lamerideth

Send Message

Block

Add Friend

Tuesday is such a useless day in my book.  Monday we drag ass to get everything done- that we didn't get done on Friday. Monday usually starts off bad but by the end of it,  we feel accomplished.  Wednesday is of course Hump day- enough said.  Thursday signifies that yes Virginia, there is a weekend.  Then we get to Friday.  Yippee, it's Friday!  The weekend officially sets sail. But what happened to Tuesday?  Tuesday seems to get lost in translation.  It's blah, it menial, and down right boring.  Mix it up with a little drizzle and you have a "stay in bed" kind of day.  Couldn't we just skip it and have a six day week?  You may be asking yourself- "what's up with the mood- Lee Ann".  All I can say is that  IT'S TUESDAY!

 

Wow, October- already!  It has been 6 years since my surgery.  I have had several surgerys since them, but none so life changing!  I am sitting here in my relatively new home ( since August ) thinking about how lucky I am.  Oh, I have my struggles, but I do have a roof over my head, food to eat and warm clothes to wear.  I have far more than a lot of people.  Granted, I have far less than a lot of people too!  I have never in my life met so many people that are totally down on their luck as I have in the last year.  I have met more homeless people than I should have ever met.  This is America, why do we have homeless, hungry people in our nation?  Anyway- enough of my soap box.

I am naive, gullable and vunerable-- and to be quite honest, I get taken advantage of a lot.  So many of my friends ask me why I do so much to help other people.  Am I a people pleaser???  Yes, to an extent.  Am I crazy??? Of Course!  I am compassionate, I feel deeply for my family, my friends and people in general.  I am also a control freak.  If there is a problem, I want to fix it.  Make everyone happy.  There are many reasons that I am the way that I am.  But mostly, I believe in helping people out- whether it benefits me or not.  I always think back to the story in the Bible where Jesus came to a man three times for help.  Each time it was as an undesirable person.  The man was generous and kind each time.  So when Jesus showed up- the man was beside him self trying to please him.  To his surprise, Jesus was already pleased.  The man had helped the others out of the kindness of his heart- not out of greed.  Jesus had come to him three times and the man responded by helping.

I want to be like that man.  I want to help people- people who share the air I breath and inhabit the same Earth I do.  I believe that our mission in life is simple- love one another and take care of each other.  We are humans, made in the image of God.  We should love as the Lord has loved us.

I just read my last post- YIKES- I was a real bummer!  I am happy to report that I feel much more optimistic than during the last post.  I lost 5 of the 10 lbs I gained.  I have been doing a little walking.  Mostly trying small things, like parking further away from the door and walking my daughter to her bus stop and back.  Also, the big news- We moved into a 1951 farm house.  It is so charming!  I love it!  It has been a challenge though, because my fiance and I moved in together.  Yes, I said fiance!  No rings have been bought, no dates have been discussed.  We just agreed that we both want to be married and neither of us are in a big hurry.  It is just one of those things we have to look forward to.  The challenge has been combining both household and getting used to living with all the kids in one house.  Although, my oldest daughter has moved out.  The best thing about the situation is that we have a great house.  It has a few issues that we are trying to work out, but it is so charming and eclectic.  I am however, tired of all the boxes sitting around, that I have to put away or try to find a place to put them!  Mostly, I am so happy to finally be happy!

Not feeling very optimistic today.  I feel horrible and it is yet to be discovered what is wrong with me.  I went to the psychiatrist- he gave me wellbutrin.  I Went to my regular doc and he ordered blood test ( which I have not done because it is fasting and I keep having low blood sugars during the night).  And the absolute worse thing is that I have gained 10 lbs!  I have no energy, can barely keep up with the kids and baby Tyler.  I am running ragged and my poor car is on its last leg- and then I am really screwed!  What really sucks is that I always bitch about people having pity parties for themselves- and here I am doing it. On a positive note: the sun is shining and I am alive!  I guess it is time for me to turn that frown upside down and put on a happy face!

