Darkeesha S.

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Hello Everybody!  It has been a really long time since I have updated my status.  I am doing very well, living and enjoying life.  The weight loss, well that's another story.  It has been 13 months now and I am actually 7 pounds heavier than my lowest weight.  I had the surgery in Feb 09 and started working out in July.  The smallest I got on the scale was 218 lbs.  I started lifting weights and gained a few pounds, but my clothes fit and look amazing.  The other part to that is that I have REALLY strayed away from my Lap Band eating rules.  My band still lets me know its there, but I do eat more than I should.  My husband and I started P90X 1 March and that program requires you to eat a lot of food.  I don't eat nearly as much as they said I should, but I try really hard to at least get my proteins in.  So to put things in perspective, I started this journey at a miserable (for me) 262 lbs, size 20/22.  Today, 13 mos later, I am 224 and a comfortable size 16.  I haven't lost any weight in 5 mos, but then again as I stated earlier, I haven't exactly been living by the rules either.  Nevertheless I am truly happy with my progress.  Is there room for improvement...of course!  Would I like to lose more weight...Definitely!  Am I going to dwell on the fact that I should be farther along in my weight loss....Absolutely Not because what happened yesterday is the past, I learn from it and move on.  All I can do at this point is renew my committment to my band and I know that it will not let me down.   My ultimate goal is 175 pounds, but once I get under 200, I am getting contacts (prescription)!  LOL!

OMG!!!  I am soooo excited.  I bought a outfit this weekend from the non plus size section (shirt & pants)!!!!  I just wanted to try on a smaller size to gauge how much farther I had to go to get in them.  So I grabbed the biggest size pants in the regular section (XL).  When I got to the dressing room and pulled them up, they were practically falling off me.  I COULD NOT BELIEVE IT!!!!  So I went back and grabbed the Large.  They fit perfectly!!!  I was soooo estatic!!!!  Then I got two extra large shirts....they both fit!!!!  I could not remember when I last wore an extra large shirt!  OMG, that was such an exhilirating shopping experience!!!  7 mos, 43 lbs down, 44 more to go!

Potatoes (in any form) and Cheez Its are a NO GO at this station!  I have come to accept that now that I cannot tolerate either of them.  I have tried over and over (in small quantities) and the pain associated with them are just not worth it.  Probably a good thing too, because I shouldn't be eating either of them anyway!!!

No more gulping!  And just as another bandster posted...ladylike sips only!  Still learning......

OMG!!  This fill is noooooo joke.  This morning I had a strawberry essence protein drink on my way to work.  Then at about 2.5 hours later, I heated a jimmy dean breakfast sandwich in the microwave.  I threw away the english muffin part and just ate the canadian bacon, egg whites, and cheese.  Man!  after that first bite I thought I was going to die (well not literally, but I was sooo surprised at the reaction)...immediate stuck.  Didn't help that I didn't chew well either.  Finally I ended up in the bathroom throwing up after ONE bite!  I am sooooo mad at myself for not having this "take small bites and chew well" thing down yet.  So I have learned that the band is not so forgiving if you take to big of a first bite.  However, if I keep going thru this, I will learn that lesson very quickly!

Reminder...THINK "SMALL BITES AND CHEW WELL" BEFORE THE FIRST BITE!!!!!!!

There is a BIGGGGGGGGG difference in this one and my first one.  I ate a grape the other day, you know just mindlessly popped it into my mouth, and a few seconds later, I realized what I had done.  That grape (well the skin at least) was stuck right in the middle of my chest.  I literally had to stop what I was doing and wait for it to subside...about 2 or 3 minutes.  Then we went to a chinese buffet  yesterday after church.  Once again, I mindlessly bit a slice of fried potato (soft) that I had put on my daughter's plate before going to the buffet to get my plate.   By the time I got back to the table with my plate, I had to sit down and couldn't TOUCH my food for about 5 minutes while I slimed like crazy and that doggone clump in my chest subsided.  And if that ever happens to you...DON'T DRINK WATER!!!  It just makes it worse.  You're gonna feel like you want to, but don't.  It was just hard to sit there and try not to let on to my family what was really going on, but they can tell anyway.  Here I am sitting with this big plate of food in front of me and not touching it.  Something must be wrong!  And that is the other thing.  I got a plate full of what I usually eat.  But I learned yesterday that if I go to another buffet only get small amounts, because most of the food will get cold before I get to it.  So needlessly to say, I didn't even eat half of what I usually eat, but I still don't think going there was a waste because I got to sample a little of everything.  I am finding that eating is not the pleasure that it used to be; but I guess that is just because I still not proficient at eating using the band rules just yet.  I think it will get better though.  I actually look forward to the day when I can really enjoy my meal by taking small bites and feel satisfied because my mind, eyes, and stomach are all in sync.

So here is my bottom line take on this fill....I can definitely FEEL the difference.  I notice a change in the amount of food I can eat, but more so in the type of food (potatoes, crackers, and fruit peels) go down pretty hard.  I also noticed a change in how long I stay full, but I still battle with head hunger, you know, not really being hungry, but wanting to eat something anyway.  i really hope that gets better.  

Yesterday, I had my second fill.  First I was surprised to see that I weighed in at 234 which is 14 lbs less than my last weigh in 6 weeks ago.  Second, I thought under fluoro was going to be a little more interesting.  I don't know whether my doc was in a hurry or not, but I saw the fluid emptying and what my stomach looks like, but not much else.  Also, I asked about that pain in my shoulder and he said it is referred pain from the diaphram, caused by the esophagus stretching when I eat (I did have a hernia repaired during surgery). 

I got 2ccs which brings me to 5cc in a 10cc band.  My instructions after this fill was to do liquids for the next 3 days and weigh myself daily.  If at any point, I gain a pound, my doc wants me to go back on liquids until I am 1 lb below my lowest weight.  Talk about agressive in losing weight.  I actually like the plan because I KNOW I don't want to go back on liquids, so I will keep that in mind as I prepare and eat my meals in the coming days.  As far as whether I can tell a diff or not....I really can this time.  After my last fill, I was STARVING...but this time after I drank that barium stuff, I was not even hungry (even after not eating since 730 the night before) and even this morning it has taken me from 0730 until now to drink 8 oz of protein drink and I am still not done.  I can hardly wait to see the effects how much food I can eat and what kinds.  I will find out the real deal on Sunday.

I can fit my size 16s now!!!!  Yayeee!!!  But I still need to do better with exercise!!! 

I have found out that I am not as strong as I thought.  As the grocery shopper in the house, I don't buy the junk food that I like so that I won't be tempted, but I still buy snacks for the kids and my husband.  Lately I have found myself snacking on the kids snacks (like Cheerios snack mix) that I wouldn't even buy myself.  Anyhow, long story short....I AM NOT BUYING ANY MORE UNHEALTHY SNACKS OR COOKIES.  If it is not good for me, chances are it won't hurt if those in my household didn't consume those items either! 

OMG!! I am soooo excited.  This Wednesday I will be 6 Weeks out.  I am down 25.5 lbs!  Yayeee!  My clothes fit better and I am getting compliments from all over the place.  Just this morning, my boss asked me how much weight I lost already.  I told him and he said "GD" (you know that is) and just shook his head!!  LOL!!!  I feel sooooo much better about myself already.  My husband keeps telling me how "skinny" I look, but I am still like "yeah right".  If this 25.5 lbs have made such a difference (I now weigh 236.5 from 262), just wait until I get below 200!!!