Beth A.

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So many people are quick to think (even if they do not admit it out loud) that they are not proud. This is different than being confident; it is more the cocky attitude that separates us from each other, and more importantly from God. The "I don't need you; I'm fine on my own", or "I didn't do anything wrong, he/she did so why should I be the first to apologize" kind of attitude. One of my favorite quotes is from C.S. Lewis: “A proud man is always looking down on things and people; and, of course, as long as you're looking down, you can't see something that's above you.”

Why do we in the church shoot our own wounded, when in the process the ones we hurt include ourselves?

Why do we go months without speaking to the ones we profess to love and care for?

Why do we walk around with chips on our shoulders, when we only weigh ourselves down?

Why can't we live what we preach (and I am asking this of myself as well as all of you)?

Why do we read notes like this and automatically assume that the author is certainly not speaking of us in particular?

Why did you just think, "Well I know she doesn't mean me!"?

"When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom."

Okay, I'm done for now.

I no longer feel "post-op"-ish. I go back to work tomorrow! YAY! I miss my friends and work buddies. And I soooo need to get back on a normal schedule! So far I have discovered 2 major things: 1) when your doc or dietician tells you NOT to chew gum, the reason is that if you swallow it as so many of us are prone to do it can cause blockage. Found this out the hard way.... and 2) me and grape juice are no longer friends. 

I have figured out that it is not sweets I miss, it's the "real food"...mashed potatoes and roast, grilled chicken (which I'll be able to eat someday but not soon), spaghetti....I have found that the Gerber Graduates line is good and the portions are already small so there is not much waste, and they are mild and do not upset my tummy. I am down about 30 lbs. Still a lot more to go! 

I've had a rough couple days. First of all, I know that my nutritionist said that b/c I am closer to my body weight than a lot of WLS patients, I will lose slower. I have just been so depressed lately. I slept all day Sunday and I cried at the drop of a hat. I can't seem to put into words how I feel.The hiccups are enough to drive a person CRAZY. When I called Dr Gibbs Sunday afternoon I was told that he was not on call. So the other doc calls me back and I tell him about the hiccups and that I am out of meds for that. And believe me they HURT! I also asked him what to do a/b the fact that I had just swallowed my gum. Long story short, he was an ass to me and had the audacity to ask me if it would wait until Monday AM to talk to Dr. Gibbs, b/c Dr. Ass was in surgery. Okay, the very reason for being on call is to deal with issues that CAN'T wait until the work week,  I mean, seriously.
So now I am not only an insomniac but an insomniac with hiccups. Thanks, Dr Ass, you were a real big help.

Only one day left!!! Sooo many people have sent messages here of love and support and prayers. Thanks so much if you are one! 

So my daughter did decide to be baptized the other night, so we surrounded her with love as she made her committment to Christ on Friday night around 10 pm. I have never been so proud. I mean, I am proud of her, always have been, but this is on a level far beyond anything I could have imagined. Her daddy baptized her, which made it even that much more special! I am going to try and post the pic after I am done here, but I may have to shrink it down some because of the size limit. In light of this being the start of our wild weekend, my surgery seems so much less worrisome. I have peace. I know it is going to be life altering, a lot to get used to. But I have so much support from friends and family. 

Hopefully I will feel like blogging by the time I get home, or I may let my sweet husband do it. You guys feel free to call! Love to all! 

Okay, so I broke my trend of song titles as blog titles, but this is a group so it still counts. Sort of. 
I have three days to go and now I'll admit to alittle nervousness. I met with Dr. Gibbs yesterday.....he is so awesome. Down to earth to the core, and his staff is the best as well. I took my questions in and most of them were answered before I even asked. I left the dietician's office so confused. But I have oodles of paperwork to reference, and phone numbers and email addresses for contacting her. I know this is going to be life changing, but right now I cannot comprehend only taking in an ounce at a time. 

Total change of subject, but you other Christians out there will appreciate this one. My 11 year old daughter told me this morning that she wants to accept Christ as her Lord and make her committment public through baptism. I could not be more proud of her. What is most important in life, really, is that we live our lives for Him and raise our children in the grace of God. Even despite all my mistakes as a parent, she has grown up so intelligent, mature, and strikingly beautiful. I deserve none of this. Glory to God!

Pre-op appointments today.....WHOOOO HOOOO! I have my list of questions for Dr. Gibbs and Carrie. A lot of people are asking if I am nervous. Not really, just excited at this point. My husband says he'll ask me when they are taking me in....

Seriously.....I now have 136.5 hours to go. Two working days, 5 1/2 actual days. 

But again, who's counting? 

I am excited. Starting to have trouble sleeping. Also, I am not wanting to eat everything in sight now. Nothing really sounds good. When I first got my date, it was like I craved everything. Now I crave nothing. I am thinking that is a good thing though. 

By the way, not that any of you were wondering, but I am having a really good hair day. Which is surprising, considering the wind is going about 45 MPH outside. I like good hair days.

So......the countdown is on. 

Seven days. 162 hours, 40 minutes from now. But who's counting, right?!

And I just gotta be honest here: I am looking forward to being AWAY FROM WORK! Sometimes, these people just make me nuts. I love my job, I really do, but I hate the way people act like they love everyone but then turn around and talk about them behind their back. And it seems a lot of them talk to me about these people, because I don't gossip, so they know I don't tell anything they say. Sometimes, being trusted isn't all it's cracked up to be. 

My FMLA (Family Medical Leave Act) paperwork has been approved!!!!!!!!!!!!

Everything is going so smooth. I pray that this continues to go well over the next 10 days and following. Thanks to all of my supporters out there.

Okay, so I do realize it is not Christmas. But in keeping with my blog-titles-as-song-titles theme, I chose this song title in honor of the fact that I have 12 days until my surgery!!!!

So to me it does feel a little like Christmas, at least as far as the anticipation factor goes. I even broke it down a little bit further on my Facebook page, so now my status reads "Beth is excited about having only 7 working days until the big day!" or something like that. It's only 7 because I am taking off on the 28th to do all my pre-op appointments. 

AND..... this is pretty sweet as well.....I called my insurance company to check on my copays for the pre-op appointments, and so while I had the lovely Sheena on the phone I asked about plastic surgery following bariatric surgery. It's kind of iffy, basically if the codes used are cosmetic, it will deny.....to me this translates as HOPE! If the doc bills it just right they will pay.....WHOO HOO! 

So I am pretty stoked right now. I'm making a mental list of what to take to the hospital, and what to buy grocery-wise for after. I'll know more after meeting with the dietician. I have a list of questions for Dr. Gibbs. I know my husband has many questions as well, for everyone involved. 

I would like to have my partridge in a pear tree....