Thank God!!  The holidays are over.  Since Halloween, I have had a major sweet tooth.  I have been eating candy everyday and the scale shows it!  I gained 6 lbs since halloween.  So, now I am back on my diet.  I admit, that I feel better already-without the sweets! My blood sugar thanks me, too.  I am missing chocolate alot- had really gotten use to eating a candy bar everyday.  Also, cutting back on kool-aid!  More water!  Hopefully, the scale will indicate a positive change soon!  I want to loose 5lbs a month.  It shouldn't be that hard--- ha!  Wish me luck!  Until the next post--

So, She did it!  Chloe' made it through the 5K.  It was hard and I do admit that I had a sinking feeling while I was waiting at the finish line.  A lot of thoughts went running through my head:  Was 8 years old too young to run/walk a 5k?  Will she be able to finish?  How will she feel when she does finish?  I also have to admit that when the other girls started to cross the finish line- I began to worry.  We waited, what seemed forever, but finally- down the track- I saw a bright green t-shirt.  I knew it must be her.  I began to walk towards her, trying to encourage her to keep going.  There was a look of pain on her face and quite honestly, it scared me.  She had two teachers from her school there, one on each side of her.  Almost as if they were dragging her towards the finish line.  I walked towards her and smiled. " You are almost there", I said.  At that moment, I wanted to pick her up and carry her over the finish line.  I held back.  She began to jog towards the finish line- the last few steps, she was determined.  I began to jog behind her, cheering her on.  I stopped right before the finish line, stood back and watched her cross it!  I was delighted and SO PROUD!  I quickly darted towards the end of the finish line, only to find her gulping a bottle of water.  She saw me- I saw her- we hugged.  That is when the tears started to flow.  She was exhausted.  Her main concern was that she finished last.  Of course I told her that winning was not important- finishing, now that was the challenge.  She succeeded!
Now, I had thought about walking the race with her.  But I didn't.  First of all, I have never been able to walk more than 2 miles at a time.  The few times I did it- I felt like Fred Samford- "I'm a coming Elizabeth"!  Seriously, I do not think I could have finished the race.  The humiliation of it all.  Having to be picked up on a golf cart and taken to the finish line.  NO THANK YOU!  Not to mention that the runners fee was twenty-five dollars.  To be honest, Christmas is right around the corner and I simply could not justify spending Christmas money on a race that I probably wouldn't finish.  So, I have a lot of guilt, maybe if I had gone with her she would have done better.  Hog wash,  We might have both ended up in the golf  cart.  No, this is one thing that she had to do on her own, at least with out me.  Plus, she did have classmates and teachers from her school running too.  She wasn't alone.
Even though she has declared that she will not run it again, I hope she changes her mind.  She enjoyed the training twice a week, running, walking, playing with classmates and getting to know some of the teachers better.  Three of her best friends were also in the race.  It is a great program that builds esteem and teaches encouragement. 
When she did cross the finish line, she received a medal for finishing.  As a treat, we went to Steak N Shake for lunch- her favorite place to eat.  By this time, she was over being last and excited that she finished.  Oh, her feet  and her back were hurting and she hungry and tired.  And then it happend.  She smiled and quickly showed the waitress her medal!  PRIDE!  I finally saw pride in her eyes.  As a parent, we are often proud of our children.  Most of us make a point to tell them that we are proud.  Especially when they pass a test, bring home good grades or make some spectacular refridgerator art.  I think that is important to let your pride in your children show.  But- I also think we need to teach our children what pride is all about.  They need to have pride in their own accomplishments, they need to be proud in themselves.  It strengthens their self esteem and teaches them goal setting and planning so that they can achieve their goals. 
I will always show my girls how proud I am of them and I will teach them that being proud of their own accomplishments is just as important as trying to please everyone else.  If they are facing a challenge- let them work it out, if they succeed- make sure they know that they should be proud of themselves.  If they fail- and at some point, they will- again, let them work it out.  Be sympathetic, but above all, be encouraging.  When they were beginning to walk,  they would fall-  we picked them up, tended to their wounds (both physical and mental) and we sent them on their way- to try again.  Finally, they had it down.  Their walking turned into running.  Watching them grow up is scary and satisfying.  Just like Chloe' running a 5k, we are all in training.  We are training so that we can fulfill our destiny and be the person that God intended us to be.  Sometimes we want to give up, we want to cry and we want to yell.  We may have lost sight of our purpose.  Do not despair- God knows our purpose, we just have to figure it out.  And until that time we must keep running until we cross that finish line. 

