Week 4

Dec 17, 2011

It is nearing the end of week 4. I am having bouts of feeling depressed, feeling like a failure. I have lost 27 lbs...however most of that was in the first two weeks. I lost nothing week 3 and then dropped 3 lbs week 4. I feel like I am binge eating..but when I count my calories it is always below 700. I think my mind is playing tricks on me.

I went out for dinner last night and felt like I really ate a lot. I had half a cup of chowder, a crab cake (about one inch diameter) and two spoonfuls of crab dip. It took me two hours to eat it so I felt like I was eating more than everyone else.

I know that it is all in my head. I have dieted so many times, lost the weight and gained it back. This time it will not happen that way..but I can't really imagine myself being skinny.

So far my biggest challenge is the evening when I just want to eat. I am lonely, stressed, bored and have always used food to comfort those feelings. I can't do that anymore. Not only that but I will not be able to sabatage myself like I normally do. This is a huge change and it is going to happen. I am scared to death.
M

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