now I'm having dreams about it. Last night I dreamed that I had to fight Aetna for 3 years to get approval. Then I had the surgery, had major complications, and just as I was starting to live again, the news announced that they had developed a "miracle" diet pill that would cause you to lose 10 pounds every time you took it. I woke up as I was dreaming of throwing the lamp at the newslady. LOL! I need to RELAX about this.
On a good note - I was weighed again and lost 3 more pounds! Woohoo!!!
5/6/06
Well, today was my oldest's first prom. She looked gorgeous, if I do say so myself! I know she had fun and her date was a great guy. I'm just having a little trouble realizing that the child I gave birth to is now all grown up. I cried like a baby after they left. I can't imagine how bad I'll be at her wedding :) Anyway, here's a picture of her:
5/8/06
I spoke with Angela at the Bariatric Center and she received everything that I had the PCP fax over. I also had weights sent from my Ob/gyn. Not really sure what good they'll do because they are all pregnant weights, but at least they are in her hands. I guess she could tell I'm really worried because she said, "Don't worry. You will NOT be my first Aetna denial!" I will say an extra prayer tonight that she's right. I think I'm very lucky to have her on my side :)
I've been thinking about my list of dreams. Here goes:
1. Go to a family get-together and NOT be the heaviest. DONE!!!
2. Be able to keep up with my 4 year old. DONE - I run everyday on the treadmill!
3. Sit in a plastic chair or aluminum beach chair and not worry about breaking it. Hehehe...NOT A PROBLEM!
4. Shop for clothes in a regular store. DONE - I wear 8's or 10's!!! 5. Buy bras that my husband won't call "Over the shoulder double boulder holders" HMMMM - Done - I think. Aren't 36C's normal? 6. Get up in the morning and not have my knees/feet hurt.
7. Get home from work and not have my knees/feet hurt. DONE! I'm like the energizer bunny! 8. Sit "Indian style" on the floor with my kindergarteners. :( Never going to happen. I messed up my hip too much for this one!) 9. Walk without the "Old Lady" shuffle. DONE!
10. Start living again! DONE
5/20/06
Well, well, well! What an eventful week this has been. I started calling the Bariatric center on Monday to make sure everything from my 3 month inter-disciplinary study was in and I could schedule my follow up appointment. On Monday, they were still missing my Phsyc. evaluation. When I called back on Thursday I was told they had EVERYTHING! YEAH!!!! But, when I tried to schedule the appointment, I was told that the center is closing and Dr. Zweng would only be scheduling his appointments through Charlotte Surgical. OH NO! I've dealt with that office before and knew how long that could take. I came home from work Thursday and just cried to my hubby. And being the white knight that he is for me, he got on the phone with Charlotte Surgical and explained everything. They said that since they were only 2 floors below the bariatric center they would walk up and personally pick up all my paperwork. They also gave me an appointment for the NEXT DAY!!! So, I met with Dr. Zweng yesterday. It turns out they can't find the report from my Endoscopy. Don't know why since that was done over a month ago? Dr. Zweng got on the phone right then and asked that it be faxed over immediately. The one thing that Endoscopy Dr. said was that I should have a sleep apnea test done. Hmmmmmm...this is almost a deal breaker for me. I do NOT want to spend the night with a strange man watching me sleep. I guess I'll find the courage to do it, but I really don't want to. The rest of the appointment went fine, though. Dr. Zweng has dictated my final letter and everything is winging its way to Aetna right now. PLEASE say a prayer for me! I don't know why, but I don't have a good feeling about this. I just can't help thinking that it's going to take a lonnnnnnnng time for them to say, "Nope!" I hope I'm wrong!!!
PS - on a positive note - I am still 7 pounds down!!! I was very afraid I had actually gained weight. Yay, me!
Here are the reasons I really want this surgery:
Sarah (14), Emma (4), Lindsay (17) and Sam (13) on a once-in-a-lifetime cruise.
My husband, Michael, and I dancing on the same cruise.
5/26/06
What a difference a week makes! I was told the sleep study wouldn't hold us back any..that they could just get it done while the insurance was thinking about my case. WRONG! They called to tell me my consultation appt. was set for July 11 and that I would actually have the sleep study around the first of August. Yikes! I am supposed to be back at work on the first of August. Thank goodness for Lisa @ Charlotte Surgical. She went to bat for me and told the Sleep Dr's office that my surgery was scheduled and I simply had to have the consultation and study (if needed) before the surgery date. LOL...I was laughing as she told me all this, because I didn't even have a date scheduled. Anyway, they got me a consultation appt of June 1st AND said that if a sleep study was needed it would be done the following Monday. Woohoo!!! Thank you, Lisa!!! To top it all off, Lisa has given me a tentative DATE of July 3rd!!!! OMG!!! I was absolutely speechless. Then...I couldn't stop saying "THANK YOU, THANK YOU! Happy 4th of July to me!" Of course, it is contingent on getting insurance approval. I'm so worried. I still don't have a good feeling about my insurance. Aetna has been known to be difficult. Keep your fingers crossed and the prayers coming.
