Dawnm
Confession is good for the soul
Jun 19, 2010
A small bump in the road. Well that's what I'm calling it anyway. It's funny how sometimes without realizing it you can go back to old habits. Mine started on June 5, 2010. My baby was graduating from high school and I had been busy all week pulling together her graduation and party. I was cooking non stop for 3 days but I was fine. On the day of her party I was also fine - had breakfast as usual and then around 8:00 p.m. the night of her party it hit me after everyone had left. I hadn't eaten since breakfast and I was starving.... and this is where the old habits kicked back in! I was eating everything I could get my hands on. It was a different kind of binge because I was eating smaller portions of food - but I still went for food that I haven't eaten in months (6 to be exact) potato salad and kielbasa cooked in a very sweet sauce(brown sugar, ketchup and whiskey) , and then a very small piece of graduation cake. This started my downfall, I still got on the scale every morning but for about 2 weeks I kept seeing the numbers climb - 3 pounds, 5 pounds, 7 pounds but I didn't stop. It was like eating the "old foods" again had triggered a hunger I couldn't stop. For this two week period I was obsessed with food again. And then on June 17th, 7.4 pounds higher than I had been on June 5th - I stopped it. I called a really good friend and confessed my binge (well for the night before anyway) and asked for a pep talk to get me back on track. He reminded me how hard I had worked and how far I had come - 78 pounds in 6 months is no small feat. He told me to keep my chin up - by now I was crying because I was so mad at myself! He told me I was worth it and reminded me of all the family health traits I was trying so hard to avoid - high blood pressure, diabeties, depression. And that day I jump back on the band wagon instead of watching it circle me over and over. I got back on this board and confessed..... again. I got great advice from the wonderful friends here. I joined a weight loss challenge ( Labor Day Challenge - pledged to lose 35 pounds in 11 weeks) and even started my own exercise challenge! For a short time I forgot my mantra - I am strong, I am determined, I will not quit! But I have it all back now and I'm not going to lose it again. I am pround to say that I have lost 9.5 pounds in the last three days - amazing! I know I will make my short term goal of 100 pounds by the time I go back to the surgeon on July 21. I can and will do this........ with a little help from my friends.
