About me...

Jul 07, 2012

I've been a "big girl" for nearly all my life...OK, since the age of 6 or 7.  Long enough seeing how I'm nearly out of my 20s.  I always thought I'd get a handle on my weight and one day I'd be OK.  Wrong.  I was thinking all that while I was shopping at Goodys in the plus size department.  I remember looking at all the sizes I could go up before I wouldn't be able to wear anything from there.  I was a 22 then.  "Oh look, at least I'm not a 28."  How naive.  Cause now I'm there (barely) after coming out of a size 30.  I didn't even know they made size 30s 12 years ago. 

My only weapon, so to speak, against continued weight gain is adipex/phentermine.  I know there are many out there who are adamantly opposed to it.  It works for me.  Yes, I have in the past gained all the weight back and then some.  But I also didn't show any control over my eating either. 

I've been researching WLS since 2006 or so.  At the time, my DH had a good insurance plan that would cover the surgery.  I attended the seminar and did the testing.  The insurance didn't approve it at that time though b/c I didn't have a 6 mo. record of attempted weight loss.  So I gave up oh so easily.  And my husband got a new job...with insurance that doesn't cover anything about weight issues.  No surgery. No medicine.  Not even consultations/appts with my PCP to talk about me being obese.

I carry the majority of my weight in the front...from a huge chest to a huge pannus.  Obviously this makes mobility that much more difficult.  I have weight related knee pain and I notice now my hips get stiff if I sit too long (road trip, computer time, etc.)  I'm not as flexible as I was even when I was in the mid-200s.  And I've done this to myself.  If I could go back and tell my teen self that I was in for a world of hurt if I kept on that way, maybe things would be different.  Don't we always think we'll have time for something later? I'll do the laundry later.  I'll pay that bill later.  I'll lose this weight later.  Sometimes later doesn't come and we only have NOW.

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