Have a wonderful Holiday weekend!!!! Peace,
Christie
6/5/06
Well, I just got home from the Sleep Study. Oh my. Not fun at all. I was told I slept a little over 3 1/2 hours all night and never actually got to REM sleep. Now they are saying I might have to start the whole thing over again. I have never been more self-conscious in my life. I guess that's why I couldn't sleep. The tech said she would send the report to the Dr's office, but that it might not be enough because I didn't sleep enough. We'll see. Otherwise, I should be 100% complete with all pre-surgery testing!
6/15/06
Happy Birthday to me, happy birthday to me, happy Birrrrrthday to meeeeeeeeeee, happy birthday to me! LOL...I am sooo happy! I got a phone call today from Dr. Zweng's office. I am APPROVED!!! Whoohoo! AND...my new surgery date is June 28th! YIKES!!!!! Apparently, Dr. Zweng is on vacation the week of July 3rd and they had a cancellation for June 28th. Sooo...I can eat my birthday cake today, but tomorrow is the beginning of my 2 week liquid diet. Hehehe, I have to go shopping tonight. WOOHOO!!!!!
PS - today really is my birthday. What a birthday present!
6/19/06
Today is day 4 of the liquid "fast" and it sucks! I'm serious. All of these protein shakes have such a sicky sweet metalic taste. I admit to occasionally having some sugar free/fat free pudding and I also found out that Dilworth Coffee shop makes a killer sugar free protein shake! The only problem is that it costs about $4 and I can't afford to do 5 of those a day. I keep reading that the purpose of this liquid diet is to shrink the liver so that surgery will be done laparscopically, but I've already been told mine will be open. So why the fast??? I want to call and ask that so badly, but I know I shouldn't so I don't. I'm pretty miserable though. On a good note, I've lost all the weight I had regained in the last few weeks (9 pounds!) I'm just trying to stay busy. 9 more days till surgery. Woohoo!!!!!
I want to take a minute now to say thank you to everyone that has given me support. You all are the BEST!!! I know I wouldn't have made it if you hadn't helped. HUGS!!!!
Peace
6/23/06
Today is the day I go back to Dr. Zweng for my final pre-op appointment. I'm a little worried because I started out losing with a bang, but I've really slowed down. Now, I know I lost 9 right off the bat, but that was weight I had gained since seeing Dr. Zweng last. Today I had finally lost 2 more pounds. I'm afraid Dr. Zweng will only see that I've lost 2 pounds and think I've been really cheating. Luckily my husband will be there to vouch for me. I went on Wednesday for my pre-op at the hospital. The Dr. that talked to me about anesthesia made me feel so much better. He said that most of the people who come in for bypass surgery are very, very unhealthy. Then he said that I was the opposite and that he was proud of me for dealing with my weight before my health was bad! Gee that was nice. In the 5 months that I've been working on this, I've often heard, "You're not sick enough to need this surgery." So, this was a nice twist. Anyway, all they did at the hospital was ask me a few questions, draw one vial of blood and send me home. No EKG, no chest Xray, nothing. Guys and Gals, my surgery is only FIVE days away. Count them, 1,2,3,4,5!!! Woohoo!!!!!!!!! I am really psyched. Ok, got to run. I'll post later when I'm back from my appointment.
Peace.
6/27/06
Well, tomorrow is D Day!!! (or S day!) I went to see Dr. Zweng last Friday and it was just as I thought...He didn't really think I'd stuck to the diet because he only saw that I lost 2 pounds. Oh well. I know that I've done a good job with the diet. Since last Friday I've lost 3 more pounds. Not too bad! I'm so ready to be finished with this liquid diet!!! I hate this stuff and I want something salty and chewy. I still have to pack my bag, pack my kid's bags for when they leave with their grandmother on Thursday, and clean the house. Guess I'd better get busy! At least I bought all the protein and vitamins earlier. See you all on the loser side!!!!!!
Peace.
