Whining Zone

Jul 11, 2010

So, I am having a lot more hormonal times now that I have my period again.  It has made my TOM (time of the month) pretty crappy.  Every month now, I have at least 3 - 5 days where I am depressed for no reason and do not want to exercise... and even worse I want to eat all day long.  I don't crave particular food or "bad" food... I just want food in me asap.  I am not sure how most people conquer this... or maybe since it's only once a month maybe normal women just eat and then work it off when the TOM is over?  I don't know.  I've definitely been allowing myself to eat more at this time, and to make excuses to not exercise since I have a headache or feel down.  I have still mostly been making more acceptable choices and still counting what I eat and writing it in my website I keep track of.  Still, it would be nice if it would go away.  I wonder if Midol helps with that too.  I'll have to look that up later.

Tomorrow I have a doctor's appointment at my lapband doctor to get my first fill.  I am nervous.  I am sad to have to go on liquids for three days again.  I am doing it because I'm eating too much.  I am not limiting myself to 1 cup of food.  I am eating until I'm satisfied... even full sometimes.  So, I'm going to make it so I will eat the right amount again.  However, I am kind of sad to do so.  More annoyingly I do have to drive 2 hours in rush hour traffic to get to my doctor.  It'll take 1.5 hours to get back since rush hour will be over.  It's just so long.  I love my doctor's office.  Everyone is great, including my doctor.  I just wish they were closer.  I wanted to bail so I wouldn't have to deal with it.  However, my husband to be gently reminded me that it's not a good idea to cancel.  I need to go.  I do love him.  How lucky am I to have his support and love in a gentle perfect manner?   

Lastly, next year at work I might be expected to teach the same thing I've been teaching for three years OR they might reassign me to a new class: 7th grade history.  I would like to teach this new class, but I will have to create a whole new curriculum.  However, I don't get to know if I have that extra work to do until they figure it out, which most likely will be a couple days before school starts.  I have NO motivations to do all the extra work just in case... but if I do change I will be stressed when I have to do all the extra work!  I'm just whining.  I know what my choices are here.  I just wish things were easier.

Those are it.  I actually have very few reasons to whine.  Most things are great.  I am on vacation from work, which is great, though I think sometimes I get a little antsy.  However, I have time to do the things I want and not just the things I have to do.  I am getting married in about 35 days, which is something incredibly exciting and happy.  I can't wait, even though it will be near the end of my vacation.  I have a new apartment, which is awesome and keeping us cool in the hot summer.  I am healthier and sorta less lazy most days (except not when I'm hormonal!).  Things are good though. 

I'm writing this to remind myself to stop letting my hormones control me.  I gotta snap out of it.  Tomorrow I will wake up at 6:30 so I can leave by 7:30 to drive all the way to Orange.  Wish me luck!  :) 

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