3/1/2012 Thursday

Mar 01, 2012

So many emotions...so little time. 

I'm in a mourning/anger phase.  I keep seeing all the different things that I won't be able to eat anymore and I find that I'm pissed!  Mad that I won't be able to eat it anymore...mad that I let myself get so fat that I have to have this as my option...because I'm too far gone fat wise and I have so little self control to lose the weight on my own.  I find that I keep snapping at my husband too...not really fair considering that he's also going through these emotions.

Will they let us bring our broth or waters on the airplane after surgery?  I keep having these random questions...

What if I want my favorites and can't anymore...how will I deal?  How will I provide them for my kids without going nuts?  You know...like homeade banana bread...?

What if I lose all the weight and look horribly old because there's no fat to fill in the lines?

What if I regret it for the rest of my life?

Am I crazy?  What the *#*^*** do  I think I'm DOING???  You know...random questions like that.

Sigh...20 days left until surgery.

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