OK!  I know it, now I need to live it!   I have to go to the gym!  The holidays are coming and I will eat!  Lots of fattening foods, sweets, breads... etc....  So,  maybe tomorrow.   lol
I need to take a lesson from my 8 year old.  She is running a 5k next Saturday.  What gumption, I wouldn't even try it.  At first, I thought about walking it... but I am afraid the medics would have to cart me away.  What a picture!  Oh it does sound funny- but would be quite humiliating for me and probably scarry for Chloe'.  So, I will pass.  Maybe next year- after I lose another 80 lbs.  I am having surgery on my hand sometime in the near future.  The doc is a plastics and hand guy.  I think I will ask him for a two for one-  Get the hand done and he throws in the upper body lift.   It is a thought!
So, much for today.  Take care everyone!

I am so frustrated in not having my computer back.   I guess it is done, but unable to be delivered.  Yikes!    Anyway- enough bitchen.   I weighed at the doc the other day.... no new losses--- but no gain either.  I must admit I am a bit surprised, I have been indulging myself a little more than usual.  I even bought chips!  Although I will say that I am happy to report it took me days to eat them and I didn't eat all by myself.  Used to take hours to eat a whole bag of chips.  Then there is the kool-aid.  Don't ask..... I have gotten cravings for kool-aid.  I feel 8!  
Everything is still crazy around here.  Kids are getting tired of school already-- of course, Sarah is excited about going to SWIC in Jan.   I can't believe that my first born is going to college!  Abi has really gotten into Girl scouts and so has Chloe'.   Abi is in choir and SAVE/Beta and Chloe' is in Girls on the run.  They are both keeping busy!  Fletch and I have done pretty well in our attempt to live together.  I am sorry that it is coming to an end.  I will miss him-  I am used to having him here every night--- but that will make our "sleep overs" more special!  I guess I should be happy that his house is finished and ready to move into.  But sad that our trial run is over.  
I am looking forward to halloween, I hope the weather cooperates!  

I have been without a computer for two weeks.  I am using other people's computers to check email and such! 
As far as the weigh loss goes- haven't lost any lately, but have maintained my current weight for a while.  Still hoping to lose another 80 lbs!  I have lost 223 lbs, but am looking forward to losing the rest of it- or atleast attain my goal!
I am glad that school has started.  We can get into our school routine soon.  The kids are exhausted when they come home and will be until they get used to the schedule.  I am babysitting the grandkids almost everyday.  Busy is an understatement, but that is ok.  Keeps me on my toes!  lol

Wow- it has been so hot this past week with no relief in sight.  I certainly hope we get some relief soon.  At least we are not experiencing a lack of rain fall.  The tomato plants are growing very nicely.
Had Bible School all this past week.  Chloe's was adorable- singing and dancing.  She is going to Nana's for a week and Abi will be staying with her Dad most of the week.  I am hoping to get some work done around the house.  I also need to go school supply shopping.  So much to do and never enough time or energy!  I am hoping to work in a trip to the Y this week.  I haven't been exercising at all-- well except for chasing three kids around all day!  Some days- it is four!  So, I guess I am getting some sort of workout!   lol
I haven't gotten on the scale lately- but clothes are getting looser, so I think I have lost.  I am planning a trip to doctors office to weigh this week.  I stop by there often and weigh.  It keeps me more accurate.  SO- here's to being a loser!