Starting My Journey

May 23, 2009

I have finally made a big decision and have submitted the application for Prior Approval for Out of Country OHIP approval for bariatric surgery.  I sent the forms into OHIP the third week of April.  I called the office and was told that they had sent a fax to my family Dr. requesting more information on May 4th.  I waited and finally called my Dr.'s office after two weeks.  I was told the paperwork was on the Dr.'s desk at the top of the pile and that was a good sign.  So now I wait. 

My health is steadily going down hill.  I had a consultation several years ago for bariatric surgery and did not go through with it.  I would think I can do this.  I am a rational person and I should be able to control myself enough to lose weight and live a better life.  Turns out I was wrong.  I cannot deal with this weight -- even to save my own life.  This is the heaviest weight I have ever been at.  I have spent a lifetime of dieting and trying to control my eating.  I have lost hundreds of pounds only to regain them back.  I am tired of living this way and if this surgery can give me my life back then I need to do it.

My list of medical problems seems to grow weekly.  I have had diabetes for 18 years.  I have degenerative disc disease and have been living with back pain and sciatica for years.  I have hypothyroidism, high blood pressure, high cholesterol and my kidney function is going down.  I was just diagnosed with carpal tunnel in my hands last week.  One hand is quite severe.  I have a dropped foot when I walk due to a pinched nerve in my back.  I try not to take a lot of medication for the pain.  When I have a day I do not have to any work I usually do not take any pain medication.  I do not like the way the medication makes me feel.

Well today I needed to get some work done around the house and took some pain meds early this morning.  I was out in the flower beds this morning.  I did a lot of work in a short time.  I had some beautiful light pink poppies come up that I planted from seed last year.  They are beautiful.  I wish I could do more work around the house.  My mother died last year after a brief illness.  She died here in the house that she had raised us in.  I was fortunate to have been able to buy my two sisters and my brother out and continue to live in the house.  My mom was more of a gardener than I am.  I enjoy the flowers but it is just too difficult to do the work to keep them looking good.  My husband does the grass and weed whacking.  My son is 11 and will help when I ask.  I am looking forward to losing this weight and being able to maintain the flower beds the way they should be maintained.

Hopefully the next time I write I will have my approval.

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