jamie2377
Where to begin...(April 9, 2010)
May 28, 2010
Well, I guess the best place to begin would be to tell you the reason I am beginning this blog. On June 1st at 7 a.m. I am going to walk into Centennial Medical Center in Nashville, TN, to prepare for a life-changing surgery. I am going to have gastric bypass. Since meeting with the surgeon 2 weeks ago, I've experienced so many emotions. It's been really hard to sort them out. So, my family suggested I start a blog and chronicle my entire journey. I don't know if anyone will read this, and I'm not expecting anyone to. I guess it's just more of an encouraging thing for myself. It's a way I can express my feelings and sort through them. If anyone does happen to read this, I hope you find it interesting and encouraging.So, let's start from the beginning. I'm 20 years old, and I have been overweight for the majority of my life. Even in Kindergarten, I could tell I was a little bigger than everyone else. I know that's kind of early in life to notice something like that, but in the society we live in today, it doesn't matter what age you are. People are going to point out your flaws to the rest of the world. When I was in 3rd grade, I joined my school's 3rd and 4th grade basketball team. It was something I enjoyed doing, and apparently people thought I was pretty good. I played for a couple years, and then at the age of 9 I started "that girl thing", as my mom called it. Yeah, I know. A 9-year-old starting her period. Pretty wild. But after that, things just started to go down hill. I quit the basketball team because I just didn't want to do anything anymore. I felt tired and sluggish all the time, and that's when the weight started to pile on. I was very fortunate to have great friends throughout elementary school and high school that loved me for me and not what I looked like, so being overweight never really bothered me much. But right before I started high school, I suffered from a deep depression. It was mostly because I felt like I had no one to care about me, and I knew it was directly associated with my weight. Throughout my teen years, my periods were very heavy and uncomfortable. This also made me withdraw from activities I once loved. Because of this, my doctor put me on birth-control pills. These helped a little, but the weight still kept piling on.
In order to stay on the birth-control pills, I had to schedule regular blood work every few months or so to make sure all my blood levels were good. One day my mother, grandmother, and I went to get the results of my blood work at the hospital. Everything was normal. All of my levels were in a good range. While standing in the hallway looking at the results, they told me about talking with one of my mom's friends who worked at the hospital. They talked about how great she looked and how much weight she had lost since the last time they had seen her. This led to all of us talking at one of the support group meetings. It was very informative, and we were all really excited about it. We started looking into the surgery, and here we are. In 7 weeks, I'll be having gastric bypass surgery and my life will officially begin again.
I must say, I get so excited when I think about the aftermath of the surgery. Shopping for pretty clothes, hanging out with my friends more, dancing at church without losing my breath, and finally being confident in myself. I'll look good, but most of all I'll feel good too. I don't want to be skinny or stick thin. I just want to be healthy. I know this is going to be a great thing. Whatever fears I have about this, I know God is more than enough. He hasn't given me a spirit of fear, but a spirit of power, love, and a sound mind. I can do all things through Him, and I know He is in this. I'm excited about what the future holds, and I hope you will go on this journey with me.
