Courtie_D76
It's Been A Century Already!!
Sep 20, 2007
Well on the 29th of Sept. I will be six months out and as of yesterday I am exactly 100 pounds lighter than I was on March 29th!! Can you believe it???
I've went down about 10 pants sizes. Does that sound right? I was wearing 36 to 40 in Women's now I can wear an 18 in stretchy-jeans or 22 in regular. Whatever it doesn't really matter, well yes it does. That means I don't have to shop out of the Lane Bryant catalog anymore and I can go buy clothes in a regular department store. I've not done that since I was a kid!
Another thing that makes me happy is that I'm finally small enough to share pants with my sister. We can really wear the same shirts though because, well, basically she is short and has no torso. I have about 6 inches on her so a long shirt on her is a belly shirt on me. lmao
I've been exercising at night, where no one can see me out on our big trampoline, been taking my meds, been eating lot's of protien, drinking lot's of water, having lot's of fun, getting dirty, riding bikes, swinging at the park, rolling around on the floor with my sister's kids, getting some male attention...yum, I've been working hard, staying happy, trying new things, meeting new people and just generally living a life I never thought I'd have.
I don't regret any part of this journey, nothing! Even when I was in pain and had to have my g-tube removed early, that I got over and now all is well. I'm mended and now I have only about 76 more pounds to go. I know this first bit came off easy, maybe a little too easy and I got spoiled, but I know that I will have to work harder to lose the rest and I am determined to do it and do it right.
I have no intentions of getting skinny. I don't want skinny nor desire to be skinny. Thinner, yes. Happier, you bet. Healthier, absolutely. I've started on this crazy ride and there's no getting off until...well, my fat lady sings. :)
I've went down about 10 pants sizes. Does that sound right? I was wearing 36 to 40 in Women's now I can wear an 18 in stretchy-jeans or 22 in regular. Whatever it doesn't really matter, well yes it does. That means I don't have to shop out of the Lane Bryant catalog anymore and I can go buy clothes in a regular department store. I've not done that since I was a kid!
Another thing that makes me happy is that I'm finally small enough to share pants with my sister. We can really wear the same shirts though because, well, basically she is short and has no torso. I have about 6 inches on her so a long shirt on her is a belly shirt on me. lmao
I've been exercising at night, where no one can see me out on our big trampoline, been taking my meds, been eating lot's of protien, drinking lot's of water, having lot's of fun, getting dirty, riding bikes, swinging at the park, rolling around on the floor with my sister's kids, getting some male attention...yum, I've been working hard, staying happy, trying new things, meeting new people and just generally living a life I never thought I'd have.
I don't regret any part of this journey, nothing! Even when I was in pain and had to have my g-tube removed early, that I got over and now all is well. I'm mended and now I have only about 76 more pounds to go. I know this first bit came off easy, maybe a little too easy and I got spoiled, but I know that I will have to work harder to lose the rest and I am determined to do it and do it right.
I have no intentions of getting skinny. I don't want skinny nor desire to be skinny. Thinner, yes. Happier, you bet. Healthier, absolutely. I've started on this crazy ride and there's no getting off until...well, my fat lady sings. :)
Two Months Out Already?!?
May 31, 2007
Well it's been two months since my surgery and since my last post. I kept meaning to come on here and update, but I kept forgetting. There has been so much going on around here.
I guess I need to fill in on the surgery or what not...
The day of my surgery I had my closest friends and family there with me. My Mom, Dad, sister-Brandy, and friends Steph and Kelly. I was relaxed and confident with having them all there. My Momma was more worried than I was though. I told her that, "I don't believe God is going to take me now. Not after surviving two suicide attempts and a few health scrapes."
I'm not sure that helped her feel better about it, but it did me. I just kept telling myself that. And I still believe it. I think He has a purpose for me, I'm anxious to know what it is, but I guess I have no other choice than to wait. lol
So I was calm up until they called me back to get prepped. I had to change into a lovely gown and some gorgeous white toeless stockings. lol I was O.K. until they started allowing my family and friends to come back to see me. Then I started getting nervous. They were all crying, so I started crying...it was a mess. :)
It was so funny though, the nurse asked me if I was pregnant or if there was a chance..."Not unless it's another immaculate conception", I told her. I mean I haven't had sex in something like 8 years now. Funny and yet so, so very sad. lol She made me take a pee test anyway. Go figure.
