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I had my surgery on April 29th.  I never really felt nervous about doing it, although subconsciously I must have been because that week before the surgery I had the worst time sleeping at night.  The morning of surgery when I went to the hospital, I think my mom was more nervous than me.  I didn't have any second thoughts or fears as I walked into the operating room. (Yes I walked into the operating room and got up on the table, they strapped my arms down, put a mask on me, and that's the last I remember) The surgery went well and I ended up going home from the hospital the next day.  I haven't had any complications, and while the pain was pretty bad in the beginning, it was manageable.  I stopped taking the narcotic pain medication about 6 days after surgery.  It still hurts a little bit to sneeze or cough though!  Those were the two worst things for me I think, sneezing and coughing.  And getting out of bed at first.
I write down everything I eat in a little journal, and I log it on fitday.com so I can keep track of the protein and calories.  So far I have lost 23 pounds since surgery.  My weight at my consultation last September was 284.  My weight the day of surgery was 266.6.  Today my weight is 243.4!  It is so amazing to me, I can already wear smaller sizes, I look forward to seeing what clothes I haven't worn in years I will be able to put on next!  My personal goal is to be able to wear a bikini next summer.  I have a long way to go, but I think I can do it!  I'm also really happy that Dr. Inman did such a great job on the incisions, the scars are tiny and flat, so I know once they are healed they are not going to show that much.  I've been rubbing bio-oil on them every day too so that might be helping too. 
I've been doing my walking every day with my dog - Foxy is so happy about that! I also do wii fit plus, not every day, but usually every 2 or 3 days.  I am chomping at the bit to start "an exercise program" but I am waiting until I have my first follow up appointment with Dr. Inman and it's not until June 7.  I was pretty surprised that it was not sooner than that.  I really want to start building muscle.  I told people who knew I was having surgery that I was less nervous about the surgery than I was about loose skin!  Its true, I'm young, I'm single, and appearance is important...I am going to do all I can to avoid the skin issue as much as possible.  I will say that so far, the only skin that looks a little questionable so far is my upper arms...of course!
I took 2 weeks off work and just came back last week.  It was really hard that first week.  I probably could have used another week off, but I didn't have the time to take.  I was so tired, and after a while I would start hurting or getting dizzy, so I would end up leaving early - usually between 1 and 3 - the entire week.  I feel much better this week and have been able to stay the entire day all week so far.  Still struggling to get up in the morning, but once I am up, I have plenty of energy to do stuff.
Everything hasn't been perfect though.  I've had some times when I felt frustrated or scared it wasn't going to work.  The first time I went to the grocery store after surgery by myself I got a little bummed walking around seeing all this food I used to love to eat.  I had those passing thoughts, "I wish I could eat that right now!" but they passed.  Actually it was a lot like when I quit smoking last year - I had those thoughts every once in a while "A cigarette sounds good right about now", but they pass, and I think the food thoughts are very similar.  I guess they are right that it is an addiction.  
The first week after surgery - that Thursday to the next Friday - I lost 16 pounds.  Then from May 8th to about the 20th, I lost NOTHING.  Not one pound!  I couldn't help myself from weighing every day, and it was really driving me crazy.  I started having all these thoughts about how it's not going to work for me, I'm only going to lose 16 pounds, I'm going to stay fat forever, did I make a huge mistake, etc., etc...  Don't get discouraged if you go through a stall like that!  It started coming off again for me, and I've lost 7 more pounds since then. 
I hope sharing my experiences of my first month have helped answer some questions or alleviate some fears for any one considering this surgery, or nervous about their upcoming surgery date.  If you have any questions, I'll be happy to answer them! 

