Faith is the Key Dec 13,2010

Dec 12, 2010

My OH Family!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What can I really say?! for yet it would still be an excuse to why I haven't had a chance to get on the site to update, I was going back over my previous updates, of my weightloss journey,,, Now I can truley say the journey still continues,,,,,,,, bitter and sweet. Even in my time of discouragement in reference to my weight gain,,,, Yes your read correcetly, WEIGHT GAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am still trying to hold on to the faith of knowing there is yet a way to start up the weightloss yet again...Well here where I left off since the last update Januay of  2010, After having the revision in Nov 2009, I had started back losing, and once again I had gotten back down to 250 lbs, stayed @ that weght for about 6 months, then around July 2010, I started to graudally gain again..!!!!! And @ that point I was really wanting to throw my hands up, for I felt that all the fight of going bk & forth, testing and surgeries just to now start back gaining OMG (as the teens would say!) So each & every day since I cotinue to try to watch what I eat, although exercise is not a love of mine I try to walk as much as I can, which helps me to at  least  stay @ the same weight which is now 285-290 lbs which was what I last weighed in and that was on 11/29/10 @ my last PCP Dr. Appt. Yes I wanted to scream when I saw that # on that digital scale..OHHHHHHHHH HELLLLLLLLLLLL Here I go again, thats all I remember saying over in my mind. Now mind you my weightloss was not the purpose for my doctor's visit. I had been going for Blood Pressure oh yeah , just one other thing that has incresed since my weight lossnow weight gain, High blood pressure has seemd to hv creeped up. Its something that runs in the family and before my weight loss I was on the boarder line yet once my 1st surgery and the beginning weight loss my BP had lowered and stablized just one of the many benefits of the weightloss!! Let me pause to share this......." Even though right now I am going thru a momentary plateau. I  am sooooooooo Thankful for being given the gift of expressing a life of being smaller and the weight I have lost from the gastric bypass, I have experienced so many wonderful things that some thinner indivduals take for granted, walking w/o being out of breath, going up & dwn stairs w/o knees and back hurting. going to the amusement park and riding any and every ride w/o being afraid the attendant would say the bars will not lock so you are unable to ride on the ride. being able to sit n booths and any resturant, traveling on airplanes and not having to worry if you will be ask to buy 2 seats or just asking for belt extension.. and the list goes on and on. Even my social experience of being single and dating more that I ever have in my life. Having the confidence to do anything I want.!!!!! Yes the joyous feeling of those things are PRICELESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!And for those  things mentiond is the very reason why I am fighting tooth and nail to continue and conqueror my weight loss..NOW back to what I was saying, I am hopeful but I am only human and I am thankful for the WLS support group, which I believe is a big help in keeping me hopeful and determined to move on and find a solution. Yet right now I am @ my wits end. I am not sure what to do next. I know I need to make an appointment with the bariatric doctor to see what needs to be done yet I am having a very hard time trusting any doc @ the moment. Of course its their job, but I am not made of money and by far not rich, And thankful for health insurance, yet I know my OH family undestands to well how expensive the journey of WLS can be, the deductiable is incresing so although helpful still expensive as heck!!!  I had never had any surgeries in my life until my 2007 gastric bypass since then I hv had 3 surgeries, So yes expensive and I still want a body lift also, the excessive skin thing is working my nerves too.Yet another thing that keeps me grounded is I didn't gain all my weight over night, there for I know losing and reaching goal is also a process..............Right now, yet hopefull still discourage any help is appreciated...........Right now I am going to continue to be thankful and enjoy the Christmas holidays.......So HAPPY HOLIDAYYYYYYYYSSSSSSSSSSSS OH FAMILY!!!!!!!!!!!!  

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