So the only thing I remember is that they wheeled me back to the OR and had me scoot over to the operating table, then the anest...whatever, the person that knocks you out said, "I'll give you something just to help you relax, something like drinking two Budlights." Yeah, the next thing I knew I was waking up, pissed at the world because I had the worst dry mouth ever!
So I was in the hospital in a semi-private room. Unfortunately I was on the side with the door and unless the other bed was empty or my neighbors were very kind, I didn't get to see much of the outside through the window. That sucked and I got depressed. Well on top of being shut off from the window there were a lot of other things that got to me:
The hospital was about 30 minutes from my home, so visitors were sometime few and far between.
My G-tube site was very painful and had gotten infected.
I got a fever.
I guess I need to fill in on the surgery or what not...
The day of my surgery I had my closest friends and family there with me. My Mom, Dad, sister-Brandy, and friends Steph and Kelly. I was relaxed and confident with having them all there. My Momma was more worried than I was though. I told her that, "I don't believe God is going to take me now. Not after surviving two suicide attempts and a few health scrapes."
I'm not sure that helped her feel better about it, but it did me. I just kept telling myself that. And I still believe it. I think He has a purpose for me, I'm anxious to know what it is, but I guess I have no other choice than to wait. lol
So I was calm up until they called me back to get prepped. I had to change into a lovely gown and some gorgeous white toeless stockings. lol I was O.K. until they started allowing my family and friends to come back to see me. Then I started getting nervous. They were all crying, so I started crying...it was a mess. :)
It was so funny though, the nurse asked me if I was pregnant or if there was a chance..."Not unless it's another immaculate conception", I told her. I mean I haven't had sex in something like 8 years now. Funny and yet so, so very sad. lol She made me take a pee test anyway. Go figure.
So the only thing I remember is that they wheeled me back to the OR and had me scoot over to the operating table, then the anest...whatever, the person that knocks you out said, "I'll give you something just to help you relax, something like drinking two Budlights." Yeah, the next thing I knew I was waking up, pissed at the world because I had the worst dry mouth ever!
So I was in the hospital in a semi-private room. Unfortunately I was on the side with the door and unless the other bed was empty or my neighbors were very kind, I didn't get to see much of the outside through the window. That sucked and I got depressed. Well on top of being shut off from the window there were a lot of other things that got to me:
The hospital was about 30 minutes from my home, so visitors were sometime few and far between.
My G-tube site was very painful and had gotten infected.
I got a fever.
FOUR DAYS!!! AAAHHHHH!!!
Mar 26, 2007
Well it seems I haven't posted in a while. Well since my last and rather depressing post, I have since found out that I only needed $500 up front and not the $1500 that I originally was told. I went in last week and met my doc, had a physical, had all the neccesary blood tests, x-rays, catscans, ultrasounds, etc. I also had two classes; bariatric and respitory. The only thing I haven't done is go to a support meeting and I probably won't get one in before I go in on Thursday, but I will go right after the surgery. I feel like I haven't got time for anything.
I have four days until the Roux-n-Y. I don't regret this decision...so far. However I do regret all of the worry and anxiety I am putting my family through. They don't deserve it, nor do any of us need more stress. But what am I to do? I want this more than anything I've ever wanted, besides children and I don't think that will happen unless I lose weight. I've tried so many things throughout my life as I am sure many of my fellow WLS patients have and I just can't stick to it. I feel that with this surgery I will be forced to lose the weight. Everyone knows what happens when you mess up on this "diet" and I learn from experience. I expect there to be pain and hanging skin afterwards. I expect many, many hard and difficult changes, but I also look forward to all of it because then I know I will have come through a great journey in life and be rewarded in the end.