I still don't think it has completely sunk in that I will be having this surgery in 9 days.  It still doesn't seem real.  Consciously, I don't feel nervous, but I think my subconscious is because I have had the worst insomnia for the past week and it doesn't seem to be getting any better.  At this point I just want to get it done and over with so my mind will relax and I can start moving forward.  I've been taken out for so many "last meals" with friends the past month, I've gained 5 pounds!  Honestly, I am tired of eating, I feel gross for having ate so much the past couple weeks.  Saturday will be the last hurrah, my closest friends are taking me out for sushi and then we are going out to celebrate and say goodbye to the old me. 

I'm glad that most of my friends are happy and excited for me and have been so supportive. I only have one friend that I told who opposed my decision.  It makes me very sad that she has stopped talking to me, we live in different states, and I don't get to see her often.  She is my best friend.  I hope that she will come around and accept my decision.  The only other people I've told were my friends who live in the same city as me, because one of them is getting married in October so I felt like I had to tell her because I am going to be a bridesmaid!  My parents know, and my boss.  My brothers, aunts, uncles, cousins, grandma, and all of my other friends who live in other cities have no idea I am going to do this.  I'm not going to hide it from them.  If I am asked I will tell them.  I just don't want to hear it right now.  I know I am doing the best thing for me. 

Most of my friends have never had a weight problem, they can't understand.  They also have never struggled with major treatment resistant depression like I have.  My depression is the reason I gained most of the weight.  I've been in an unrelenting depression for 7 years.  I feel like I am coming out of it, I have been working on it for almost a year.  I want the surgery to finish the process so that I can move on with my life.  When I am depressed, I eat, I gain weight, I get depressed about my weight, I eat....its a vicious cycle.  Having this surgery is going to break that pattern for me.  I am going to have confidence in myself again and look better.  When I found out I was approved for surgery, for the first time I had hope.  It feels good to look forward to the future for the first time in years.

I have been working with a psychiatrist and a therapist for a year on my problems. When I told them I wanted to do this, they were supportive of my decision.  They agree that doing this will help me mentally and physically.   While I may not have diabetes or sleep apnea, my weight has affected my life tremendously.  If I don't lose the weight, my depression would only get worse as I see life passing me by.  While all my friends have being following their paths in life, going back to school, getting masters degrees, moving to new cities, getting better jobs, getting married, having children...I've been stuck in my fat and my depression.  I am so anxious to start my life again!

I know that the surgery isn't going to magically solve all my problems, but it is going to give me a tool to help me manage my weight and live a healthier lifestyle, which will in turn improve my mood and appearance, which will then help all the other pieces in my life to fall into place and make me a more complete person with a more fulfilling life. 

I can't remember if it was the end of November 09 or the beginning of December 09, but around that time I found out that my surgery had been denied by the insurance company.  I was so angry!  In the denial letter I did notice the code that the surgeon used.  It was a generic laprascopic bariatric surgery code, I can't remember which one at the moment.  I knew that in 2010 the sleeve was getting an official CPT code, so I emailed the surgeon's office back and told them about the new code and sent them the link to the official 2010 CPT code list on the medicaid website.  At the end of January the surgeon's office emailed me and let me know they were resubmitting with the new code.  At that point I was so discouraged after fighting with the insurance company (I was also arguing with them because they wouldn't pay for the consultation with the bariatric surgeon because it was "non surgical treatment for obesity") I pretty much just thought WHATEVER.  I didn't even respond to the email.  I just didn't think anything would change.  I just put the thought of surgery out of my mind.  

Then, this past Saturday on 2/27/2010 I got a letter from my insurance company saying I was approved.  I was stunned because I had forgotten all about the surgeon resubmitting my claim.  I am happy that I am being given the opportunity to do this and finally move on with my life.   Now I am just waiting to hear back from the surgeon's office so I know what I need to do next. 

Monday afternoon I have my first consult.  I am excited to get started, but I am apprehensive.  I don't want to get my hopes up, because everything I look forward to usually ends up being a huge disappointment.  I am trying to stay positive and believe that this is going to happen for me, but it is hard to do that when it seems like every time I get close to the door -relatively speaking- in life, it gets slammed in my face.