7/5/06
Happy Belated 4th of July! I am officially 1 week post-op. Overall, things have gone well. Surgery went much better than Dr. Zweng thought it would go. The hospital stay was not too bad. I had excellent nurses and techs...especially the night ladies, Brandi and Brandy! They were awesome! The pain was tolerable with Torodol. I gave up the morphine almost immediately because it didn't touch the pain, and it made me feel awful. However, when Dr. Zweng removed the little golfball-sized pump that shoots pain meds straight into the inscision, the pain tripled! He tells me it shouldn't have mattered because it was empty, but the nurse disagreed and my belly was screaming! At any rate, I've been slowly getting better. Each day is a little easier and I feel more and more human. I did make one trip back to the hospital when I started having horrible sharp pains in my right ribcage when I breathed. Dr. Zweng was worried that I might have a blood clot so I had to go back for a c scan. I was dehydrated and they had to stick 6 times to finally get the IV in. I was so out of it and tired of all the crap, all I could do was cry and say I wanna go home. In the end, no blood clots. YAY! So, I'm home and feeling better, but starting to feel a little hungry. Up till now, food has had no appeal to me. BUT - there were a million 4th of July food commercials on yesterday and I WANTED a hamburger. Probably just all in my head, but it got to me. I am proud of myself for finally getting all my protein in yesterday. I have to make very small shakes (4 oz) but I make sure each one has 19-20 g of protein. Yesterday I had 3 so that should = 60 g's of protein!!! Now my issue is trying to figure out how to get all the supplements in during a regular working day. It's not going to be easy. At any rate, my husband has already noticed the weight-loss, especially in my face. Altogether, from my starting weight, I think I've lost about 17 pounds! And I know I've still got some swelling from the surgery. We'll see what the scales say when I go back for my check-up on Thursday. At any rate, I'm a LOSER!!!
7/6/06
First follow-up appointment at the surgeon's office went well. Staples out. Officially down 21 pounds from my starting weight. (12 pounds from surgery weight! - in 8 days!) Overall, Dr. Zweng seems pleased. I know I am!
Later on - well the bottom 2 inches of my inscision opened up again and the steri-strips came off. (guess the staples came out too early?) YUCK! Now it's just nasty. DH bought some butterfly closers that seem to be helping and I'm keeping it covered. We'll see.
8/29/06
Wow! I had no idea it had been this long since I posted. YIKES! I had my 2+month checkup today and I guess things are going well. I had lost 23 lbs at my one month appt. and this month I've lost 16 more. So my total is 39 lbs from surgery date and 48 lbs total! I had really hoped to be at 50, but oh well. I told the Dr. that I'm very concerned because I have NO PROBLEMS eating...at all. I've yet to eat anything that doesn't suit me, and I never feel full. In other words, I've lost this much weight because I've been so careful about measuring and eating the right foods. But how long can I keep this up? I'm obviously not very good at it, or I wouldn't have needed this surgery to begin with. I'm not sure that the Dr. understood what I was trying to say. He seemed to take it personally. What I was really trying to say was that he did too good of a job! At any rate, his answer was to send me to the Psych again. LOL...so now I'll be a fat, worried person with a HUGE psych bill! I also begged the Dr to give me the green light to start some different exercises, but he basically ignored me and said, "Walk, walk, walk!" I HATE it! And I don't have enough free time in the day to get enough walking in. Surely there is something I can do that burns as many calories in half the time!
Ok, now that I've gotten all that off my chest, I can relax. Hopefully I'll be back soon! Take care...
PS - To make myself feel better, I stopped on the way home at the mall and shopped! (I know, I know...a terrible thing to do!) This was my first shopping spree since surgery and it was FUN! I went from a size 24 in pants to a size 16! Woohoo! However, I'm still a tub up top. I only went from a 24/26 to a 20/22. What I would give to loose the twins, too!!!!! I'll try to post a new picture soon with my new clothes! My signature picture doesn't even look like me anymore. I've lost most of those chipmunk cheeks and that HUGE double/triple chin!
9/29/06
3 MONTH CHECKUP: Wow! Things have finally started moving again. I got so frustrated that I went back on liquid protein supplements and the weight finally started coming off. I'm officially in ONE-derland!!! 198!!! Yes, that's right...I said...ONE HUNDRED and ninety eight pounds. Woohoo! Over all, everything is going well. However, I was really sad to hear Dr. Zweng will no longer be a practicing surgeon. He has taken a job as a big-wig over a bunch of local hospitals so I'll have to move to Dr. Voellinger's office. I'm sure he is just as good, but I'll miss Dr. Zweng and his nurse. Anyway, I'm feeling good and finally below 200. I can't really wrap my mind around that !!!
Peace :) 12/22/06 6 MONTH CHECKUP: Things are going very well! I've lost 92 pounds and feel really good. My bloodwork was perfect! The only negative thing is the hernia that I've been having problems with. It was supposed to be repaired today, but I'm putting it off due to the fact that I wouldn't be home for Christmas. It will have to be fixed in the next month, however. Dr. V did tell me that I will probably not loose a lot more. He said I've already lost more than 80% of my excess weight and the average for RNY patiens is only 75%. I was a little bummed by this. Now I'm determined to prove him wrong!!!
