One Week Later

May 14, 2010

It has been a week since I got my approval letter, and my head is still spinning.  I am due to meet with the surgeon soon and then take the 3 1/2 hour long class.  In the meantime, I have been talking with my husband and quizzing him on so many things.  The OH board is amazing. I read some of the post questions (which are some of the same questions I have) and he gives me his experience.  He had RNY two years ago and he looks wonderful!!
I have started going through my closet because the winter season has gone and want to get rid of some of the clothes.  My husband says, wait until you actually start to lose the weight and it will mean so much more to you when you clean out the closet. I guess that makes sense, but I guess I am just ready to move on to a much smaller and healthier me.
I have not shared the fact that I am having wls with my co workers. I am not trying to keep it secret, its just that I don't feel like I fit in with them anyway. I know very little about their lives outside of the job.  They are all conversing and having a good time while I handle the front desk(which is my job)  Sometimes it bothers to me to no end when one of them says, "I got to lose some weight because the 6's I was wearing last summer are too tight." Jealous, no, I'm not. It just seems like those are the comments I often hear above anything else. Someone else says, "you can tell I'm not committed to an exercise routine." The one thing that really gets me, they bring in desserts and don't offer me any. Not 100 percent of the time, but 85 percent. What's up with that?I have never taken more than a serving.   Nevertheless, I am the one who has to live for me. If they ask me once I start to lose the weight, I'll tell them. I just don't plan to discuss it with them. 
I have had to learn the hard lesson of friends. I have been a good friend to lots of people, but they were not friends with me. I have also accepted the fact that some people will be there for you for a reason and others will be there for you for a season. I just have to continue to be a friend no matter what.  I don't determine who enters into my life, I have to determine who I allow to remain in my life.

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