Katie M.
Am I learning patience?
Sep 06, 2013
Probably not. But I am learning not to obsess over things I need to just shut up and wait for. My last two appointments went well, they both said I seemed well prepared for the lifestyle changes that come with surgery. So now I just wait until they call with a date to meet the surgeon. I don't think I'll need to go back and redo any appointments, but they could call and say I need to do that. My best friend Rayann was insistent that I call today to see if they'd gotten to my file yesterday, but when I called she wasn't in. I got the other lady - the one who I'm sure is lovely but just doesn't ever seem to be in the mood to fill you in on where your file is at. She said to call Rayann back on Monday afternoon when she's in again. And that is not what I wanted to hear. I've been on pins and needles since Monday morning when my last appointment ended, waiting until today when I could call. Now I have to wait until Monday? Gah!! So after obsessing over it for a few hours I finally snapped back to reality and decided that maybe waiting a few extra days is not the end of the world. And that was that, I've stopped thinking about it. Five months ago (or less!) I'd spend all weekend with half my mind whirling over the possibilities - did they not get to my file? Will I have to wait until next Friday to find out? Will I have to see anyone over again? Did the psych manage to get ahold of my Dr? (she said she likes to chat with them, I'm assuming to make sure you have a good relationship where antidepressant meds are concerned) But no, I have chosen to put all that down and just wait my turn. I have put this great importance on getting the surgery done before Christmas but what will happen if I have to wait? Pretty sure the world will still turn. Pretty sure life will carry on. I know it's because I am so damn sick of being fat, and am ready to get on with life and have the things being fat is keeping me from, but in the long run this is a short amount of time. So I will wait, and not freak out, and be as patient as I am capable of being.