1/2/07 - UPDATE: I just got home from a week at Kiawah Island and I have great news! I was terrified to get on the scale because I just knew that I'd gained weight from all that I ate and drank over New Years, but guess what? I LOST 4 POUNDS! That makes my total 96. I am so close to making the century club! I will prove Dr. V wrong! LOL, I think that's exactly why he tells his patients that they are probably almost finished with weight loss. HAPPY NEW YEAR, everyone!
1/16/07 - HERNIA SURGERY UPDATE: I ended up having surgery on Jan. 9th. Things are going fairly well except that I actually gained weight! LOL...I'm not sure how since I didn't eat anything for days, but I gained 4 pounds. Maybe it's swelling, or maybe not. At any rate it's taken me until today to lose it all back. So, as of today, I have officially lost 100 POUNDS!!!!! Just saying that makes me feel incredibly happy and incredibly sad at the same time. Happy because I'm a different person, and sad because I hate that I ever let myself get that way. Life is good. Thank you, Dr. Zweng. Thank you, Dr. V. Thank you, God! I am blessed.
4/5/07- Well, it's official! I am at my goal of 145 and below my surgeon's goal of 150. Dr. V asked me today how I was doing on my maintainence diet and I didn't have an answer. It occurred to me that I don't know what that is. I've only ever understood two types of eating: pigging out or dieting. What is a maintanence diet? I'm going to have to figure that out pretty soon or I'll either end up losing too much or gaining a bunch back. YIKES!!! BTW - I will try hard to get a recent picture on here. It's April and the latest pic I have on here is from October. Things have changed a bit since then!!!!
5/13/07 - HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY! This has been the best weekend! It started yesterday with my oldest daughter coaching her 5 year old sister in a soccer game, (they lost terribly but who cares!) then my 5 year old had a dance recital (without a doubt the most fun I've had in years!) and then my oldest daughter had her senior prom. Not even the rain could ruin that! We had 6 couples (and their parents) at our house taking pictures. It was a perfect way to sail into Mother's Day. I am so proud of my children and all they have accomplished. They are all different and all wonderful. I didn't even cry after they all left in the limo. Now, graduation is 2 weeks away. I KNOW I'll cry then. Oh well! As for my weight, I am now down to 139. I still have trouble saying that with a 1 and not a 2. (as in 239!) My BMI is 23.1. This is what I had hoped and prayed for - A BMI that was low enough that I had some wiggle room. What a wonderful gift!!! Thank you, Dr. Zweng...thank you DH...thank you, God!!! Have a happy day, everyone!
7/30/07 - HELLO! I can't believe I've let so many months go without posting. I even missed my 1 year surgi-versary! Things are going so well. I had my 1 year apt. and my labs were PERFECT! No problems at all. I now weigh 133 lbs. I'm exercising 60-80 minutes a day - usually a walk/run combination. I also lift weights on other days to build muscle. I'm going to weight watchers to help lost the last 5 lbs or so and to encourage my daughters to eat the right way. They have jumped right into the point system and are doing really well. I hope they can learn how to eat healthily from this plan, because they sure as heck can't learn it from me. I'm still struggling to learn what a "NORMAL" person eats to maintain. I really don't need to lose anymore weight. My BMI is 22.1. That's perfect for me! I'm well below the limit but not dangerously low. If only I could figure out how to eat to stay here? I almost panic if I allow myself to eat anything that isn't "diet'. I guess it will just take time. I've been thinking a lot about writing to Dr. Zweng to say thank you. I haven't seen him since he retired from surgery. I would like him to know that it worked and he did an excellent job. He now heads a department in the corporation that runs several of the local hospitals. Maybe I could help with information seminars for future WLS patients?? LOL...I was such an emotional nutcase during the whole WLS process in his office that I doubt he would want me within a hundred miles of any WLS seminar. But it will make me feel better to thank him. I'm not sure I ever remembered to do that in person.
Okay, I've rambled enough for one post. I'm so thrilled with life now! If you're reading this and considering WLS, email me with any questions. It can make a world of difference. Good luck!
11/10/07 - Well, long time no see! Life is so hectic these days that I seldom get to linger here anymore. I've been maintaining my weight anywhere from 129 to 133. I exercise like a mad woman and today I ran a 5K and finished it in 31 minutes!!!!!! Woohoo! Not only that, but I beat my DH! LOL....I will never let him live that down. I love this surgery and what it's done for me. Happy day to you all!
Photos
 260 Dancing with Hubby on Cruise. Began thinking about WLS about a week before this! |
 |
