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I am relizing that the surgery did not cure all that helped make me fat. I have some really bad eating habbits that I still strugle with. I still want to eat when I am bored,sad,mad. I find myslef in the tug of war in my head saying "your not really hungery A" your just upset or bored,but it dont make it any easyer. I find myself wanting more and more to have a stiff drink,but I dont. I find myself kinda lonley now that thing's are going well for me health wise and mentaly.I am wondering why that is,I thought it would be the other way around. Oh well mabye this is just a faze.

Hello all my OH friend's today is Sunday what a day it has been so far. I am thinking as I type how I want to express how I am feeling. I am feeling confused at the moment about how the people in my life are feeling about me and my weightloss. I have had so much support that I dont want to be overshadowed by the people around me that I feel are testing me and my emotions. I hope that my faith keeps my lifted and I dont take everything to heart. I feel like as I have  changed so have the people around me,for the good and the bad. I am feeling like the happier I get the more chalangeing my relationships have become. I feel like screaming ! 

Well people I have had the surgery and am almost three month's out. I have lost a total of 72lb's as of now,wow that's a crazy number. I am thrilled and have had a wonderful summer and done more thing's in the last two month's then I have done in years. I did not have a long recovery and have had no surgery related problem's. I feel so blessed to have been given the chance to get back in the game of life. I have so much more weight to lose and I have goles that I want to reach by this time next year. I thank my family and friend's for all the support and I will keep everyone updated.

HOLLY S*** I got my surgery date today.It is set for June 27 and I am so excited and nervas all at the same time.I know most of you know exactly what I am talking about. if anyone has any tips on how to take care of myself before and after I would love to know any tip's.

Well people,I have eaten more food this last week then I have since I started this whole diet and surgery thing.I have gone to the gym but that's going to do nothing for my weighing in on Tuesday,DAMN.Oh well I will be luckey if I stay the same weight.Now thing's are getting rough for me.My family and I BBQ all the time in the summer,what am I to do?.I need all the support I can get these day's.Oh yah,I am going to meet with my surgen Dr. Shikora in two week's and will hopefully get a surgery date.I was so excited that they thought I have compleated the first part of the program and am ready for a date.I will keep everyone updated. Happy Mother's day to all the mom's out there!!!!!

Well this is the deal people,I gained 3 pounds on tuesday.I was shocked.I smiled the whole group and lost it after.I saw my nutrisionest and she sat  me down and just lisen to me cry and reminded me what I needed to do to lose the weight.She never once made me feel like gaining the weight was a failure.I also took with me that day a few reality checks.
               1. I will gain weight,and lose it again
               2.It's ok to cry and think it's a really big deal
               3.This is for life
               4.GET BACK UP AND KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK!

PS.what do others out there do to deal with what may seem like a road block in this weight loss journey?

Well people,keeping up the good work has gotten easyer with all the support I am reciveing from the people that I meet through OH and the Obecity center at NEMC.My new gole these day's are to take small bite's and make my meal's last for twenty miniout's.Let me tell you,that is no easy task.I really thought these docters were just not really understanding exactly how small those frozen meals realy are.Well I said to myself, Adriana, you have done everything they have asked you do to so far why not try this.So starting Tuesday I got home form my weekly meeting and took my little meal and started the small bite's.The meal lasted about ten miniout's.dinner time came around and the meal lasted about fifteen miniouts.today is Thursday and my meals are lasting twenty miniout's.WOW,it freaken worked!!! LOL

Today I had my "Behavior Change group" and it went really well. We were missing two member's hope they did not quit on us. Anyway's I lost 3 pound's,YAHHHH HOOOO.............. lol,I really did not think I was going to lose a pound.I was so damn depressed for a few day's last week and snacked and slept for three day's non stop. I finely got out of my funk and decided to get back on track.I am really glade I did because loseing this weight is all I think about.I even went to the gym yesterday,cleaned my house and did the supper mom thing,wow what energy I have gained. I am feeling good and I will keep all the people that read this in my prayer's.  R.I.P all that were lost yesterday at V.T.

I have been at this weight loss changeing my life thing now for a little while.I really need alot of support at the moment. I do have people in my life that support me. I have a wonderful program that I am very involved in and feel very luckey to have them support me. I have few people in my life that I really trust with my feelings and thoughts about my weight loss and life changing process I am going through now . I feel that even the people in my life that I know love me and will care for me after surgery dont really know how really freaking hard this really is for me. I am feeling very alone in this weight loss  journey.