I have four days until the Roux-n-Y. I don't regret this decision...so far. However I do regret all of the worry and anxiety I am putting my family through. They don't deserve it, nor do any of us need more stress. But what am I to do? I want this more than anything I've ever wanted, besides children and I don't think that will happen unless I lose weight. I've tried so many things throughout my life as I am sure many of my fellow WLS patients have and I just can't stick to it. I feel that with this surgery I will be forced to lose the weight. Everyone knows what happens when you mess up on this "diet" and I learn from experience. I expect there to be pain and hanging skin afterwards. I expect many, many hard and difficult changes, but I also look forward to all of it because then I know I will have come through a great journey in life and be rewarded in the end.
Disappointed
Jan 28, 2007
A couple of days after I got the exciting news about my surgery date, recieved a letter telling me that I had to pay $500 dollars up front and then I called and the lady said in addition to $900 and something...I was devistated. I totally either missed that part of the lecture or I blocked it out. Either way, I cried until I thought my eyes would come out trying to figure out how exactly am I supposed to come up with $1500 by the middle of March?!? Now all that excitement has become ash and pieces of a broken heart. My sister told me yesterday that she is going to mail letters to all of my family and friends and ask them for the money. God Bless her! I love my little sis so much. She knows how important this is to me and she knows that I've wanted it for so long.
It's already the end of January. Yesterday was my Dad's 53rd birthday. I took him, Mom and sis Brandy out to dinner. Of course Dad wants to go to Golden Corral. LOL As I sat there looking at the plate I just piled with high fat, high calorie, high carbed foods, I thought, "Wow. I will not be able to eat this stuff again after March." And I surprised that I wasn't too sad about it. I was actually proud of myself though, I ate a big salad first so I never did finish any of that other stuff I got. My Dad is a little sad about it all though, that's "our" place to go.
I want this more than anything else I've wanted in my life. I feel like this will change my life in everyway. I still want to finish school with Associates Degrees in Culinary and Fine Arts. But being as big as a house, you can't move around in a kitchen like you should. There is a lotof people and things running around in a busy kitchen and you are a complication and not an asset if you are blocking the rows. Not to mention the stamina needed to be a sculpture and a chef both. I don't know why I couldn't ever be interested in a sit down job, no, instead my goals involve movement, stress, and unending needs for energy. LOL
I hope to get married and have kids before I'm too old. I want to not be on disability or live with my parents. I'm 30 years old for Gosh Sakes! I should be out there with my own life, but I've never seemed to been able to get the gumption or the self esteem needed for such things. I don't know any more. maybe it'll all work out and all this whining will be void.
It's already the end of January. Yesterday was my Dad's 53rd birthday. I took him, Mom and sis Brandy out to dinner. Of course Dad wants to go to Golden Corral. LOL As I sat there looking at the plate I just piled with high fat, high calorie, high carbed foods, I thought, "Wow. I will not be able to eat this stuff again after March." And I surprised that I wasn't too sad about it. I was actually proud of myself though, I ate a big salad first so I never did finish any of that other stuff I got. My Dad is a little sad about it all though, that's "our" place to go.
I want this more than anything else I've wanted in my life. I feel like this will change my life in everyway. I still want to finish school with Associates Degrees in Culinary and Fine Arts. But being as big as a house, you can't move around in a kitchen like you should. There is a lotof people and things running around in a busy kitchen and you are a complication and not an asset if you are blocking the rows. Not to mention the stamina needed to be a sculpture and a chef both. I don't know why I couldn't ever be interested in a sit down job, no, instead my goals involve movement, stress, and unending needs for energy. LOL
I hope to get married and have kids before I'm too old. I want to not be on disability or live with my parents. I'm 30 years old for Gosh Sakes! I should be out there with my own life, but I've never seemed to been able to get the gumption or the self esteem needed for such things. I don't know any more. maybe it'll all work out and all this whining will be void.
First Entry...
Jan 16, 2007
It's been two days since I recieved the call from Jennifer, the insurance coordinator at Miami Valley Hospital. I can't believe everything is happening so fast. When she called me, all I could do was laugh and cry and the same time from happiness and fear. I think I scared my poor neice, Shayna to death. She's only 8, but so smart and such a character. I will talk about her and her littler sister, Jadah and her little brother, Bubby Jo a lot. LOL They keep me alive these days. Now I have something else to live for. The emotional rollercoaster I seem to be on though is crazy, but I guess it's to be expected. Time for bed.
