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Well Monday December 7th is the big day of my RNY.  I don't feel nervous more excited!  This will be the start of a new me.  I have read everything I can to prepare me for this big day.  I don't want to fail.  I feel like I've been given a wonderful gift.

Ten years ago I thought I would never be sitting in the seat that I am.  I have always been a thin person so this is even harder for me to except.  I went from a thin woman who recently divorced an abusive husband.  Hence the thin body.  I never ate thanks to my ex-husband.  Then I met Dave.  He swept me off my feet.  What a sweet and loving guy.  I never would have thought a man would ever do what he could to make me happy but he did and he still does 10 years later and 130 lbs later.  I tell myself all the time that he loved you before you were fat he still loves you when you are fat but who loves themselves. REALLY  So meeting Dave brought me marriage, 2 miscarriages, then Rachel and 5 years later another miscarriage.  Yeah now I'm overweight.  My body is not sure if it has a metabolism anymore.  I tried every diet and then tried them again.  Now I can't get an approval from insurance.  They turned me down 3 times and the last time was a lame reason.  The denied me because they could not read the information that we submitted.  Now the surgeon is involved.  I hope and pray she will get this overturned.  I keep gaining instead of loosing.

Well I have been turned down 3 times from insurance for my RNY.  The 3 rd time was because a letter they requested was not unreadable (can you believe that!).  I swear my insurance wants me to give up.  According to my Surgery Center the doctor is going to talk to insurance's doctor and usually it will get overturned.  The thing is my luck never goes that way.

I just can't take much more waiting.  I'm not a patient person.

I'm scared I'm going to an amuesment park tomorrow and I'm afraid I'm not going to be able to walk all day.  Then there are the rides I'm not going to fit on.  I just want to be approved for this.